My friend + Me

[top21]

Hi! Im 13 and i think my best friend may be slightly on the spectrum. From my knowledge he's not been diagnosed with anything but he aligns with a lot of the symptoms of autism. He prefers to avoid speaking in places like class, He reacts fairly negatively when asked to do something. He takes little interest in other people except me, he avoids eye contact a lot as well. He is specifically interested in music but at the same i am as well. He also gets upset if there are changes to his routine. He also suffers from OCD, GAD, Sleep problems and did suffer from depression. He is also Trans which I've read also contributes to autism. another think i noticed is i link for a lot of the symptoms of autism. I prefer to avoid speaking in places, i react negatively when asked to do something, take little to none interest in people except my friend, i avoid eye contact, im extremely interested in music and nothing else and i get very upset when i have a change to my routine, i also have symptoms of ADHD, OCD and sleep problems. We both also have very common breakdowns to the slightest things. I have cried plenty a time in class when someone has took the piss out of me. Thats all i have. I would just like some confirmation. Thanks!

[Felixmum]

I think you should talk to someone in school,looks like you've already had some help,but for a proper diagnosis you need a doctor etc.

[emmasue]

Well, for a 13 year old, you are surprisingly self aware! That's a good thing. If you are concerned that you might be on the spectrum, I would speak to your parents. If you aren't comfortable talking to them, you need to speak to someone at school. Does your school have a SENCO (Special Educational Needs Coordinator)? Find out who that person is and arrange to meet with them. Explain your difficulties and why you think you may be on the spectrum. I personally believe that a lot of people on the spectrum are not being diagnosed because they manage their behaviour in public so well. It's only once home that they can let go. However, I do think that this is changing. I know my husband (aged 44) is on the spectrum but he has never been diagnosed. He has found life difficult and I believe an earlier diagnosis would have helped, but 30 years ago getting an autism diagnosis was difficult. My 11 year old son has only just been diagnosed. It does help him to know. We try not to use it as an excuse for bad behaviour, however, it helps him to know why he finds school difficult, especially socialising with the other kids. He only has one friend who is on the spectrum as well. They make good friends because they can fall out but then be friends again the next day like nothing has happened. They both know that some days are harder than others. So with regards to your friend, I suggest that you just be a good friend. Be there for him and he has a bad day, just remember it isn't personal. It is important to have good friends but I know they can be hard to find. Good luck and I hope that you get the answers you need.

[top21 in reply to emmasue]

Thanks for your help! I have someone like that in my school who i would like to talk to, problem is she will tell my parents but i will try anyway! Thank you so much for your help!!

[emmasue in reply to top21]

I hope it works out ok! Best of luck. ☺

[davidgolf49 in reply to emmasue]

???? My 11 year old son has only just been diagnosed. It does help him to know. We try not to use it as an excuse for bad behaviour

That's very intolerant of you..bad behaviour? He can't control his behaviour, and bad? Sorry but you are expecting him to be like a neuro-typical child, bad? is he killing people? robbing banks? attacking old ladies??

You sound like my Mother, she used to call me naughty and expected me to excel in school and in life and i didn't enjoy my childhood due to be told to be like my cousin Malcolm(he was always better in Maths)

[davidgolf49]

He might have just GAD, not necessarily ASD.