aspergers/autism: I have a 49 year old son... - Autism Support

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aspergers/autism

maggie41 profile image
5 Replies

I have a 49 year old son whom I think has autism. I read something about a woman with a child and the child would never respond to affection. My son was the same way as an infant and a child. He would not let you cuddle him, if you kissed him on the cheek he'd wipe his face. As an adult you can't show any affection. He constantly reads something negative into anything you say and twists things around. For years when I'd tell people about the affection matter they would look at me as if I were making it up. I was so relieved when I read about this woman and her child. I can't find the article and would like to read it again. Can someone tell me where to find it or comment on what I have typed. Thank you

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maggie41 profile image
maggie41
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5 Replies

There is a book called  The reason I jump by Naoki Higashida which is very good. It sounds very much like Asbergers. One of my sons has the issues you describe. . What you are also looking for is prediction, a major issue , such as my youngest nearly always did not do   homework, could not follow through the consequences of what would happen. Being very rigid in his thoughts, not very loving or showing emotions. Not having many friends, limited interests, very clever like mini professors in a particular subject, routines, Each case is unique, no two people with Asbergers are the same .A lot of people spend time in their rooms playing computer games. It's a case of  looking through lots of websites and a lot of reading. 

The only way you will find out for sure is to have him tested but there is such a poor understanding of Autism , GPs , Mental  Health Services it's a post code lottery. 

in reply to

Oh I forgot my eldest is very negative, this won't work, can't possibly do that. This is part of the anxiety , it's one of the main issues people with Autism have with depression. See if you can call into any support groups and talk to other parents/ carers . At the end of the day the choice is up to your son if he wants to find out. Good Luck.

Nozmo profile image
Nozmo

Hi Maggie, I don't know of the article you're describing sorry. Have you looked at the National Autistic Society website? There's a lot of advice on there about all aspects of autism and there are links to other websites and press releases etc...

My son has a diagnosis of autism and I always use the NAS website as my first port of call if I'm looking for information.

Hope this helps.

Dewy9698 profile image
Dewy9698

Hi.......Sorry i havent heard of the article you mentioned. Both my grown up sons are on the Autistic Spectrum, both high functioning, my younger slightly more so than my elder son. Both have support workers. Luckily I have never had any issues with physical affection from either of them but loads with rigid routines and thinking, getting attached to certain objects ,my younger son, who is 19 now, still has part of a comforter he had as a baby, neither will part with video games they haven't played in years etc, experts on certain subjects, social anxiety, general anxiety, depression and inability to cope with change or new situations which meant transitions from primary to secondary, from secondary to working (which neither are at the moment, despite both being bright boys) extremely difficult to cope with, food and other sensory issues are all part of it. As a parent it can be absolutely heartbreaking to watch as they aren't living their lives to the full. Like the lady above said, the NAS are an excellent source of information and support. Its never too late to get a diagnosis, if wanted or deemed needed, a formal diagnosis opens up doorways to more support, but as an adult it has to be your sons choice and decision. Best wishes.

Dewy9698 profile image
Dewy9698 in reply to Dewy9698

'As the MAN above said....' Sorry Nozmo! =0)

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