So tired of my anxiety.: Hi, I just feel... - Living with Anxiety

Living with Anxiety

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So tired of my anxiety.

Hi, I just feel like I need to vent for a minute. I'm so tired of my anxiety. I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels this way, but it still hurts. I started having anxiety in middle school, and was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder in high school. However, I do remember what I was like as a kid pre-anxiety, and I miss that. I'm tired of waking up every day with anxiety, and not always knowing why. I miss being more care-free and not having the anxiety that I struggle with every single day, and the bottom line is that I guess I'm just sad. I'm tired of feeling like I have to apologize for my mental illness. Every so often, people in my life will say, "What happened to you?" You never used to worry like this." I guess I just used to be better at hiding my anxiety. Sorry for the mood of this post, but every so often I feel like I'm mourning the loss of who I used to be. Thank you to anyone who took the time to read this.

6 Replies

i know exactly how you feel, i've been dealing with anxiety for about 7 years now, i just wanted to tell you that you shouldn't mourn the loss of who you used to be, simply because that care free pre-anxiety kid is still there waiting for the fog to dissipate, i know it might sound cheesy but there's a light at the end of the gloomy tunnel :)

it's ok to feel overwhelmed, and it's normal to have vulnerable moments, we're only humans, but never underestimate the power within you, what i'm trying to say is : yes there is bad days! But guess what....a bad day only means that a good day is ahead, that's how i get myself out of a difficult day, i tell myself ''Smile, because this sadness i'm feeling right now is announcing a better day ahead, i acknowledge how i feel, than i breath through it, and i realize i can't feel down forever! it will pass.. and i try to shift my focus on something i'm grateful for...and than maybe cry a bit :P ..overall, the main thing is to work on acknowledging how you feel at the moment you feel it, don't fight it, than bring your focus back on something that puts a smile on your face :)

in reply to sabysab

Thank you so much for this! I'm going to remember it for sure. I've been trying to stay in the moment more too, and acknowledge my anxiety. I have good days and bad days as well, but I guess I've just been struggling with it for so long that sometimes it's hard to believe I'll ever feel any different. On those bad days, I feel isolated, misunderstood, and weighed down by my anxiety. Worst of all, I feel like this mental illness will keep me from becoming the person I've always wanted to be.

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sabysab in reply to

you're not alone :)...there's a way to overcome this, other than popping pills and suffering in silence, i'm tired of taking medication, i decided to look for other alternatives, my body can't take the side effects anymore, and during that process i realized the power of our mind! ...i'm still dealing with panic attacks, and anxious peaks, but overall, every step towards my "meds free goal" makes me learn more about myself and how to manage it...i'll be more than happy to share my journey

in reply to sabysab

Thank you :)

Afternoon Sunsetsky217,

Why are you apologizing?!! We all feel the same way you do. No need to apologize at all. This isn’t something we picked out. It’s just the “hot mess” we are dealt with. This is why we all need support. If we had this disorder or not. You are strong. We deal with stuff the average person doesn’t deal with. To be honest with you this “hot mess” is definitely a 💩 sandwich.

But we work through it.The best way I deal with it is try to have a sense of humor about it. I look myself straight in the mirror and I say “I’m not scared of you today MF!! 😂😂😂😂 Everyday we step into the spotlight and cope with this 💩.It is a battle, but you don’t have to battle this alone. Keep your head up and always try to enjoy your life.

in reply to

Thank you for your response and support. :) I guess sometimes I feel like I have to apologize because the people around me make me feel like this is a choice, even though they know I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder. I know it's probably because they can't really comprehend what I deal with everyday, but I have a lot of guilt about how my anxiety is impacting those around me. Often I don't know what else to say anymore to make them understand other than, "I'm sorry." Going to try and keep my head up in those really tough moments, and not let myself get too caught up in that guilt.

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