Looking for a wishing well: My freind... - Mental Health Sup...

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Looking for a wishing well

paul078 profile image
5 Replies

My freind of 20 years has huntingtons disease and its hard work looking after her when im not well my self , she has been took off the radar so to say , and releys on my constantly , she hasnt got anyone else no family or freinds due to our health problems we pushed good people a way years ago which i regret now i need a helping hand a freind etc ... she is a lovely lady who has been threw the wars ex partners knocking her about and her children have just come back into her life after 11 years and they are making things worse and think she is fine , saying nastys things about me and my sister which is dreadful for what i have done for there mum , there just out for them selfs and my mental health is threw the roof cannot take it anymore i just want the best for her and then i can try and get my life back into shape , constant pain,depression floaters in eyes , lack of energy losing the will to live and i feel like it will never end , then whats going on out in the crazy world dont help 😔

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paul078 profile image
paul078
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5 Replies

Paul

The most important thing in your life at this time is you look after yourself and move yourself on in a positive way.

Over the years I have looked after many of my old relatives and to be honest with you, the problems seem to arise because people or family members are mercenary in the lives and attitude for others. I look around me for serious understanding of peoples needs and expectations and saddens me before they stand up on the plate. People always ask what is in it for ME.

The more we care, the more people feel we have ulterior motives and that can really hurt.

Look after your own needs and expectations, I gather years may be beginning to catch up on, forgive me if I am wrong. I will be seventy soon and the older I get the more I begin to understand what awaits me in my near future. I have enjoyed My Life looking after others and I will say enjoy what you are doing with your friend, although do not expect any real understanding from others, that is a thing of the past.

I have two Sisters who are very unpleasant in my eyes, their is a dark cloud over their Heads So sad they are not looking at the big picture, We all all need help as we get older, however in many ways that will be another story as I will no longer be here. My expectations are nil

BOB

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54

Well your friend might be able to get benefits such as P.I.P then she would be able to afford carers. Have a look on the govt site at gov.UK.

in reply to hypercat54

B.

There is a new system coming in the UK where you arrange a carer to live in and look after you. This can be a better way of getting home care especially if you do not wish to go into a Nursing Home. All you need is a spare bedroom.

How are you, hope you are well ?

BOB

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to

All you need? Well I hope I never need this as I live in a 1 bedroom flat! There is already a system whereby a carer gets carers allowance so you have to find someone able and willing to do that. It won't be for professional carers that's for sure! x

in reply to hypercat54

B.

They are setting up with Agencies at this time. Personally, we live with two bedrooms, the second room is like a store room at the moment.

Personally I will resist if I am pushed towards a Nursing Home, I am generally nice and peaceful here and we are managing quite well at this time.

Mind things are looking a bit rough down south it seems to be nice and peaceful here although the Council has changed all the access roads in the centre and that will just make more problems

BOB xx

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