Suicidal thoughts?: How do you cope... - Mental Health Sup...

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Suicidal thoughts?

lalaxd profile image
44 Replies

How do you cope when youre suffering from suicidal thoughts?

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lalaxd profile image
lalaxd
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44 Replies
gerrerd profile image
gerrerd

Change your thoughts

AnxiousHeart14 profile image
AnxiousHeart14 in reply to gerrerd

It’s not that easy. If it were, no one would be suicidal. Most of the times demons speak louder than the angels within us

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to AnxiousHeart14

Who said it would be easy ? Haven't you noticed yet that nothing on here is easy. Read over some of the posts and you will see so many courageous people trying to get better and at the same time trying to help others. You can do this too. Forget the demon crap, I'm serious. You are the only one responsible for your own thoughts. Now that I've been harsh to you I'm hoping you can take it. Pam

AnxiousHeart14 profile image
AnxiousHeart14 in reply to sweetiepye

I was replying to the person that said “change your thoughts. That is not helpful. That makes me feel useless tbh. Because it’s not that easy to just change the way you think after years of dealing with these thoughts. It’s not really “crap” when it explains exactly what I feel @sweetiepye

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to AnxiousHeart14

You do have control over your thoughts. I have had your experience and I know to get better you have to face the things that are bothering you. I could give you all the easy nice things to hear ,but that would not help you.. You should not feel useless because someone suggested you change your thoughts. Why do you think you do ?The reference to demons being crap is because once you start thinking in those terms you turn over all responsibility for yourself to something that doesn't exists.Pam

AnxiousHeart14 profile image
AnxiousHeart14 in reply to sweetiepye

Back to my original point. If it were that easy to have control over our thoughts, no one would be suicidal. But we are, so clearly it is hard to gain control over your thoughts. And if you have been through the experience, you should also know how hard it is to get up and do anything. So facing problems is a challenge, especially when you try to face the problems and it fails. Leaving you demotivated. And useless. Because we try and fail. So the thoughts come back for “what’s the point? Why am I bothering?”

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to AnxiousHeart14

My point is that it is not easy. You try and if you fail, you try again. That doesn't make you useless, you get a little stronger each time.

in reply to sweetiepye

Changing thoughts: I HAVE had experience (other people) and depression causes some people to have powerful extreme feelings of hopelessness and despair. 'Unbearable' is the key word.

So unless you're one of the lucky and staunch ones, this doesn't help persons who fully experience the above.

There are support groups - DBSA, but I think it's in America.

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to

What do you think therapist and support groups are trying to do? Help you to change your thoughts perhaps? You have no idea what I've been through and comparing degrees of mental side effects is odious . I am now changing my thoughts and will let this thread go. Pam

in reply to sweetiepye

Bye bye...

lalaxd profile image
lalaxd in reply to sweetiepye

So essentially do you believe antidepressants shouldnt be prescribed? Because we should just face whats bothering us and control our thoughts?

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to lalaxd

How did you come to that conclusion? I'm afraid it's a little more complicated than that. Did you actually read what I wrote. You use whatever your therapist recommends, but eventually you learn to control your thoughts. What is the alternative?

lalaxd profile image
lalaxd in reply to sweetiepye

No youre right that was me responding from a place of hurt, and frustration

I hear you but i feel powerless to change my thoughts

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to lalaxd

You are not powerless. You are probably looking at the whole lot and it's easier to take things in small parts. When you are having negative thoughts try to do something that engages your mind a little. Get up and move your body.Play some music and dance, or take a shower and sing, clean the fridge. It will loosen your body, help you to relax, and put your mind in a different place. It's a good idea to think of things to do before you are feeling bad. Have a list and share it, I need new ideas.Pam

gerrerd profile image
gerrerd in reply to AnxiousHeart14

Sorry I did not mean to be harsh, but the only way out of it is to change your thoughts. We have to take control of our thoughts that is were the problem is, Be responsible look for ways to do this books, self help programs, hypnosis, meditation. release methods. read posts on the forum, etc, it is endless what you can do to help your self. RAY

Patient0 profile image
Patient0 in reply to gerrerd

I like what you said. It's the only way I get myself out of these feelings. I have to take control. Sometimes it's quick and easy and other times painfully slow. Either way, I learn something about myself and find strength that I never knew I had. It's a good strategy for recurring depression.

gerrerd profile image
gerrerd in reply to Patient0

Ive used it for 47 years, and still use it. no one can sort your head out, only you.

lalaxd profile image
lalaxd in reply to gerrerd

I genuinely cant change my thoughts, i believe them 100% honestly getting out of bed is a tremendous battle that i dont always win

I cant 'think positive' or think myself out of it

And i feel like more of a failure because ive been unwell for years and havent been able to 'think myself out of it',

gerrerd profile image
gerrerd in reply to lalaxd

Try Self hypnosis, go to potentials unlimited on line. Get a relaxation session and see how you go, the more you use them the more your thoughts will start to change,

Patient0 profile image
Patient0 in reply to lalaxd

I believe that maybe something is keeping you there? Have you explored why you feel so helpless? I was once asked by a therapist if there was an element of "poor me" in my attitude which was keeping me stuck there... Was I enjoying the pity? I'm not saying this is you...only you know that. I think ultimately though, only you can be responsible for your own happiness. If it's change in diet, lifestyle or thinking it's got to be you. You can seek help but again that's on you. You are worth it so give yourself a chance to get better.

in reply to gerrerd

Not that easy sir.

in reply to gerrerd

That's a pat answer.

gerrerd profile image
gerrerd in reply to

As you think so shall you be

in reply to gerrerd

We actually don't need proverbs here.

Evidently you're clueless about suicide thoughts.

Think about that.

gerrerd profile image
gerrerd in reply to

read my profile please my frind

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54

You put it off until the next day. The next day you wake up in the morning and decide today isn't going to be the day though tomorrow might. I have successfully put it off for over 30 years by doing this.

The other thing I do is trawl suicide sites looking for painless ways to do it and by the time I realise there aren't any, and read other's stories I am put right off the idea until next time. It works for me and it might for you.

The point about making the decision early every morning is that it leaves the day free from worry and enables you to enjoy and experience it more fully. x

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply to hypercat54

My Mother was an ER nurse and she used to tell me of the unsuccessful suicide attempts that she experienced. People who did things that left themselves paralyzed or brain dead , you get the idea. It always gave me second thoughts. Pam

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to sweetiepye

Yuck! I know a woman who jumped in a suicide attempt and ended up just losing a leg. Another one also jumped and ended up as a paraplegic. x

Patient0 profile image
Patient0

Make myself useful to somebody else by volunteering. It helps me to remember that I deserve to be here. I walk in nature and take time to appreciate it. There is always hope and beauty in this World. Just look for it.

Satsuma profile image
Satsuma

By finding distractions and keeping your mind as active as you can .. Absorb yourself in something you like to do

Suzie40 profile image
Suzie40

I remind myself that it's just a thought and that I have total control of my thoughts.

AnxiousHeart14 profile image
AnxiousHeart14

I tell myself I will do it tomorrow instead, and go to sleep, because you can’t do anything in your sleep. You are safe. If I can’t sleep I tell myself “everything will be better when I fall asleep, I just have to go to sleep”. Then once you wake up in the morning, whatever you were thinking about the night before, isn’t normally as big of a problem.

Good luck and stay safe x

AnxiousHeart14 profile image
AnxiousHeart14

Well said x

Stilltrying_ profile image
Stilltrying_

I use total distraction (such as forcing myself to go the gym, forcing myself to go to classes etc) during the day. Sometimes I discuss my suicidal feelings with appropriate people which can help release the shame and the stress but I don't discuss with most people. I just join in a normal conversation. I also use the "sleep " thing a lot. I am safe when I am asleep but each day I wake up to the same feelings and it is exhausting and difficult. I also try the 24 hour rule if I am very close. I give it 24 hours and then rethink. I often feel like it but other factors such as fear (as hypercat says there's no pain free or foolproof method; you may try and then end up very disabled (just look on some of the disability forums and how they got their disabilites such as brain damage; not all of them but some, and this frightens me enough not to try). So basically I use anything and everything I can to stay safe but it is completely exhausting and an endless battle at the moment.

Gambit62 profile image
Gambit62

this post may give you some ideas

healthunlocked.com/couchtob...

gerrerd profile image
gerrerd

Sorry lalaxd I was harsh with my reply, I have sent you a message, and will try to help you. Love from Ray.

En1234 profile image
En1234

I feel for you, I really do....Sometimes, when you are in a "not so bad place" it is easy to tell others to try and be a bit more positive but for the person who is feeling it, it IS easier said than done.

I went through my own set of "crap" and things happened to make my life better and so I thought I was in a good place and when this also didnt work out I was left yet again feeling low and despondent..I stopped drinking months ago and at the weekend I had one glass of wine, which led to another and well you can guess the rest...and I only done this because I thought "whats the point". Today and yesterday I got up and put on whatever clothes I could find and went walking for over 2 hours. I find the fresh air helps me but does not necessarily get rid of the horrible feeling in the pit of your stomach, or the pain in your head. I have been finding myself having these thoughts a lot too but my problem is that I just dont have the courage to do it "today".... I CANT sleep and would just love some peace in my life but my brain refuses to switch off. And you know what they say about not being able to sleep, you never see things the same way as when you have been well rested....

Nobody can tell you how to feel or how to manage your thoughts. I think when you are as low as this the only thing you can do is try and aim to do one SMALL thing at a time because when you feel this low even making a cup of tea or washing your face is a BIG thing and too much effort. You need to start with the baby steps again...

I hope you start feeling better soon and rest assured you are certainly not on your own with how you feel...XXXX

Brokenstrings profile image
Brokenstrings

I just think “not today”, I’m not sure if that is me being strong or weak though.

En1234 profile image
En1234 in reply to Brokenstrings

I just sometimes wish I had the courage....

MAS_Nurse profile image
MAS_Nurse

Hi lalxd,

Check out this information on the Mind UK website, especially their tips on self-help: mind.org.uk/information-sup...

t's is important to get professional medical advice from your GP or local mental health team. Keep the communication channels open with them and those you feel you can trust to share how you are feeling and thinking.

Check out Pinned Posts section for free mental health guides.

Keep handy our International Crisis Support Helplines:healthunlocked.com/mental-h...

Or if you live in the UK:

The Samaritans Tel: 116 123 [24 hours line]

NHS: 999 [Emergencies]

NHS 111 [Non-Emergencies]

MIND UK charity: Helpline Tel: 0300 123 3393 info@mind.org.uk Text: 86463 mind.org.uk/information-sup...

SANEline Tel: 0300 304 7000 [4.30pm – 10.30pm daily] sane.org.uk/

Stay safe! We are listening and want to support you.

Best wishes,

MAS Nurse

arty40 profile image
arty40 in reply to MAS_Nurse

Nobody wants to actually listen when you are so low

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye

I would prefer a solution any day over having my hand held. You can learn to control your thoughts which is necessary for mental health. As for demons, I think you are really stretching to find fault.

My Therapist is teaching me this process called Thought Stopping, where you replace a negative thought with a positive one. It's not easy and takes a lot of time and practice to achieve, but it does work. I still have trouble with it at times. I also stimm (rock back and forth), but I'm also Autistic. It does help calm me down and relax, though. Try practicing meditation, breathing techniques, try to force yourself to do what you enjoy, a hobby of yours, make sure you get out of the house and always try to surround yourself with good people. Talk to someone, us if you need or want to. We are all just a message away. I hope this helps, hun. Have a good day if you can.

arty40 profile image
arty40

To the gerrerd person who says change your thoughts if it was that easy we woouldnt need places like this

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