Happy

[Singer1234]

I find helping others makes me happy.

But doing anything for myself makes me angry.

Any thoughts.

[sweetiepye]

Someone put those thoughts of not being a valuable person into your head enough that you believed them. Maybe more than one person. Done through not being able to love because they were not loved. These things get passed round and round. We don't have to believe it. You are good and kind, smart and independent , so many loveable traits.

[Kaiyote_Kirigaya]

Hi Singer! I think a lot of folks find themselves in this kind of situation unfortunately. In dealing with my own depression and anxiety I often find myself putting myself down because for one reason or another I think I'm someone who is either not meant to be happy or undeserving of anything good yet I truly want others to be happy. It can be difficult to do but really trying to pinpoint what sort of thoughts might lead up to this sort of insecurity can be helpful in trying to reverse this negative thought cycle.

For me personally I think my insecurities come from one major aspect of my life. I have a lot of anxiety when around other people even family members and I find myself comparing myself to them. I feel its nothing they did wrong, they are just better than me in some way. They don't seem to have as much trouble getting out of bed every morning. They don't have to take medications every day just to fight off the fatigue and sadness. They are happy.

I really have to remind myself that I don't have to compare myself to anyone. Everyone has their own narrative and their own history. Everyone has their own issues whether we see them or not and often times the ones who struggle the most can have the warmest hearts. I think if you look at yourself and how you treat others so positively you would see that you are someone deserving of a little self love.

I wish the best for you Singer and I hope things turn around for you.

-Kaiyote

[sweetiepye in reply to Kaiyote_Kirigaya]

Very insightful and so true for so many of us.

[tuttibye]

I don't feel angry when I do things for myself I just feel that there are more important things to be done, I don't view myself as a high priority in my own life. I agree with lilaclil it's a form of self-harm. I feel empowered when I can help someone I almost feel like a completely different person but when it comes to helping myself my anxiety takes hold and I just fall to pieces.

[sweetiepye]

Yes it was aimed at you and was sincerely meant.

[sweetiepye]

Thank you