Some advice please

[AJFinch]

Hello, I'm looking for some advice.

3 weeks ago, my dad of 66 went into hospital for an elective lobectomy. He had only one day's notice for the procedure following a few weeks worth of preliminary tests.

Following the surgery, he was moved to HDU and then to the ward and was set to come home.

The hospital did not send him home due to some concerns regarding some arythmia and his breathing.

He was moved back to ICU where we were informed he'd caught a chest infection. Following this, he was sedated, had a trach put in and a breathing machine was deployed. His condition continued to worsen and since then he's had an Ecmo machine added due to ARDS and also some dialysis for his kidneys.

He's been on ICU now for around two weeks, having the ecmo for 8 days, and we received an update tonight in which his condition is not improving and the first hints as to whether care should continue.

I guess my question is, when do you give up and allow them to stop the care being provided? I've seen many posts on this community in which people have rejected the 'give up' option and I need some advice on when this is the correct course of action.

Many thanks in advance,

Adam

[Sepsur]

Thankfully no-one gave up on me.

I had flu, double pneumonia & septic shock moving into severe ARDS. Later I picked up CMV, VRE, glandular fever and then they discovered I had leukaemia. After a two month medically induced coma, I woke up to that reality. Not expected to survive or recover, I am alive & well & pretty much back to normal 2yrs on.

[Tsoula]

My mum was in a coma for 6 weeks and twice during that time we were told she would not recover.....she is home and well and doing great.Dont give up ...big hugs as I know how stressful this time is xx

[kp2016]

ICU patients are complex, with many factors involved in decision making, the only people to know all the factors, and understand them is the team in charge of his care.

Being told someone may not survive, or unlikely to survive, is very, very different from talking about withdrawal of treatment.

No one on ICU works independently, any decision is made by the team, after ward round on my unit there is a meeting where every patient is discussed, there is 12-15 health care professionals in that meeting.

[Wazzafazza70]

So sorry to here the news about ure dad Adam. I onistly wouldn't no what to say .out of any answer id would suggest is if u think the times right maybe that might be ure answer .If u think he shouldn't be suffering anymore. 😀