I am 61 years old and I suffer with retrograde ejaculation, which means I cum very little and it's having a devastating effect on my sex life. To put it simply, what should be the climax, the best part of the sexual experience is the opposite of that and instead a feeling of being inadequate. The result is that I can become sexually aroused but as the climax approaches lose the desire and the ability to go on because I know the outcome. I've tried telling myself that its not that important but it doesn't work, I don't have the confidence to have sex with anyone and even with myself only manage it once every three weeks or so. I saw my Dr about it and he wasn't understanding, giving me a prescription for Viagra. It seems there is no cure for this problem and the only thing I can do is write this message and hope that any feedback it gets makes me feel better about the problem. If I could only persuade myself to see it as something which is not that important as most other people would I might enjoy having sex again.
retrograde ejaculation: I am 61 years... - Men's Health Foru...
retrograde ejaculation
You on any meds mate?
I'm on anti-depressants and blood pressure lowering tablets but I only started using them since this problem, (retrograde ejaculation) started.
Ah ok, check side effects just to be sure, I take blood pressure lowering tablets & one called tamsulosin n I suffer retro at times
Hi dnro
Retrograde ejaculation is a pain
I have it but I had prostate op so am permanently retrograde
If you haven't had any surgery then it's medication
Tamsolosin is the main one
Go on line and check side effects of all your meds
Good luck and keep us posted
I'd like to know more about kegels
Squeeze your muscles like you are trying to restrict your flow or flex your erection. Using these muscles I have relearned to ejaculate after TURP and RE. See my previous response.
The condition can be from drugs taken or from prostate surgery. The former is solved by stopping the drugs. The latter may be permanent depending on damage done to muscle in the urethra.
If you don’t plan to father more babies, it’s of no consequence
I wish I could see it as 'of no consequence'
Obviously it’s important to you as it is to me when I suffer with same, don’t give up try an alternative gp n discuss with them mate
How have your thoughts about retrograde ejaculation changed, if any, since your post three months ago? I am experiencing the same thing.
I'm trying to get used to it, it's this problem, the way it affects my self confidence and the fact that I'm 61 which make's me feel disinclined to look for a physical relationship with someone.
I’m 66, and I’m finding that it is much less of a problem than I imagined. You are much more than just the fluid that you can no longer see or feel. 
Retrograde ejac can be cause buy surgery or certain weak muscles, dry orgasm are caused by medications or shooting to many loads in and hour
I totally understand where your coming from I also have retrograde ejaculation I'm only 46 an it's destroyed me I can't get my head round it at all I was fine until I had a operation year an half ago now when I come it's not the same pleasure as before it's soul destroying for me. How did your retrograde ejaculation come about??
Hi Jay. Read your story from 8 MTHS ago Can I ask if things are getting better
Hope so. Caravan Al
No not really maybe a little bit Al I'm looking at going to Turkey for a operation that mite fix this problem Collagen injections into the bladder neck I'm on imipramine at the moment 3 time's a day but still not happened properly for me hopefully the operation can fix this.
It was triggered by a particularly energetic sexual experience, also I'm a diabetic and I've heard we're more likely to have this problem. Sex just isn't the same for me since it happened.
Sex is totally different with RE. I can relate. Due to a TURP in My 30s I experienced RE. Never been the same.
Hi. Read your story with sympathy. I'm 71. After an op on my prostate I was left with same problem. I was in hospital with sepsis after an enlarged prostate and not being able to pee
Pain was terrible. Said to myself that as long as I can pee again normally I can accept anything else
As I said after the op I cannot cum as before. Dry cum is not the same
It's a natural thing for a guy to see the spunk However after 18mths I am getting used to it.
I only hope it gets better for you
Reading about other guys certainly helps
Take care
Hi pal. Just read your story. I'm 71 and have RE like you. I had enlarged prostate and had turp procedure. I see no cum at all when I ejaculate. It's taken me 18 months to come to terms and only now enjoy masturbating again. As a guy it's so natural to see our cum then all of a sudden it's gone. It's not the same and never will be but it's getting better. Hope it is same for you. It's good we can share our thoughts isn't it. Take care. Al.
Hi. I'm just wondering how was the load before the enlarged prostate when you couldn't pee anymore? I'm 54 and last year I couldn't pee anymore and ended up in the emergency room which I left with a catheter for a while. Up to that point peeing was very restricted an so was what came out after masturbating. I then got the urolift procedure and peeing works great but as far as the load there's almost nothing shooting out anymore. It seems difficult to get a orgasm too. Tell me your experience if you want.
Thanks
Good morning Pal
Before my trouble starting I was pretty much normal getting up in the night once or twice but peeing normally. I was away on holiday and talking to friends my age was saying I'm coming to the age of 70 and never been in hospital and not even having stitches for anything. Drove home and felt like peeing. NOTHING came out.
Foolishly I waited thinking it'll pass and be ok. Then the pain was bloody awful. Got a taxi to hospital and within an hour was catheterised and treated for sepsis. My bladder filled then not being able to go started to fill my kidneys hence the infection.
All cleared up but remained on catheter for 4 months then a TURP procedure. I don't regret the op as it's so natural to pee normally. We take things for granted. I am single and only sex is with my hand. I enjoy it. However after approx 55 yes of seeing cum then nothing gets a lot of getting used to. I am just about accepting it now.
My orgasm is good but does take a while to do the job. Never get hard much without Viagra.
I suppose after sepsis I am lucky things are reasonable so I am ok
Hope time will help you.
Take care. Al
Thanks for the response. I guess I have to accept that after a certain age it's not the same anymore I tried Cialis once but got heart beats from it and had to stop.
I have the same thing going on as you described. I'm 54. Hopefully it gets better.
Do you know what has caused your retrograde ejaculation? Mine was induced by the tamsulosin I take because of my enlarged prostate.
Hi
Sorry for delay
I was prescribed tam after my enlarged prostate diagnosis
After a month sometimes I would cum normal other times retrograde
When I had pre med for forthcoming op Turps I was told that I may go retrograde
At that point I just wanted to pee normally instead of catheters
So from then on I only cum retrograde
It takes a while to adjust but it does get better to accept
Getting hard is my problem
I can try for an hour and still soft I do have sildenafil 100g which I break into two
I get hard and can wank 3 or 4 times throughout the day
One tip before I leave. If you are self catheterizing save a few for emergency
After my experience I am so scared to be in the same situation so to keep a spare catheter at least you can release the pressure
Hope all this makes sense
It's easier to talk
Having said that I am pleased we have this forum to share our thoughts and problems
Take care my friend
Alan
Fortunately no catheter yet!
Hi Tam user
You're quick to reply
I guess you can pee ok so no need for catheters. Good. If you do go down that path and you are offered to self catheter as apposed to indwelling one go for it
I said no at first as I didn't think I could self catheter but it is so easy and far better
Keep us posted with your journey
Best wishes. Alan
I can pee ok since starting tamsulosin and luckily I don’t have to get up to pee several times per night. It’s just the side effects of the drug I struggle with.
I’m 63. Not quite sure how that happened.
I'm fairly late to the conversation, however, I'd still like to add my story.
I was around 54 and having difficulty starting to pee. No problem actually urinating, just getting started. I blame decades of holding too long.
Anyway, I was prescribed Tamsulosin and was warned that R.E. is a possible side effect.
Yes, it did happen.
For me, at that time I wasn't bothered. I did orgasm as before, it didn't take more or less time and during solo sessions there was no cleanup. It was my wife that didn't like the fact that I didn't produce anything when she played with me.
I stopped the Tamsulosin and resumed ejaculating with similar conditions to before starting the drug.
I have always had a 'try it and see' attitude to my medications. One of my consultants has complimented me several times on my attitude. If I reckon that the side effects are worse than the original problem, I will stop the drugs and see what happens. If I'm overall better off then I don't restart them.
I inform my GP after the fact and they log it in my records. I have not yet had to go back on to any of the drugs that I have come off.
Let me be clear, I am NOT suggesting that you stop your drugs without your consultants approval. What I do is not a reccomendation.
What I will suggest though is talking to your consultant about the problem and asking if he has any recommendations. Perhaps other treatments?
Best of luck
Well I've been to Turkey had the procedure and I'm still in the same position as before RE I'm totally at a loss to where to go from here this is having a massive impact on my life not being able to cum my sexlife is massively diminished it's really getting to me this I can't put in to words how much! It just feels like nobody understands my GP and the Urologist are useless.
Sorry to hear things didn't go right for youI have RE and took me two yes to accept the situation
It's not normal is it mate
Regret to say all we can do it talk about through the forum and know we are not alone
I still try to wank every day
Getting hard is my problem
It will get better. Promise
Can I ask. Are you single as I found it was better to physically share with another guy and occasionally we wank together
It helps w
No I'm not single I have a gorgeous girlfriend who I love the world which makes this even harder to come to terms with that I can't have that intimacy with her.
I have experienced RE for several years after two TURP 's. I experienced the same sense of loss as others stated. Over the years I have learned to appreciate my new type of orgasm . After all, each one is different. I have also tuned into the feelings inside as I ejaculated and have learned to "push" it out. Sometimes it is pee, and some times cum, and feels excellent. Listen to your body and play with it from inside using your muscles. My brother reported similar results. I am 70 and thankful to be urinating normally, waking with an erection and enjoying an active and enjoyable sex life. Do I miss my cum? Yes. But....
I had the same problem with my doctor, after finding the courage to talk to him about my retrograde ejaculation he was dismissive and fobbed me of with a prescription for Viagra. It seems there is no cure for it.
Post surgery. TURP
We need to start a blog or website for men who suffer in silence from RE. ITS real abs it is painful.
That's a great idea jaxman how can we go about this?
I tried every exercise and supplement there was to fix my retrograde ejaculation but nothing worked, there did not seem to be any cause for it. I had been on mild blood pressure medicine but the specialist said it could not be that. Then somebody gave me a 'RECUMBENT EXERCISE BIKE' I IMMEDIATELY NOTICED RESULTS. They are not easy to use but they target all the right muscles that no other exercise equipment can. I'm glad to say I'am back to normal.
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