Donor eggs: Hello! My first post šŸ˜‰ on... - Infertility Support

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Donor eggs

leo1980 profile image
leo1980
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Hello! My first post šŸ˜‰ on here. After 4 unsuccessful cycles: 24 eggs retrieved and only 3 Poor quality 5 day blastocysts. I think itā€™s time I moved on to the donor route. We have mild male factor issues too. What questions should I be asking? What am I looking for in a donor? Ie someone who has kids or someone who hasnā€™t? Should we go abroad? Or use a clinic in London? I hear there are long waiting lists. Can anyone recommend a clinic with a more diverse range of donors? Thank you!

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leo1980 profile image
leo1980
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Triplets_mom profile image
Triplets_mom

Hiya! I haven't got any information regarding DE, as I've not gone that route before.

However, I'm here to encourage you and let you know you're not alone hun. šŸ„°šŸ¤—I'm hopeful you'll get the much needed information as you proceed. Best of luck. X

Loraine7 profile image
Loraine7

You should find strength to pull yourself together. Egg donation offers high success rates in women as the quality of donor eggs is considerably high. Thus you might have heard about mitochondrial donation used with IVF, right? For your own peace of mind, I recommend that you ask for a second medical opinion. As donor-egg IVF might be an expensive procedure if done in the home area. We had to travel abroad to bio texcom and seek help there. Mainly 'cause of their ā€œguaranteed'ā€ plan. We've signed up for all-inclusive. ā€œGuaranteeā€ means a live birth or money refund. This was really our last resort. Ended up with successful pregnancy. Wishing you the best of luck on your way.

SerrineV profile image
SerrineV in reply to Loraine7

I'm adding. Egg donors go through a very stringent psychological evaluation. The clinic's main job is to build a profile of the donor from every angle. Including personality, intellectual capabilities, motivation, level of responsibility, and health background. Their questions during the initial interview cover the donorā€™s education history and grade point average and her familyā€™s professional background. They ask the donor to describe her personality traits: Is she talkative, shy, confident, caring etc. Many potential donors do not make the cut in bio texcom. Women who smoke, use illicit drugs, or consume excessive amounts of alcohol are immediately rejected! Psychological disorders are also a gray area. They will never accept a donor if she has been diagnosed with schizophrenia or severe manic depression. In other clinics the mild history of anxiety or depression usually does not preclude them from becoming donors. Other clinics just ask how many generations back it goes and whether theyā€™ve had an episode recently. It all goes into the report, and itā€™s up to the doctor to make the decision!! which is an absolute rubbish, I would never want my donor be a depressive one or sth of this kind. I'm glad the clinic takes extremelly precise look onto all those things.

SerrineV profile image
SerrineV

I understand your concerns. We chose Ukraine because the procedure is well regulated there. Lots of women participate in egg donation/surrogacy programs there. I'm not digging to the core reasons why though, the thing which is important is that, for example, our clinic has 600+ donor database and rising - The choice's never easy and will probably take you days. They developed so called 3D modeling technique. Meaning they take photos of the chosen donor and father, from all possible angles. Then with the help of a special program they superimpose the digital pics and get the image of the future kid! That's really awesome! Moreover, you can get to know more detailed facts from the donor profiles (Of course after signing the contract). If any questions, feel free to pm. Stay well.

lawrins profile image
lawrins

I'm sorry about your ivf failures. Forget about all those "what-ifs"! They're just making you nervous more and think about things which are not helpful at all! It's hard but try your best to think positively. I had 4 failed cycles. Each failure was awful and painful. I understand your confusion. This is so hard when you face infertility and nothing works. I was diagnosed with PCOS when I was 19 yo. I've been in treatment for years. Unfortunately zero results. I was lost. I didn't know what else to do to make it work. I was looking at my friends who were getting pregnant and having babies. I was constantly asking myself "Why me? Why does nothing work?" I've tried so hard. Each time I believed with my whole heart and soul that "this treatment will help for sure". And each failure was breaking me down completely. To be honest, sometimes I had thoughts to stop fighting and accept a childless life. After that We chose Ukraine because the procedure is well regulated there. Lots of women participate in egg donation/surrogacy programs there. This was really our last resort. Ended up with successful pregnancy. Wishing you the best of luck on your way.

Mel77 profile image
Mel77 in reply to lawrins

Hi there, hun. I understand how it feels. I remember myself being in these very shoes. Anyways, I'm hppy to hear you did it! I won't believe anyone who says IVF is a walk in the park. It's a hard way to pass. It's an incredible work of all the parts of the process. And, know what, I absolutely adore what egg donors/surrogates do for the infertile. Not without being paid, but I truly doubt if taking all those fertility meds might pass effortlessly. And to pay is the least we can do for them. Dh and me were through treatments too to get the baby into family. Once it even seemed the more we tried the further we got from our aims. Thankfully, we got to know BTC, where finally were helped. They recommended us using a "win-win" plan. Meaning success or money refund. Have nothing to regret about.Did you use surrogacy?

Mel77 profile image
Mel77

I'm not sure I can name the clinic here. That's why I'll simply provide some facts about it. Who knows, you may get interested. The thing which is really awesome is that they offer guaranteed treatment plans. Meaning they do not guarantee you a baby, but they'll try again and again until are successful. In case it doesn't happen within 5 shots. Or your body gets drained because of meds - you say Stop. In this case they refund money paid back. Just An alternative to have. Another point is their more affordable prices. All the contracts are available in pdf on their site. Besides one can have a free Skype call and ask all things needed directly. Their egg donor database is huge. One can easily find the best for treatment. Hope this helps. If any questions, feel free to ask. Good luck!

fay2399 profile image
fay2399

Hi Leo,Iā€™m moving to donor too... I am in Australia and we donā€™t have options here. So.. for donors they should have kids... is proof of their fertility but donā€™t know your other question!!

You have options for fresh eggs? I think thatā€™s better chance

Iā€™m too scared that frozen eggs wonā€™t work.

Cheers

alockie profile image
alockie

Hi, I have not undergone IVF DE so I can't share first hand experiences. However, I can recommend reading these posts: eggdonationfriends.com/7-qu... and eggdonationfriends.com/proc... which help you understand the process and you will know what questions you will need to ask to understand your chances and be sure you have picked the right clinic. Hope this helps. Good luck on your journey.

SerrineV profile image
SerrineV

When I was preparing for the following IVF cycle, seems I did everything I could. And at that very time my co-woker announced her pregnancy! It sounds terrible, but I almost felt like she hasnā€™t earned it. This was her very first try. No miscarriages or chemical pregnancies. No putting her body through the hot flashes and night sweats of depot Lupron or other autoimmune protocols like those painful Lovenox injections. No heartbreak when the beta comes back 1. Or worse, when itā€™s 23 and then vanishes. She was even able to genetically test her embryo. One PGD-normal embryo, one transfer, one pregnancy, one baby. It was hard for me to wrap my head around. Several of my friends have used IVF with OE and all have been successful. All of them over 45! years old. So my question was why not me?! Am I a horrible person? What did I do wrong? Should I have tried accupuncture for longer? Gluten free? Had more dairy? Those were the constant thoughts in my head..

Anyways, everyoneā€™s path is different. Dh and I ended up with surrogacy in BTC, Kyiv, successfully. This is the only thing which matters now.

All the best of luck on your ways.

andylins profile image
andylins

Firstly, I wish you all the best. If it's treatment, let it go smoothly and not bothering too much. We're passing IVF in Bio texcom (trying out their mitochondria replacement therapy). Have 1 shot under the belt. I'm ripe age. DX ā€“ POF, aged eggs. Dh is ok. Well, do not know your story but if it's similar to mine then I definitely am experienced on the point. The decision of using IVF came quite smoothly I should say as this was our only possible option. So had almost no moaning on the point. Am just still thinking about the donor anonymity issue in case no luck with own eggs..But I truly shouldn't now. But this seems to be not urgent just need to keep busy somehow until otd date. Itā€™s gonna be 14 days to get reassurance or not. We're absolutely satisfied with the whole process and regret nothing about using the place. Kind and supportive people they are, our doc more than pregnant herself ..This is so inspiring!!Sending you strong hugs and all positive vibes through your journey.

happyfrogg profile image
happyfrogg

Hi, myself I know ladies who have 1st time success using IVF DE in Polish clinic with no waiting times. If you might want to know more, pm.

andylins profile image
andylins

Thanks for sharing your story with us. We did it with 5 shots program using DE in Ukrainian clinic. You know, applying for treatment overseas is makes it definitely cheaper. Besides you can find some financially attractive offers. Ours for ex. went with the guarantee. Not actually with the guaranteed positive. But it was they were ready to refund money paid if it didn't work after 5 attempts. That time it was more than just important for us as we had spend almost all our savings on IVF home. Here are services included. 5 embryo transfers. In case of 5 negatives they refund the money paid. Medical treatment. Medications needed before transfer and 3 months after. Egg donor fee. Sperm donor (if needed). Pregnancy monitoring till 12th week. Embryo reduction (if needed). We got our official BFP which was almost unbelievable after years of trying and numerous shots. God blessed us finally!

Just wishing you the same soon luck x

Marmo profile image
Marmo

andylins In BTC they have got huge donor database. Each portfolio includes the detailed info about the donor. A thorough evaluation of potential egg donor is of critical importance, whether the donor is known to the recipient or is anonymous. The screening is served to protect all parties involved (the donor, the recipient and the resulting offspring). The donor requirements briefly are the following. The donor should generally be younger than 35 years old. She must be with laboratory evidence of normal ovarian reserve and no ndication of impaired fertility. She must undergo testing for communicable infectious diseases (hepatitis, HIV, syphilis) and genetic screening both via a detailed family history and specific blood tests which are determined by her ethnic/racial background (e.g. for cystic fibrosis, sickle cell disease). A formal sychological evaluation is also performed. Meaning donors are well prepared. And they know what sort of process they're participating in.The next thing is how IP choose the woman whoā€™s going to help them. This might be great if their wish and docā€™s suggestion fully coincide.

Thus chances of giving birth to a healthy baby after using IVF depend on various factors, including: Maternal age. The younger you are, the more likely you are to get pregnant and give birth to a healthy baby using your own eggs during IVF. Women age 41 and older are often counseled to consider using donor eggs during IVF to increase the chances of success. Embryo status. Transfer of embryos that are more developed is associated with higher pregnancy rates compared with less developed embryos (day two or three). However, not all embryos survive the development process. Talk with your doctor about your specific situation.

andylins profile image
andylins in reply to Marmo

I've read pretty much about egg donation. Ladies on forums sharing different points of view and experiences with the process. Once I happened to read a post where lady was saying her donor egg kid was a stranger for her. I really try not to criticize people, we are all different but she never posted about the problem of telling or not about using de at all. I am far from an expert but I think it would help to change her language first. Even in her own head. Lady refers to her own egg children as being her own children while her donor egg child is not her child. The donor egg used was a tiny microscopic cell that was transferred into the body. It was her body that nourished and grew that cell into a little baby. If it wasn't for her body the baby would not exist. So how could this baby be a stranger??! I wonder, people are still blessed to experience pregnancy though using donor egg but they do not appreciate this. We had DE IVF as the last possible option to have kids and are extremely thankful to the BTC clinic for the great job they did for us. I do think I'll never understand such women. No matter how babies are born to this world - They are completely ours! This also inspired us at the beginning of our journey - biotexcom.com/galleries/our....

Karinyaa profile image
Karinyaa

We faced failures too before finally passed DE IVF in Kyiv a year+ ago successfully. Also 1 delay. Because of OHSS (Ovarian hyper-stimulation syndrome). Drugs used for egg production stimulation enlarged the ovaries to dangerous extents. So we had to wait a little bit more than it was planned). I know how devastating one may feel and confused with the point it's NHS. And what explanation do docs give?..Is this connected with the egg quality? Or is this an issue of preparing home for the embies? One has to put herself together. Take care of yourself and hope for better. I guess docs must do investigation, find out what's the matter, probably make some changes to the treatment plan or offer you just another treatment option. Even a failure is a step for further success.

Our everall 3rd att was a rainbow. Though we had to survive 2 dreadful BFNs earlier. God blesses waiting, hoping and struggling. I wish your stay here is short and your dream come true soon. Take care and good luck.

andylins profile image
andylins

To be successful with the ivf treatment one should definitely trust the clinic and its staff. This is the most important choice in the whole process. Huge number of clinics all over the world offer treatments for infertile couples and their database, facilities, time frames differ much. For many couples (for us too) ivf shots were also a financial matter. We were looking for affordable prices in the area but the initial choice was wrong. I guess we made it in haste. We passed 2 ivf rounds, paid out of the pocket and got no result. Facing this outcome we began looking onto ivf overseas. Soon we found ourselves in BTC. Their package prices were even lower than we expected. Furthermore they offer contracts covering you from money loss- guaranteed refund in case of failures. I believe this is the huge pro for a clinic to be that sure of the outcome. As for the language barrier - You won't feel any difficulties. Almost all of their staff speaks English. Moreover, as soon as you sign up with them, their 24/7 English speaking support line gets available for you. Then of course, you can tell about your preferences. But the place is really busy, so you should prepare to possibly see another doc at the charge of the program (rare cases, but still it's possible). All in all, they're quite fast in responding the emails, I'm wishing you the very best of luck and support on your way.

SerrineV profile image
SerrineV

The inability to conceive a child in a natural way is definitely a huge tragedy for thousands of couples all over the world. Families facing infertility spend a lot of money and years of tcc in order to achieve a long-awaited pregnancy. Fortunately nowadays we've got lots of options to beat infertility. And there ARE methods that allow the majority to become parents. Even in the most hopeless cases!! Mitochondrial donation is one of unique methods to beat infertility. I usually write about it because the method is really amazing. It allows a woman who couldnā€™t conceive a baby for years to get pregnant and carry a healthy child. The correct work of egg mitochondria, that is their active functionality contributes to the successful conception. Consequently, if there's the issue with this activity, then it is necessary to implant healthy donor mitochondria. The mitochondrial donation program includes three main elements: #1 A donor with normal healthy mitochondria. # 2 A motherā€™s egg cell. # 3 Fatherā€™s sperm cell. Donor mitochondria allow the eggs of the infertile patient to work as it is necessary for successful conception. At the same time, a donor egg cell is not needed. Only mitochondria with high functional activity!! youtube.com/watch?v=k1kIYIs... is very informative.

andylins profile image
andylins

Iā€™m chiming in. Iā€™ve got absolutely different experiences after being treated at a Greek clinic and the one we used in Ukraine, BTC. So it was from my first cycle with the former. They were aggressive with the meds because I am older and had to taper them down a bit. But it was good because it got the follies going. We used a Lupron trigger and I really didn't have terrible OHSS signs after. Phew! My numbers were 20 follicles, 10 contained eggs, 9 were mature, 4 fertilized, 1 made to day 5. The shot ended in bfn. I didnā€™t want to go through this path again. ONE is too little! So at the latter clinic we went on directly to egg donation. Our dr felt more optimistic about this path. Anyways, I myself felt more ā€˜relaxedā€™ if it could be put like this. I didnā€™t have to inject myself daily and face all those side effects of stimulation, you know..Side note...I memorized the numbers and won $8 playing Mega Millions when got our first ever bfp resulting in a healthy baby. After some time passed we came back for a sibling. Got successful again. Being in good hands means everything.

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