How to cope with negative pressure fr... - Mental Health Sup...

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How to cope with negative pressure from parents?

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I'm a teenager. My dad doesn't live with us. Relation with mom was pretty good till some years ago. The more I grow up I think our relation is degrading, in terms of real self. My mom can't accept my real self and she wants to control every choice. Moreover she thinks my thoughts are crooked and abnormal. I think she hates me. I often feel lonely and depressed for it. What should I do to feel better.......

7 Replies

Hello, welcome

Sorry you are going through a rough time, I understand you come from the Far East where male, female relationships are different from what we have here.

From when I was ten years old I was disowend from my Mother because I failed an examination, and my Mother had two female siblings, the age difference was ten and twelve years respectivly, my father was unable to prevent the up and coming problems I was to to have because of this and many of my problems did not end until Her Death two years ago and sad to say my Siblings have kept up with the snaking and spitting in a metaphoric way.

Personally I do not know the reasons for the problems you have regards your Father, Therefore I do not know the dynamic between Father and Mother. However you are getting older at sixteen, in some countries that is the beginning of adulthood, so could that be part of the problem because your Father may have been able to take part in His critical roll on your coming of age. The relationhip between Father and son could be mirrored between Mothers and Daughters.

I know in my case I was not ready as I approached my mid teens as at school I was nearly a year younger than my counterparts so I remained that far behind

in my final years at school. My Mother was a teacher in Mathematics and English and would not help me. Sorry this has gone on a bit, I am trying to explain the dynamic of family life and the Far East.

Is there any way you could try and see your Father more often, that may help especially if you still live at home

BOB

Hello. Thank you so much for your kind reply. Yes you're right about father-son relation mirroring mother& daughter. But my father actually doesn't have a bonding with us. He lives overseas and doesn't care much about responsibility. Therefore reaching out to family members never resulted positive.But I really appreciate how you tried to help me by sharing own experience. I once again realized we don't have control over family. We just have to cope with it continuously I guess. But I really pray hope find the right life partner for the rest of your life. Best wishes .

Yes Reader I have been married now for over forty years, now we can read eachothers mind.

Is there any male relatives you can talk to that may help you. As we get near seventeen, eightine we start to consider those various activities that lead us into adulthood. How are you for male friendships ?

BOB

The boys I tried to befriend seemed interested more in something more than just friends. Also because from little I've never ACTUALLY seen any healthy masculinity in men, I really fear to interact with opposite gender.

Btw a light question : Is your age like my uncle or grandpa? 😊

I am seventy one in three weeks time

What's BOB btw?

A male Pensioner in the North of England

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