Help me help hubby

Im married 4 kids and hubby has migraines .. He is currently on preventative meds .. But has migraine at least 2 times a wk .. On the wkends whichdrives me crazy .. Im startin 2 feel like a single parent .. All fam plans go out the window .. He refuses 2 go bak 2 the doctor .. And says his meds work .. I cant carry on like this .. I dread nething we have booked 2 do as a fam .. And i offically hate migraines .. Its ruinin his my kids and my lifes .. Advice pls ... I want 2 try and make a difference 2 all our lives b4 .. It ruins it 4 good x

7 Replies

  • Hi there, while I appreciate your life is difficult at the moment, migraines are horrible and can be life-changing. I really think you should try and be a little more understanding. It's not just a bad headache.

    Sometimes the stress of knowing you have to be well at a certain date because of a family outing can actually make it more likely you'll end up with a migraine.

    There are lots of preventative medications around, some of them work better than others. Maybe you could try and gently persuade your husband to have a review of his migraine medications. Also he should be careful with his diet, avoiding things like ALL artificial sweeteners, ALL artificial flavourings, MSG etc. Maybe try and keep a food diary for a week or two, it may pinpoint something.

    I am a long-term migraine sufferer, (over 20 years). I have found that Pizotifen controls my migraines, makes them much milder, but hasn't stopped them completely.

    Hang in there, things will get better.

  • Hi, I too have suffered Migraines for over 60years , Have tried many different medications, the one's I take are amitriptine which is a preventative medication and when I get a migraine I have taken Zomig which takes the headache away between 30-60mins I don't get any side affects, the other is Sumatriptin which is very good as well, their are many more medications for migraine, its just getting the right one that suits your husband. It would be a good idea for your husband, to go and see his Dr to discuss other medications . Please be patient with your husband Migraines are very painful and very hard to understand unless you have suffered with them yourself.

    I hope your Husband finds a medication which suits him, and that you will be able to get back to normal. I hope I have been of some help to you.

  • I've suffered migraines for the last 10 years and it has been life changing for all our family - I take amytriptaline and Lyrica as preventative which has helped manage my migraines, if I have a migraine I take Sumatriptan injection which normally gets rid of them within 2 hours! I have had to cancel so many social events, it's very frustrating and I've put myself under a great deal of stress trying to do things when I'm suffering from a migraine!! Unfortunately migraine symptoms don't stay the same, they can change which tweaking your meds to try and get them back under control! Be patient and supportive - explain the situation to your children and mAke the most of the day's your husband is well!

  • There are various Triptons (Rizotriptan, zolotriptan) which will take away headaches, but can only be taken about 2x's a week to avoid re-bound headaches.

  • I realise now after 40 years with increasingly severe migraines, just how thoughtful and kind my husband and family have been. I cannot remember one negative comment from them when I have been too ill to take part in family life.

    Please try to understand your husband. Perhaps you could quietly and calmly ask him how he feels the migraine is affecting him and his life, then you may be able to talk about how it is affecting you and the children. Try to have this conversation in a calm manner so he doesn't feel you are blaming him for being ill. You obviously have strong feelings about how migraine is affecting family life, so you both need to talk about it so you can find a way of living with this situation.

  • Yes it's very disappointing to have migs ruin your social life as I know too well and the guilt you feel when you know you are ruining your others half-family's fun too, is immense.

    Migraines is a complex neurological brain disorder which some of us are unlucky enough to suffer with. It's not just a headache that can be shrugged off or solved with 2 paracetamol it's a severe unrelenting pain with nausea vomiting dizziness visual disturbance and a whole host of other horrible symptoms. During a bad mig I have to lie in a dark room for 2 days sometimes and feel so ill that I cannot move. Literally.

    It's like everything unless you have experienced it yourself we never know what it's like

    Nobody can help suffering illness it happens to us all but kindness and understanding go a long way to easing the burden of guilt mig sufferers feel which is just all added pressure

    I hope your husband can find some relief - I also hope you realise how lucky you are not to suffer from migraine

  • Well... I feel for your husband as I'm not a parent BECAUSE of the way my migraines are at the moment. It's a very difficult life to lead and he cannot help it... I regularly have to miss family things or have to re-plan my life according to when a migraine strikes.

    Why is your husband refusing to go back to the doctor? If the migraines are as regular are twice weekly they are clearly not working or are not strong enough doses. I never found the preventive medications to work - I just took painkillers as/when the moment struck.

    With 2 migraines a week he would probably qualify for the Botox therapy. I've done this twice now. It doesn't get rid of the migraines altogether, but does reduce frequency and intensity.

    Nothing is a panacea because there is no cure for migraines. Your husband needs lots of support because he probably feels responsible for you feeling this way even though he really cannot help having this disability.

    Please try and be patient with this. Migraines are a disability and can be extremely debilitating. It's something you have to learn to live with and adapt to or else it takes total control.

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