so fed up!

hi guys been a while

wish I could say its because I have recovered my relapse of crippling anxiety but that would be a lie..

its been 2 months of on going anxiety battles and im tired of it!

really down..

tried fluxoitine had a reverse reaction ended up at a&e suicidal and under the crisis team! I wouldn't act upon my thoughts I have to much to leave..

just gets on top of you eh?

then had x2 uti's (nice)

a mouth abscess

and now hay fever that is causing throat tightening setting my anxiety sky high!! Went drs today she prescribed me antihistamines and boom! A reverse reaction to them too! Honestly why is life so cruel??

im trying so hard to be normal do normal things!

I am unemployed as couldn't keep down my new job!

so doing voluntary at my old job at the care home doing ladies and gents nails etc

was doing really well but now I have hit a wall!

im taking mirtazipine 45mg at night

and propranolol up to 30mg a day! If needed

I will take a 5mg of diazepam if in dire need.

I have rang or had a drs appointment nearly every week for 2 months I feel like a pain in the bum and a hypochondriac my mental health is a constant battle and I need loads of reassurance that things are normal but theses new meds etc have been sending me mad!!

you know people wish to win the lotto? I wish to be anxiety free...

2 Replies

  • Hi , you remind me so much I ended up in AE year ago or so got diazepam to literally knock me out to sleep and relax my body. I could do with it now last month or so having only describe has a ibs flare up. It's so hard wit a little boy. Iv got a sleep aid I'm going to take it tonight. Iv got work in the morning and 4 days to go. I'm in a mess. I go away for 2 weeks and feeling anxious feeling like this. All I know when I get bank of still feeling like this I gotta do something about it. Maybe get some medication. Binkynoo

  • Hello powsy1983

    Sorry things are not good for you at the moment

    I know you said you could not keep your job down but what a positive that you are doing some Volunteer work , well done you :-)

    Rather than feel you are in a constant battle if maybe you could try and accept you are not well at the moment like you would if there was anything else physically wrong it will take some of the pressure of that you are feeling so weighed down with at the moment

    I totally can relate about having reactions to medications I am very sensitive with meds to which does not help bit again you have some strength deep down because you keep trying them and hopefully there will be one that will suite you :-)

    Never feel you are a nuisance especially towards seeing the Doctor , remember that is their job and they do get paid to do it and without people going they would be out of a job so you have nothing at all to feel bad about needing to go and check in with them

    I know you mentioned reassurance and I totally understand that to the only problem with needing it and I know from experience is that it can wear of quick once we have been reassured and then we need more and we can't always get it when we need it and I imagine you will have had therapy of some kind but if you have and you have not felt it has worked or if you have not had any yet either way push to be referred again because therapy when it does work will give you the tools to use when you are feeling down and you will be able to let go of needing to be reassured

    People do understand in these Communities just how this feels so you always have somewhere to come and talk and I hope that helps even in a small way :-)


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