im struggling with life at the moment and i feel like ending it. My friend recommended to speak to you guys and now i feel like this is my last chance.Nothing is going right for, my grades are above average however i feel like i'm never good enough, my parents never show any sign of being proud.In school this year they made GCSES much harder so a new C is the same marks and score as an old A this extra pressure is getting to me an i'm am struggling. My social life is pretty much non existent and i usually get 4-5 hours sleep at night which makes school mornings hard. On 01/12/15 i did attempt to kill myself by overdosing but all i did was pass out which was a slight joy for me because i think i got more than 8 hours sleep. I have to wear a long sleeve shirt 24/7 because of the cuts on my arm and i also have cuts on my thighs. My eating pattern is broken because i usually forget to eat and when i do eat its mostly me being forced to eat by a friend. I am considering suicide and i know you are going to say i'm not alone but i feel like the end is near and i'm sort of happy about it. i have already written a note just in case i get brave enough and do it. I know my life is going to end and hopefully it will be soon. I feel really unmotivated and in sum aspects it is effecting my school especially last week when i tried to tell my maths teacher why i couldn't hand my homework; the reason was because i was cutting my arm on my desk and the blood covered the desk, But i told him i didn't do it and in response i was shouted at which didn't help my low confidence level. P.E is hard not from a physical stand point, the reason why its hard is because i'm not allowed to wear long sleeves which means i have my cuts on show and some were still bleeding, all i could here is dirty comments on how i wanted attention but the truth was i wanted the complete opposite of attention. this has been going on for the last 11 month and i'm running out of time.
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