Hi my names Cat, where to start and what to say, I'm sat here crying all because someone I never knew died and is on the news. Im 23 and my boyfriend died when I was just turned 17, unexplained circumstances, they dont know what happened except that he was electrocuted for no reason. It was my last week of exams at college and I think on and off since I've been a mess. I've moved on but still find myself hating my life, all thats become of it and find that im a very bitter person, with not a high tolerance of people, jealously has also become a friend that I hate but cant help but feel. I guess any thing can set me off with "going back to the old days" I also cant talk about it as I dont think i have a reason to feel soo much pain for something that happened soo long ago. And its not often, I can go years without really thinking anything but lately everything feels bleek and I feel stuck and a burden. I wont do anything necessarily, Ive dealt with a parent being depressed since they were a child and would never want anyone to have to deal with that, although my anger has gotten quite bad lately, always had a temper but even getting in the car to drive is an ordeal. I also think have a mild form of OCD, probably had it since i was a kid if i was diagnosed but it doesnt affect my life too much anymore. Apart from that I dont know what else to say. I guess if im writing this im looking for some guidance.
Sorry If I posted this in the wrong area.