wife: my husband has been diagnosed with... - Lung Cancer Support

Lung Cancer Support

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jeanemarie profile image
13 Replies

my husband has been diagnosed with stage 4 non-small cell lung cancer. he is pretty grouchy and hard to get along with..i know he is sick, but it gets unbearable sometimes. I try to help him, but he thinks I am telling him what to do. how can I help him better? he has had one bout of chemo. the dr. postponed the next because of kidney failure what is normal? this is getting pretty hard. thanks, jeane

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jeanemarie profile image
jeanemarie
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13 Replies
Terrygillespie profile image
Terrygillespie

I know this is hard but he is adjusting to his diagnosis. It takes time to accept and we can be very hard to live with! Give him time

jeanemarie profile image
jeanemarie in reply to Terrygillespie

i am trying. i feel really alone tho.  thanks you

Don450sl profile image
Don450sl

Everyone responds differently to getting cancer. I am a stage 4 lung cancer survivor and my girlfriend had small cell lung cancer. I cared for her during her battle with lung cancer, 24/7 for the last few months. It is the hardest, but most rewarding thing I have even done. Try to keep his wishes in mind and keep him comfortable, it can get hard sometimes. I had to remember when Penny would get frustrated with me it was the cancer and the medication. I know deep down she appreciated everything I did for her. Stay strong. ((hugs))

 

jeanemarie profile image
jeanemarie

did she chose chemo? i can't even think  of what the other alternative is. its pretty overwhelming. he just got out of the hospital with kidney failure, so thats another setback. they have postponed his next chemo for a week so he can get better.  thank you so much. i knew this would be hard, but i feel so damn bad for him! thanks..hugs to you also

Rivertown3 profile image
Rivertown3 in reply to jeanemarie

I had to stop chemo and switch to immunotherapy because kidney failure was happening. See if Opdivo is available for his type of cancer. I have had wonderful results and I feel great. I have found some sleeping meds can make me depressed. I had to change to another kind. I was blaming it on the Opdivo and it wasn't that at all. I also take 1/2 of a .25 mg Xanax in the morning and the other half at night. By all means talk to his doctors about his anger. 

55diveme profile image
55diveme in reply to jeanemarie

Look up baking soda cure for cancer 

611935 profile image
611935

My husband has stage 3 uper lobe right lung spread to lymph nodes in chest, I try with making healthy diet of veg, fruit, protein, nuts and dairy like yougert. My problem is the adult children think stopping by macdonalds for a greasy hamburger is a treat for him. I am a cancer survivor so I know how important diet is in the healing process.

They do not think I know what I'm talking about, they think time left, they don't think in turns of getting well.

611935 profile image
611935 in reply to 611935

Don't try so hard, relax as much as you can.

gibdonnalee profile image
gibdonnaleeCommunity Superhero in reply to 611935

Hi 611935, I know it can be so frustrating. My kids are always questioning the doctors and don't think I am taking care of myself. I have stage 3 carcinoid lung cancer, right middle lung removed in 2014. Was In remission but doc thinks it's back. I do have a hard time eating right, it's like I get in the I don't give a s--- mood. All you can do is try to do what you can. It sounds like your doing your best. I'm sure the kids mean well, it's hard on everybody. 

Memaw0100 profile image
Memaw0100

I was diagnosed right after my brother died with it, just 2 days later. It also claimed my Mom in '89. I'm sure, as with me, fear is a big part of his mood. Even though I had part of a lung removed and did chemo, I still live in a state of panic. It has been over 2 years. Just give him time!

Jhecho profile image
Jhecho

Also have lung cancer - no surgery but ended with COPD do you have to that

Judylmac profile image
Judylmac

When taking chemo and having "contrast" with tests  a person can go into kidney  failure unless they drink lots of water.  It is hard to do...especially when feeling nausea and generally  down.  Have faith and pray with, and for, your husband everyday.  Wish I could help more but you both need to stay strong and positive.God bless you.

tclementi profile image
tclementi

Hi jeane, I know this is a hard thing- my parents went through the same thing when my mom had cancer. Patient Power's co-founders Andrew and Esther are a husband and wife team that went through cancer as well and you might be encouraged by their story here- patientpower.info/lung-cancer Hope this helps! -Theresa

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