My Son

Long story short, I have a 22 yr old son who has not lived with since he was 5 yrs old, he was statemented at school and had extra help. He went to the US with his father when he was 10 yrs old and has lived there for 10 yrs, whereupon he was also given special needs schooling within a normal school. He has always had difficulty socially and gets annoyed very easily, lots of other traits I could mention. He returned to me at Christmas and I am trying to help him as much as I can. I believe he certainly has traits of aspergers/autism and was wondering how to go about helping him. I tried my GP and asked for a referral to someone but because we went with a couple of things (needs to see a neurologist) he said he would prefer for that to looked at first. Should I go back and insist on seeing someone now, (neurologist appointment next wk now) and who do I ask for. I am very worried how his life is going to pane out, he is living with me again at the moment, but I know he wants a near normal life, he knows he struggles and cant always explain what he wants or the problems he is having, cant settle into work very easily, which is near impossible to get at the moment anyway, but who is going to give him a job as he his at present without any help in place. Some ideas would be great. Thank you

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  • Hi,

    My son is only eight with autism. So from my experience here is what I could think.

    The National Autistic society could help if you are in the U.K. They also have information on their website and may even visit you.However as I have not dealt with the adult side I am not sure.I know they have groups by area for adults over 18 or so.Support systems and advice.

    He needs possibly a psycologists - you are seeing a neurologist.So maybe things will take off from there.

    Often there are homes for adults with autism but that depends on yourself and how he is getting on.Its not an option I am giving you.They may have trips,support from carers e.t.c to try and get on their own feet. Thats something that is a big decision for any parent and will take time to decide

    The doctor needs to be more proactive as if you feel he has traits of aspergers then he may need a diagnosis which is important in getting support in all areas in the first place. As it varies for children I am not sure how you would go about it. Tell the doctor - another one if necessary that you feel he needs to be assesed possibly. That in itself is the start to getting support. Tell the doctor you need more information ans support for him as well if you havent and it sounds like you have.

    Also contact the socials services in your area and tell them about your son and the support you need.What do they have or offer??. Be firm with them as they could be hard to get through to from the operator and admin. You need to speak to a social worker for adults with special needs possibly in your area Hope this helps you.

  • Thanks for responding, I will digest this and re-read several times, as I suffer from Fibromyalgia and dont take information in very easily, thank you for your time

  • hello dixie

    sorry your struggling i dont knwo what to tell you but know your not alown

    elfiie

  • Hello Dixie,

    I am a 38 year old female with Aspergers, I was diagnosed around 8 months ago. My life has been very difficult at times but I now am a qualified teacher and happily married with a wonderful family of 5(two of whom are also diagnosed). I achieved University, a teaching career, marriage and children before I knew I had Aspergers-so your son has a big advantage, he can understand his difference as can the people who love him, this really helps because for a long time I kept wondering why everything kept going wrong for me all the time and why I had no friends! .At your son's age I was in a similar position. Sometimes it may just take a bit more time for us to achieve our goals in life. I am not pretending it has been easy for me but it is very possible to have a good life and to work. Are there any particular aspects of your son's life that are worrying you the most? I hope this gives you hope. xxx

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