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Help, I need answers!

nobodyknowsmylyfe profile image

Hello.. I don't want to say my name but I need a few answers. I'm really concerned now that my liver might be failing because of my recent mistakes. Over the past year I overdosed 5 times on Tylenol, advil and then my celexa,.. I never told anybody and I just rode out the horrible after effects, vommiting, not being able to walk, can't see straight, dizziness, and ringing in the ears.

I recently had overdosed twice on Effexor, and then Amitriptyline...

And now even after two months I still feel the effects, I can't eat right anymore... so much pain in my upper abdomen.. nausea... constantly feeling that I'm always not feeling well, also  confussion and I'm always tired now..

I get very painful cramps near my stomach and then on my right side..

I just don't want to go to a doctor because they will send me back to a behavioral hospital once again. And I regret what I have done..

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14 Replies

Hi it is possible you have done some damage,  but then again it might be totally unrelated.   Go to your doctors - you don't have to say what you have done do you?   I understand you don't want to go back but it is better than dying or doing long term damage that might lead to an early death.   x

nobodyknowsmylyfe profile image
nobodyknowsmylyfe in reply to

I'm just scared but then again,.. I kind of want to just let my mistakes kill me.

No matter how many times, I always end up relapsing and doing it even worse..it used to be a few pills, but now its just bottles.

I also have severe migraines, that occur daily so I've already been hooked on painkillers that way too..

BettyA profile image
BettyA

Please, do go to the dr... I admire that you very honestly and freely admit to your over-dosing...and you ARE sorry...so its time to forgive yourself....you deserve that and owe that to yourself. I believe you ARE determined to do the right thing...but you MUST go to the dr...please.... Do as coughalot said to do...sounds good to me... and keep taking good care of yourself... If your 'history' comes up at your visit...tell them what you have told us...you are taking responsibility...!!! that is a wonderful thing and I think they will like that about you! :) I do!! Best wishes to you!

EPHK profile image
EPHK

You must feel really lost; it sounds to me that at times you want things to work out and you want to make an effort to be happier and in control, yet, other times it all gets too much and you lose hope. You are definitely experiencing a lot of pain and what you call "mistakes" happened because of that pain; if you were happy you wouldn't have overdosed, would you? I am not saying that it was the right thing to do, there are plenty of ways to manage pain and you need someone to show you. Talk to your GP and/or your local branch of MIND about your options for counselling. You may feel apprehensive talking to your GP re: overdosing in case he/she "labels" you yet once more. However, you need tests done to see your liver functions. Perhaps, you may pay the doctor a visit and talk about your symptoms without getting into any further details. You have the right to mention as much or as little as you wish. All the Best, I hope it goes well.

Please don't feel this way. I did for years but life is worth it.

I think you need to get yourself to the doctors asap. They will help you! They will probably send you for a blood test to check your liver function and then you will get the results a few days later.

Message me if you ever want to talk. I love a good chat x

Hi nobody, you really are somebody, You seem like an ambivalent  suicide to me. You've certainly picked an ineffective method. I think you are either punishing yourself or making a cry for help.You should have your liver tested, you don't need to mention the overdose just say you take a lot of pain killers for your migraines. You do need to deal with your feelings about yourself. Most of us look at our negative traits instead of our good ones. I look in the mirror and see my big nose when I could be noticing I have nice eyes.I'm not trying to make light of your situation, just to get you to see we all have these weird ideas about ourselves.Suicide is like running away from your problem, instead embrace it. This is what you've got to work with. You are a big lump of clay and you can work on yourself as much or as little as you like Start with one little thing and when that's accomplished go on to the next. Before you know it you'll be a work of art .    

Why are you being prescribed Celbrex, and Amitiptylene ?

Have you been given a prognosis ? for joint problems ?

The reason I ask is several medications can cause you problems if not taken properly.

As with the other drugs can affect your tummy and that would cause the symptoms you explain, on top of low move

I understand why you  may not want to visit our GP although I would have thought you would need to attend your for medications and conditions.

Basically I would suggest you talk to your Doctor about your mood as He will know about your overdoses and expect to hear from you. The AD you are taking can be prescribed for other health issues and It can cause Health problems that are not associated with depression, there are better medications for this I feel

It is very important to make that appointment as you seem at risk

BOB

Hello

Suicide is not an answer here, I tried several years ago and still living with the consequences as far as my condition is concerned. Medications are not a good tool either as the ways they bring you back are painful and you will suffer the side affects for several months afterwards. Hence to feelings you are having at this time.

There is a further reason I look at medications as a bad way to go, in some cases the Hospital will do all to save you then after several days your body will break down caused by the drugs, the treatment is nasty as is the death you could have several days afterwards.

You will loose the trust of family and friends and the anger from family will be intense as will their resentment that you were unable to trust them and talk of your concerns

If you feel you want to end your life again consider going into either a police station or A and E and request that you are put in a place of safety. They should be able to help.

Talk to your GP watever you have done in the past will be recorded there and your GP will treat you with understanding.

BOB

I don't want to go back to a behavioral hospital though,

And celexa- and amitriptyline, are both for my depression.. same with effexor.

Idk.. I want to get help for my body, my mind is getting better

in reply to nobodyknowsmylyfe

Hello again, sorry misnaming one of your medications

May I ask why you feel they will send you back to behaviour Clinic ? What was your prognosis and why are you so worried about readmittance, ??

You must understand if you are trying to commit suicide that in itself needs looking into, it may be your GP will follow a different prognosis and pathway, It may be your medication can be changed as there are many AD out there that will do a better job

In m case they are going to remove  Amitriptyline from my medication list.

How does your physical illness affect you ? even this problem you have will need to be looked into ?, you could suggest I suppose it is that and that alone the reason why you need too see your GP in this case. We all need to visit the Surgery when we have non-related problems to our chronic condition.

BOB

in reply to nobodyknowsmylyfe

Hi your mind is not getting better if you keep taking overdoses is it?  You say you regret it in 1 breath then you say you know you will do it again.   It has also become a habit - a very dangerous one which you must try and break.   You are playing cat and mouse with your life.

I know of a young man who massively od'd on paracetomol.  He ended up in hospital where they saved his life and he was very grateful as he realised he didn't want to die.  Unfortunately he had done such liver damage that he did die.  It took 3 days.  

This could be you one day.   Scary isn't it?   Please seek help.  x

I've taken 5 over doses in the past when I was younger first one was at 12 Later I actually overdosed on effexor, 2 months worth which were 250mgs or 225mg. I am not sure how I survived. That was in my 20s. I think you need to look at what it is that makes you reach for the pills. Is it that you are anxious? You think others dislike you? I don't know the ins and outs of your life but I had high anxiety levels and just couldn't connect with people and went from highs to lows but was aware I never fitted in. Eventually I got a private diagnosis of Aspergers in my 30s. That answered a lot for me. You have to find a way to take over your illness not let it take over you. I know when you are numb and in the middle of it all nothing makes any sense and you don't even understand yourself. But getting your body healthy is part of that. You could have something else physical going on that has never even been looked at.

If you do think there is something physical wrong, go to the doctors and explain. It could be something completely in unrelated. Even if it isn't you need to find a way to just get it seen to.  

Also Effexor is not(in my oppinion) a great anti depressant I was put up to the highest dose of this as the effects kept wearing off and I would become low. Each time it was increased by 50mg at a time and I eventually just sank low again and felt suicidal. Ask for a change in meds if you still feel suicidal on them. If not then that's a bonus.

Ive always felt suicidal on any anti depressant I was ever put on, even if they increased the dosage. My therapist mainly says that the reason I always went towards pills over and over is because I was used to taking painkillers and my brain has caused an addiction out of it. Also because of my impulsive control disorder and I act without thinking... I don't even want to live, I have no reason to what so ever..

Also life is just a stupid cycle we go to school to get to another school and to be stuck with a job the rest of our lives so we could have money to support a family and to restart the cycle all over again.. its so stupid.

Elaine666 profile image
Elaine666

Hi nobodyknowsmylyfe,

Congrads on starting to tell people about you life. Your life is nothing to be shame of. Your problem is called drug abuse, one of issues related to mental health. You know, if something has an official name, that means quite a few people have it.

You know you are better than what? You are better that heroin takers. I mean you are not too bad. You just didn't understand you need help, but haven't found the right one.

I overdosed on painkillers, and should have cure the cause of the pain rather than a temporal solution. How about this, get a X-ray of your liver first, anyhow this is the most concerns you right now.

Think simple, I find it works. If you were afraid of your liver, check your liver. Oh also tell others your life if you got time.

Warmest regards,

Elaine

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