What's going on with me?..

This started yesterday and continued today.i suddenly have no appetite to eat even tho i'm starving.i have starved myself again when i woke up.despite me being lazy to get up and prepare food or do anything else..i mean sure i wont have energy without food but also i just don't want to eat...am i fed up of food or is it because i feel pressurised with college? When infact i usually try to escape from these problems by eating alot especially sweets.i don't know.why can't i for once to handle stuff on my own?..i mean i guess when i was worried how i'll do in quizzes and exams and think ill fail and it turns out opposite..and i thank god for that.but i started thinking yesterday and remembered i have other things to prepare next week and i felt like i finish from something then other things come..im thinking till when? And they are just getting harder and harder..but i want to correct myself and help my parents and pay them back ..when i came back from college after my test i was thinking maybe i'll feel better and get to like to study and more importantly self-study because i am going to need it for a project making interface using programming language. But those possitive thoughts changed quickly and i just feel not ready..what the more if i entered bachelor..but i don't know..anyhow everybody has their own capabilities.and i'll try to relax a little and try to do atleast part of the things i need to do for next week..please pray for me that i'll pass this term and get rid of this negative energy i have..

[ImBroken]

LemoDana I'm no expert at this but in a way I understand how you feel. I get negative thoughts and dread future events sometimes, and the best advice I could give you is to talk to people about it and get them to help you. This will be beneficial for your revision because you can get people to quiz you. I don't know how college works, but I'd say to split up what you need to know into sections and tackle them individually, and reward yourself after. Good luck!

[hypercat54]

Hi it sounds like you are going through a bad time at the moment. The way to deal with these is just to hunker down and concentrate on getting through the days and doing what you can. Do not under any circumstances let yourself think further ahead than today and certainly not the future. The future will take care of itself so just live in the present for now.

As for not eating my old mum always said things look better on a full stomach - and guess what I have realised she is right. Now sit yourself down and grab a banana or a sandwich or something. x

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LemoDana

Education when studying never really gets any easier and if you are concerned about your performance that can cause people to restrict their input of wholesome food, preferring sweet stuffs and comfort foods.

When Parents are paying for your education the need to perform well can be a real problem, confidence can take a wobbler and sad to say that can make us feel we are unable to move on in our subjects of learning.

Reading above seems to prove you are doing well and if that is the case you need to gain confidence in your chosen subjects. In some ways my education was very much similar and I would feel lacking in my educational outlook. You need to gain confidence on past successes. and consider the challenge an exiting time in your life.

If you feel you are not achieving have words with your housemaster and parents, hopefully you will gain more confidence in the future and achieve the goals awaiting you in your future

BOB

[EmmyLoop]

Hi LemoDana,

I'm glad you were able to get all that out. There was probably a time when you weren't even sure how to put those thoughts into words. In order to rid ourselves of negative energy, or implement any personal change, we have to correctly identify what needs changing and what has been causing the undesirable event or action in the first place. Anxiety and depression are tricky, especially because one can masquerade as the other. For instance, every month around a certain time, I would have very disturbing intrusive thoughts, like me accidentally running over my pets with my car. They were such saddening thoughts, I told my psychiatrist that I was experiencing this awful depression for years. I told her what they were, and she quickly said, "Oh no, that's not depression, that's anxiety." Also, I've had anxiety to where I dissociated (emotionally/mentally numb) then became drowsy due to the stress. Because I was so sleepy, I thought I was depressed. Or, depression can keep a person awake at night. Can you see how that could be mistaken for anxiety? Bearing all that in mind...

In the past, I have been so completely overwhelmed by emotion that it was almost impossible to eat. Perhaps, since my mind felt out of control emotionally, it coped by strictly controlling my diet.

We eat sweets (and fats and other carbs) when we're depressed to increase our serotonin. You probably thought you were anxious when you were "medicating" with sweets, but you might have been depressed instead.

Finally, if you truly want to change your circumstances, you are 40% more likely to follow through if you write it down. Instead of trying to store your plan of action in your head, write it down so you can see the cause and effect of it all. It does NOT have to be detailed and complicated. Some goals are better reached if planned in lots of detail, but this isn't one of them. Also, you don't have to tell friends so they can hold you accountable--personal change is a personal journey. If you do want to share this or talk it over or you need guidance, your university has programs in which students who are studying to become professional counselors are available for students, usually free of charge. They need a certain number of hours of experience to graduate and become licensed, so you would both be helping each other. It truly is a service to others, if you want to look at it that way, and many would say that is the most effective way to rid yourself of negative energy. You don't have to volunteer at a soup kitchen. There are smaller, and often more powerful, ways to serve others; you just have to stay aware and they will show themselves to you.

Let me know how things go,

Emmy