Hey there :): My boyfriend was diagnosed with... - Meningitis Now

Meningitis Now

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Hey there :)

Teneal_ profile image
6 Replies

My boyfriend was diagnosed with Bacterial Meningitis in February of this year. After spending 9days in hospital he was released having to remember how to negotiate his life. It is now 8 months later and still he is not himself. There are good days then bad day.. and then very bad days. Sometimes he doesn't recognize me when I'm sitting next to him. Sometimes he'll fall asleep and not know where he is when he wakes up, this makes him feel axious.

He is 19 years old and he is working. I can see how much this is taking from him. He has resigned but will still work till end november. We've been together almost a year and a half and I can't imagine living without him. I am 20 years old and still studying. This has taken its toll on our relationship and I am unsure on how to help him. Sometimes I get frustrated and hurt and we talk about it but I know it's not his fault.

I want to know how I can help him and what lifestyle changes we can make to help him recover. I am trying to be as patient as I can and I know there is still a long road ahead of us but I know we'll be in this together.

If anyone has advice it would be much appreciated.

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Teneal_ profile image
Teneal_
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6 Replies
ICUBMcoma profile image
ICUBMcoma

Be there for him, reassure that you’ll be there to listen 👂 to him and only listen.

Help him find possible on campus guidance support if there is such a service.

He needs tools to learn how to deal with the new major challenges and changes ,that come as results of this super sneaky insidious illness, that hangs out in your blind spot just waits to attack.

Mainly take it a day at a time. Be prepared for anything and everything.

By the way you are doing an amazing job with everything on your plate.

Also remember to go to the movies, and or play games and or anything and everything that has nothing to do with being sick. You both are new to this new life!’ There are no right or wrong answers, he’s on an emotional roller coaster.

So are you!!!

ICUBMcoma profile image
ICUBMcoma in reply to ICUBMcoma

Take it easy on yourself.

Enjoy being with each other

😊❤️Rebecca

spouseM profile image
spouseM

The advise I have is to be kind and patient, with yourself and him. My husband and I laugh at some of the strange things he does as he recovers. We do this because the fact is that reality is this, right now. We try to accept that. Something he has done is sing a silly song as a "welcome" for something at the dinner table before he eats it. This is not at all like him before. We laugh about this together, knowing how very strange it is, and we get on with whatever we are doing. Thankfully it is nothing that gets in his way of functioning, but is the new him. Embracing the new him, the new you is important. If you choose to walk together toward the future, this will make it easier.

My very best to you....

Susieny profile image
Susieny

Hi,

I had BM in April and still having symptoms. My advise to you is to continue supporting him and have patience . Sometimes , to alleviate the symptoms , there is no remedy . It becomes very frustrating . I write this today with a head that feels it weighs more than my body does ! No medication can help that . It sounds like you are doing a wonderful job in supporting him . Laughter is wonderful as is sleep . Keep life rather simple for now. I used to be very sociable , but now I prefer alone time . Quiet is best for the BM patient .

Welcome to the blog . Keep us posted on his recovery and don't neglect yourself .

Susie NY

David-A-B profile image
David-A-B

Be there for him yes. Listen to him. Looking back through my bacterial Menningitis l had alot if mood swings in my revovery.

Take time for yourself. And rememver it is not him but the injury that is why he is the way he is.

In time things will get clearer.

For me l returned to work 2 to 3 months too early. That made me tired and frustrated as l was not the same person l was before.

I fould as my strength grew l loved being outside walking. It gave me time to reflect and think and helped me realise what is important in life.

I am 14 months on and although better l still suffer memory loss and sometimes need quiet time to myself.

Everyone is different and the recovery is different. I wish you both the best in your future.

Teneal_ profile image
Teneal_

Thank you to everyone who has replied and given me some reassurance. My boyfriend is being booked into hospital tomorrow because of how is feeling. I am busy with exams and I am quite stressed with everything that is going on.

I am happy that he is being booked in because in this way he can be helped and examined to see if there is something still bothering and how we can help him heal and recover.

This has been a very long journey and I know he is not always motivated but I think this will be a good thing.

I hope everything is fine and that there are no injuries remaining in his brain and nervous system.

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