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Hi there everyone, my name is David and I live in Duncan B.C Canada and have been living with Hep C for about 30 years now. I was treated in 2001 with Rebatron yet unfortunately I was non-responsive to the treatment. I also live with Complex-P.T.S.D and very high Iron levels. Over the years, as time has moved on, I've become increasingly more isolated and lonely. I exist on a Canada pension and have very low income, however...I grateful that I have something. I will be going for one more ultra-sound on my liver this month and a colonoscopy as I've been bleeding when using the washroom. I hope to connect with individuals here who might be experiencing isolation and might be feeling lonely and without hope. I it is great to have a forum to share and look forward to connecting with you. Thanks David

90 Replies

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  • Post Traumatic Stress Disorder... hope you are having a good day ragivao.

  • Thankyou was wondering what it was!

  • Hi David,

    I was a Fellow Pacific Northwest resident .. Lived in Portland for 17 years. Now in New Zealand. How far is Duncan from White Rock?

    Anyway I have suffered from both PTSD & cirrhosis. You're not alone

  • Hi David,

    I live Uk, have Hep C 33 years and also know well what's it's like to feel isolated and lonely.

    It's always good to be hopeful, helps to draw good things to you.. people,treatments etc

    I've also lived with p.s.t.d. many years now..there is a good p.t.s.d site within Health Unlocked,

    Worth taking a look and joining that too

    All good wishes to you David

  • Hi Jenny,

    Thanks for your reply. Yes, Hep C can feel isolating and lonely, yet it is good to have a site like this to connect with individuals like yourself. I'm hopeful about the new treatments that seem to be coming out, mostly from Giliad pharmaceuticals here in North America, unfortunately the cost is really, really high. Some treatments are at a cost of $700.00 per pill. I have Geno-type 1a and would need a 24 week run on the medicine, which would cost $100,000. This is not covered by the British Columbia medical services. Currently, I live on a small pension of $900.00 per month and the cost of living here on Vancouver island is really expensive, so...I get by, yet just barely. As you mentioned you too, are living with P.T.S.D. Are you taking medication for it ? I take several anti-depressants and anxiety medication, it is a challenging disorder and I'm about to start another round of councellng for it. Lots is happening in the UK with Brexit and I've been watching it on the news here in Duncan B.C. Canada. I wish you all the best and hope that you are feeling better soon. Bless you for responding. Many thanks David.

  • Hi, just reading your comment regarding the exorbitant costs in Canada, US and most Western countries. I just want to let you folks know that our non profit soulofhealing.org helps with patient assistance programs to procure hep c treatments. We're pretty darn successful. We hope you stop by. In the mean time our blessings to you and the best of health.

  • Hi, new member here. I did interferon 4 times, moved to a legal marijuana state in the U.S, and did marijuana for about 6 months and I cleared the virus. Also good for pstd.

  • Hi

    I'm not anti weed medicinally or recreationally

    I spent too many years appreciating it's benefits but my nephew became schizophrenic after using

    and an ex became psychotic after over indulging so it doesn't have benevolent effects for everyone..

    like any drug works for some. dangerous for others

  • Hi David,

    I'm same genotype as you, but may not be offered any treatment for a long time as all my test results ok,

    long waiting list in my area, which is Cornwall UK

    l live near Bodmin Moor which is a wild and beautiful place with Neolithic stone circles, sheep,ponies and other animals... you could google it.

    I've not been on any meds for over 30 years, found holistic self help ..Bach flower remedy Cheery Plum and Rock Rose, E.F.T. tapping works too,

    I've found prayer a great source of strength.

    Best therapy was taking on fifteen rescue pets,at same time,..six dogs and nine cats

    Didn't have time to think of myself and six miles at least 'walkies' every day in beautiful countryside was therapeutic.

    As you're not able to have treatment at present d'you take any supplements for liver health ie milk thistle,alpha lipoic acid,tumeric, blueberry leaf?

    Always happy to correspond Duncan,

    Best wishes,

    Jenny

  • Dear Jenny,

    Like you my alt/ast levels are slightly high and I battle with high iron levels as well. I find myself mostly battling fatigue and gastro intestinal problems. So, like you I'm not on the list of individuals needing treatment right away. We have no waiting lists here in British Columbia Canada, yet have a large population on individuals living here who are Hep C positive. A new treatment has just been approved by health Canada, however...the cost is outrageous at $120,000 dollars for a 24 week treatment. It is not covered by our medical system. I'm hopeful that in time the cost will come down and it may be covered.

    It sounds like you live in a lovely place, I'm fascinated by the ancient stone circles. It is wonderful to have the animals and nature all around you too. My gosh, you have quite the lot, with six dogs and nine cats ! Wow. I love the animal rescues and the people who, like yourself pitch in and help then out, good for you ! I have a 24 lbs. Tabby named George, who is a huge ball of love. The animals help so much in our healing, don't they. The area I live in is what was a logging town. Now the logging industry has slowed very much and the town is growing as young families are moving here slowly, as the housing prices and rentals are less expensive than the major cities like, Vancouver and Victoria.

    I'm surrounded by forests with Deer and black bears as well, cougars, yet they are not often seen. Some of the tree's on Vancouver island are 1000 years old and are wonderful to see and hug ! I'm trying to get myself out walking again, I too find it very helpful. I've been very challenged with Complex-P.T.S.D. and at times find it hard to leave my little apartment. However, seems I'm slowly doing a little better and manage a few walks here and there.

    Yes, I too take Milk thistle, Turmeric, and many other herbs and supplements. Prayer and meditation has been a life line for me as well. You sound like a lovely person Jenny and it is so nice to correspond with you. Have a wonderful day. Best wishes, David :-) P.S. will definitely google where you live and see the beautiful countryside you speak of.

  • Hi David,

    May be confusing me with someone else re levels as mine came back ok...just high vl..everything else,touch wood, ok. If you have tea after a meal supposed to stop iron being absorbed as much

    Even some veg etc high in iron..Quinoa,buckwheat,watercress etc

    I don't want to take Harvoni.

    .I've read too much on line with people/families suing harvoni and left worse than before treatment, mostly female

    Works well for some, not others

    don't want to play Russian roulette with my health.

    Big Pharma are a greedy bunch of so & so's..

    As long as they're making the big bucks out of the likes of you and me ,don't think they care too much and only reveal true extent of side effects when they are forced to

    Want to find something to bring my vl down..just started taking blueberry leaf as supposed to stop replication..maybe just in vitro

    have to see

    Canada sounds majestic and wonderful and George a great companion

    I lost the last of my fifteen last year and adopted two beautiful Main Coons Marhaba and his lovely wife Petaluma

    They were a breeding pair and needed a lot of T.L.C and extensive vets treatment.

    Petaluma has the Calici and herpes viruses but is doing very well..dormant

    Marhaba looks just like a mini lion ,same colouring and features

    but temperament like the lion in the Wizard of Oz as very quiet and shy.

    You also come across as a really nice,good person.

    I hope some new treatments come out with fewer side effects and you get all the help you need.

    It's a pleasure to be in contact with you David

    All good wishes.

  • Dear Jenny,

    So nice to hear back from you ! Thank you for the tip about drinking tea after a meal to avoid excess iron being absorbed. I had forgot about that, thanks so much I'll start to do that again. I mostly eat a vegetation diet, yet stay away from vegetables high in iron, which is not easy. However, the non-heme iron has less absorption, I don't consume any red meats and have poultry once in while.

    I was not aware of the potential side effects of Harvoni, I too don't want to play Russian roulette with my health so thanks for that information. Your so right about big Pharma and the greed, some times all I can do is just shake my head and wonder about these huge corporations, it is really sad at times to consider the lack of care, at times it seems it is all about profit over peoples health.

    I'll look at trying blueberry leaf too, I also use Pau D'arco which is a south American herb and seems to boost the immune system, it has proved helpful with cancer patients and individuals living with H.I.V.

    As you shared about your two cats, you now have two and I had a chuckle as the one sounds like a little lion. I had a main coon too. Her name was "Miss Jane" and she lived up to her name, she was quite the personality and very set in her ways, a wonderful cat. She was calico and a huge ball of fur and loved to be brushed.

    I took the time to google where you live, what a beautiful place ! So much open sky and rolling hills, it looks particularly rugged and the rocks and foliage give it quite a mystical feel. The town I live in is called the "city of Totem's" as we have Totem poles everywhere which have been erected by the "Cowichan tribes" here, they are the first nations people ( north American Indians) and have lived in the area for approximately 10,000 years. There is a great deal to learn from them as they know of the local plants and the medicine some of the plants provide. I've been invited into their community at times and taught how to cook Salmon on the beach using Cedar wood and also how to cook using a pit and heated stones. There is so much to learn.

    Thanks Jenny for your tip and support it is really nice to correspond with you. Best wishes to you too. Take care for now, David.

  • Thanks so much David for your reply too

    I've just been looking at your town/area

    Looks great, all the wonderful totems/scenery

    Been interested in the North American Indian life/spirituality since I was given a book on them when I was nine.

    I lived in San Francisco many years ago,

    Navaho Indians in that area, have quite a few pieces of their beautiful silver,turquoise and coral jewellery with feather design imprinted on the silver

    Never been to Canada but many years ago had a friend from Toronto and have always enjoyed Leonard Cohens' music/poetry, Hallelujah being my favourite sung by Jeff Buckley ,Tim Buckleys' son

    Being by the sea and learning to cook in the open air Red Indian style sounds great and something i'd love to do

    Are you Canadian David? Have you ever travelled to Europe?

    quite a distance from Canada .Is it very cold in the winter?

    Very mild in Cornwall and you're right there is a strong mystical feel here with many following the Nature spiritual paths.

    The hedge rows are beautiful in Spring/Summer,

    pink wild campions,foxgloves,bluebells,Periwinkles and all the wild daffodils everywhere in early Springtime

    I love the old stone walls with the wild flowers in the nooks and crannies,

    thriving in an inhospitable environment, nature strives to survive and so do we.

    Wondered if you're an ex vet/serviceman. many had severe PTSD.

    When I lived in S.F ,1980, I stayed with a family where the dad had been in Vietnam.

    Was very disturbed by his experience there and how they were treated when they returned home again,

    Hope you continue to improve David,

    Better and better..each day in every way.

    All good wishes

    Jenny

  • Ps I'll try to send a smiley,:never done it before so bear with me David if it doesn't work

    :-)

  • Dear Jenny,

    Your smiley worked just fine ! Thanks for taking the time to see where I live, and your interest in First Nations people and their spirituality. The really have an earth based spirituality and see the earth as our mother and so much of their teachings are about respect for others and ourselves. It is always amazing to me to see the strength of their community, which has suffered horrible poverty, abuse and alienation from main stream society, they are a fractured people who are healing and it is wonderful to see the progress they are making on the road to recovery.

    I am Canadian and was born in Toronto Canada and moved to British Columbia in 1989. Over the years this place is really now my home. So, you lived in San Francisco! That must have been wonderful I've not been there, however I worked in L.A. in the early nineties. In the mid nineties I travelled to Europe and visited Greece, Italy and then flew to London and spent some time there. You mentioned Lenard Cohen, funny when I was in Greece and on the island of Santorini, I remember listening to his music in the cafe's as the locals there just love his music, as do I.

    Where I live on Vancouver Island it is very mild and the weather is very similar to the UK, we have a great deal of rain in the fall and winter and the spring and summer is just spectacular. I loved your analogy of the flower and little bushes that grow through the rocks in the stone walls where you live, and that nature survives, as do we. How, true. In terms of the Complex P.T.S.D. that I live with, I'm not a Veteran. I came from a highly abusive family system in which there was every type of abuse you can imagine. At ten years of age, I was involved in an a violent encounter at school when a 14 year old student held 90 of us school children hostage for about ninety minuets and shots were fired. No one was killed, however he did start to line us up to be shot. It was terrifying for a small boy, who was already experiencing abuse at home. I ran away from home many, many times and finally escaped the family system when I unfortunately ran to the streets of Toronto. I was on the streets for about nine years and involved in drug use, which is where I most likely acquired Hep C. Today I've been clean many years yet, at times slipped into using alcohol use at times. It has been a long journey of many, many years of healing, via... Counselling, spirituality and alternative therapies for hep c, using herbs...etc.

    I was treated in 2001 with "Rebatron" yet did not respond to the treatment and was left without hope. After which I have several breakdowns and was diagnosed with Complex-P.T.S.D. Part of the healing involved trying to prosecute through the courts the offender who was responsible for the abuse, however...the crown did not foresee a conviction, due to lack of witnesses, which is not uncommon in these cases. So, I applied for compensation through the province of Ontario, and they granted me funding for counselling under the Victims of Crime Board. Today, I'm still healing, and getting stronger every day. Some times life deals us lots to get through, yet...through it all , I've seen my strength and desire to just keep surviving. What helps me today is my faith and meditation as well having a great doctor who, understands P.T.S.D. and the meds that help people like me.

    Tomorrow, I'm having another Ultra sound on my liver and then on the 25th, a colonoscopy as I've been bleeding when using the washroom. So over the weekend I'll be doing a colon cleans...not very fun.

    Anyhow, this is quite a long email. As always Jenny, it is so nice to hear from you and connect, I wish you all the best and hope that tomorrow you have a wonderful day. David :-)

  • Hi David,

    Would have replied earlier but received no notification,

    So pleased to hear from you..i'll write at length this eve as have to go out now.

    You mentioned bleeding..wonder if any connection with the Pau D'arco which many med sites say is unsafe

    Have the best day you can

    Best wishes..Jenny

  • Pau d'arco is POSSIBLY UNSAFE when taken by mouth in typical doses. Talk with your healthcare provider before you decide to take it. Pau d’arco is LIKELY UNSAFE when taken by mouth in high doses. High doses can cause severe nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, dizziness, and internal bleeding.

    Best wishes.

  • I c/p that from Web MD

  • Now for the full length message

    My background has some similarities but without your horrific ordeal at school

    So sorry to hear you underwent that experience, would give anyone PTSD

    I also had a very dysfunctional ,abusive childhood with violent,abusive mother and rejecting dad

    I also ran away but always returned as too young to get by on my own

    I finally left home at 17 to live with my daughters' father, Irish, violent alcoholic

    Not much change there then

    Most of my life I've been in abusive relationships, was also homeless,

    broke into empty houses to squat with my daughter, and also got into drugs

    hello hep C.

    Was also addicted to Valium etc ten years and was very bad when I stopped.,in hospital under section.

    Didn't know coming off suddenly could cause psychosis/hallucinations etc

    This is all many years ago and I've worked,self employed in holistic healing/naturopathic field for 30 years..own my home, a cottage on the edge of the moor.

    .It's small but full of character,with beams,open fire/woodburner and great garden full of wildflowers with beautiful countryside all around

    healing and peaceful

    You are always very welcome here David if you ever find you're able to travel.

    I am also very glad to be in contact

    Hope you're test results are good

    Bye for now David, all good wishes,

    Jenny

    :-)

  • Dear Jenny,

    Thanks for sharing your story with me, so you too had quite a traumatic childhood. Like yourself I ran away many times, always brought back to the abusive home by the police. In those day I guess these was not as much awareness as there is today, though I'm sure there was lots of abusive homes back then, I'm surely not alone in that respect. Yet, there were no services or places a child could call to get help, now children are much more educated and yet the abuse continues.

    You were homeless too, and had a child with you, my gosh that must have been very, very hard and very traumatising. You mentioned that, you as well got into drug and is where you most likely contracted hep C. Yes me too. You also mentioned that you were addicted to Valium. Wow, that is one hard drug to come off of. I worked for a number of years in a recovery house in Vancouver B.C. and we had a few residents that had developed an addiction to Valium. It was really hard for them to come off the drug. In my training it was mentioned that Benzodiazepines, Methadone and Heroin, are the most difficult drug to recover from and all require a long period of detox.

    Amazingly you recovered from those days and work as a holistic healing naturopath for 30 years. Wow, you must have so much knowledge after all that time. Thanks for letting me know about the Pau D'arco, I've only used it in small amounts and brewed it in a tea. However, I have read about some negative effects it can cause in large amounts. So, thanks for the warning and I'll stop using it. I'm interested in Blueberry leaf you take which might slow down the replication of the virus. Now that is very interesting for sure. Do you take it as a tea ? I'll be having a viral load done soon, so I'll know how much of the virus is there. Here it is really hard to get that test done, the medical system here, usually only does that test if one is going to be treated with one of the various drugs for Hep C.

    It is very, very kind of you to offer me a place to visit. Wow, how nice. However, I live on a very small disability pension and do not see my self being able to travel in the future, unless of course I win the Lotto...LOL. Your place sounds lovely with a fireplace and wooden beams and a lovely garden out back, sounds idyllic and serene. As you say healing and peaceful. Well Jenny, this weekend I'll be preparing for the colonoscopy on Monday, so tomorrow I start by taking three tablets in the evening. Then on Sunday no solid foods and I'm to drink a litre of a liquid which then cleans out the colon, so I'll be at home near the bathroom for sure. Monday morning at 5.00 a.m. I then once again I drink another litre of the liquid and then wait until I have to go again. I'll be at the hospital for 10:30 a.m. and the colonoscopy is scheduled for 12:00 noon. So, there is my exciting weekend...LOL !

    Well Jenny as always it is so nice to hear from you and I hope you had a lovely day. It is also nice to hear how well your cat is fed and your cat sounds quite choosey with its food. My George will eat just about anything, and at times he roots around the kitchen floor always looking for something that might of dropped and he can munch on, at 24 lbs, He is certainly well fed, yet he came like that from the pound when I got him, he's just a big boy and a very loving grey tabby. I wish you all the best and please take good care Jenny, bye for now. David :-)

  • Hi David,

    Found this on HU Heal my PTSD c/pasted it:

    Someone asked me to give them some resources that might help in recovery. I made up a list of books that I've either used, or heard great things about. I thought I'd add the list here on the forum.

    It Will Never Happen to Me, by Claudia Black

    Adult Children of Alcoholics by Janet Woititz

    The Dance of Anger by Harriet Lerner

    Adult Children of Alcoholics Syndrome by Dr. Wayne Kritsberg

    Healing The Child Within: Discovery and Recovery For Children of Dysfunctional Homes by Charles Whitfield

    Struggle For Intimacy by Janet Woititz

    Codependent No More by Melodie Beattie

    Facing Codependence by Pia Melody

    Understanding Codependency by Sharen Wegsheider-

    Cruse

    Your Life After Trauma by Michele Rosenthal

    Healing The Shame That Binds You by John Bradshaw

    Homecoming: Reclaiming and Healing Your Inner Child by John Bradshaw

    Family Secrets: The Path From Shame To Healing by John Bradshaw

    The Drama Of The Gifted Child: Alice Miller

    Embracing Fear by Thom Rutledge

    If You Meet The Buddha On The Road, Kill Him by Sheldon Koop

    The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron

    Complex PTSD by Pete Walker

    Healing Trauma by Peter Levine

    Thanks for kind feedback on my previous message David,

    George is a lucky boy to have such a great owner

    and of course you're also lucky to have him.

    I've stopped all work for the moment,

    Needed time for me

    I get some extra help financially from the Govt. benefits program

    so at least I can pay the vets' bills etc

    Very grateful for that

    Good to hear you're doing all that's needed for your test to go well

    Sounds quite intensive

    Wouldn't want to be too far from your bathroom!

    Thinking of you for Monday

    All good wishes to you and George

    Jenny :-)

  • Dear Jenny,

    Thanks for the list of you have posted. That was kind of you. I particularly like the "Bradshaw" books. I find he really has a great way of explain the family system and how it works.

    So of the other books I have read, yet there are a number there I have not read and will look for them at our local library here in Duncan.

    Good that you can receive some financial assistance from the Government benefits program that should help out some.

    Good for you for taking some time off for yourself, it is so needed at times. I'm wishing you a lovely weekend and hope that you are well and feeling good too. Best wishes Jenny, David :-)

  • I've been to a lovely little seaside resort ten miles away called Looe, you could google it if you'd like to,

    We had lunch there overlooking the harbour, warm and sunny, watched the brightly coloured fishing boats going out

    I see an old friend called Les every Sunday and we have an outing somewhere scenic nearby as he has an hours' journey to my place

    He lives in Devon which is over the county border to Cornwall.

    I've lived all over Cornwall as I used to also do houses up and sell on

    Didn't make much but paid my vets bills for six dogs and nine cats for seventeen years

    My favourite part of Cornwall is around a fishing/seaside town called St Ives with wonderful beaches,wild seascapes and moorland.

    If you could google the road from St Ives to St Just, it's exceptionally beautiful, like entering a different time zone,

    No houses just ancient granite stone outcrops on the hills with wonderful seascape views all the way.

    My thoughts and good wishes are with you for tomorrow, Bye for now David, have a good eve too.

    Jenny :-)

  • Dear Jenny, What a lovely email. It sounds like you had a wonderful day, the scenery sounds just fantastic. Isn't nice that you've got your friend Les to visit on Sundays, I'm sure he really appreciates your visits. It's nice to plan an outing and I've heard of Devon, of course. I'll google the places that you've mentioned.

    I love the countryside where you live, it seems so rugged and the beaches must be marvelous.

    It is 5:15 a.m. here in Duncan B.C and it has been quite the experience as I prepared for the colonoscopy. It is today at 12:00 noon. I've not eaten solid foods since Saturday at 4:00 p.m. and started the cleanse/bowel prep at 5:00 p.m. on Sunday....well there was no point in sleeping, let me tell you. I've been going non stop to the bathroom all night and so I just gave up on sleep. I'll be checking in at the hospital at 10:30 a.m. at which point they will be administering a sedative through I.V. so most likely I'll sleep through most of it, which suits me just fine.

    If they find polyps, those will be removed and they will also take tissue samples, which will be sent to the B.C. Cancer agency for testing, I'll know the results in two weeks. Anyhow, almost all over now just the colonoscopy, the cleanse is the worst part.

    Well, I hope you have a wonderful day and as always it is great to hear from you Jenny. Take good care and best wishes to you. David :-)

  • Do hope all went well.

    This a c/p of a reply to someone else on a HU site..thought you'd find it meaningful:

    Working on it, plus being strong and setting boundaries with everyone, honoring myself, fighting for myself, finding my inner strength and compass again, God, that still inner voice that tells me what I need to do, my true self, who God created me to be and no one can take it away, it is a gift, a birthright to each of us from God, like we all are, gifts from God-- and follow it, not be afraid. Just be who God made us to be, all of us, to reflect the amazing beauty of God.

    And try to let God turn a 'great mess', what looks like one, for sure! into some great-ness (whatever that is really) that reflects the light and love and magnificence of God shining through what looks like a bunch of tangled threads.

    I know nothing.

    Just that I identify and I am taking one step at a time. Each day.

    Good for you for all you have done and been able to do with the hand God dealt to you. Good job. Give yourself credit.

    You have love in you, I can tell from your posts

    Prayers for ourselves and for the ones who hurt us who did not know any better because someone hurt them,

    may we all accept God's grace, mercy, forgiveness, love and healing to soften our hearts and minds and spirits, and become more loving, compassionate, kind to ourselves and others, trust God's love for us, (all learn to stand up for ourselves too of course and set good boundaries around our sacred souls, each of us, ourselves and those who harmed us because they were harmed

    Amen I say David.

  • Dearest Jenny,

    Amen, to your posting. Thank you for posting it. You know it is amazing how God gives me just what I need to hear at just the right time.

    I need to be strong too and set healthy boundaries too. It is so true that others have hurt me because of their own hurt and unmet needs. It is certainly the case in terms of the person who abused me when I was young. Coming to forgiveness towards that person has been a very long journey. Yet, really it is I who suffer when I can not reach forgiveness. I heard it said that, the word forgiveness originally comes from a Greek word which means " to simply yield " isn't that interesting ? To yield, to simply let go and move on.

    I can tell by your posts that you are a very kind soul and someone who has learnt a great deal on your journey. It is so nice to connect with you Jenny. Today, I'm just recovering from the colonoscopy which was done yesterday. They removed three polyps and found diverticula in the colon. It was quite the procedure to go through and I'm pretty sore today. They gave me a lot of drugs prior to the procedure, benzodiazepine and fentanyl for pain. So, I was quite sedated most of the day.

    I came home and slept for most of the evening, I must of slept for about 14 hours in total. Tomorrow I need to go grocery shopping and then the next day I'll be meeting with a new counsellor, who I'll be seeing for awhile. I was granted another 30 sessions from the Ontario Criminal Injuries Compensation board, which is where the crimes were committed when I was a child. So, I'm so grateful to them for that.

    I hope that you are having a wonderful day Jenny. God bless you and take good care. Once again thank you for sharing your post with me. Best wishes, David :-)

  • Hi David,

    So good as always to hear from you too and hope you're recovering well after the procedure,

    taking lots of time out for yourself

    I've also found forgiveness hard,impossible at times

    Thought i'd got there when I remember something and I realise the pain and rage are still in me

    It's beyond rationalisation.

    I can forgive with my thoughts but to let it go completely, maybe it's a process, more and more a time goes on

    I try to 'cast my burdens on the Christ within, and I go free' as often as I can, and pray that God forgives with me/for me when it seems beyond my human capability.

    This too was on another HU site.

    Parables are a great way to show the truths within situations....

    One day a professor announced to his students that they were going to have an unexpected quiz. After the moans and groans settled down, he passed out the test and everyone was surprised when they saw that the only thing on the paper was a "little black dot". The professor told them to write about what they saw on the paper. At the end of class, as the papers were turned in, the professor proved a point in that everyone wrote about the little black dot and no one wrote about the space all around that dot. What it proved was although we are given many positive things in our lives, we tend to concentrate on that black dot of negative thoughts. Something to think about today.

    May God bless you,George and your lives David each day in every way.

    Jenny ;-)

  • Dear Jenny,

    Once again thank you for your reply. Forgiveness surely is a tough one, and at times like you mentioned it seems beyond my human capacity. It is hard to understand how children can be so badly abused in our world. I suppose that there has to be understanding in the process of forgiveness, for with out understanding, how can we forgive ?

    I guess all I can come up with was that, the abuser was himself, abused. In saying that, it is how the perpetual cycle of abuse continues and I suppose that, the abused person can turn their rage and hurt outwards on to others. In my case, I turned it inwards towards myself and have hurt myself deeply. So, there needs to be self forgiveness and understanding for me too.

    However, it seems to be a long and difficult journey to reach these levels of forgiveness. I really have no other choice in the process but to go to God. I'm grateful that God has placed the supports in my life to assist in process. Life surely can be challenging at times.

    Today, I'm still sore from the procedure and recovering, yet I have a counselling session today, which I mentioned in my last post to you. I feel really nervous knowing that, I'll need to once more access the memories of abuse and process them once again. Gosh, I really do not want to go there, such is the nature of complex-P.T.S.D. and avoidance is often where one goes in a case like this.

    Thanks for the parable of the "black dot" on the paper. How true it is ! It is so easy to stare at the black dot and not see the space around us. At least that has been the case with me. Your kind to share these things they are very helpful. Jenny, I hope that you are having a wonderful day today in your beautiful cottage by the moor. May your day be filled with peace and be stress free and I hope that you are feeling well too. It is a very warm day here and it is hot in the apartment, poor George is hot too and I needed to wet him down some to cool him, poor little fellow.

    Take good care for now and thanks for keeping in contact, it means a great deal to me. Best wishes and many blessings to you. David :-)

  • Dear ,David and George,

    It means much to me also ,

    to have this messaging contact.

    It's been cool here in Uk,some lovely sunny days but mostly overcast with showers,

    Do hope the therapy goes well and isn't too stressful.

    I've been meditating more recently and noticed how beautiful the trees in my garden look today

    ,the shapes of nature that the treetops make with their leaves swaying in the breeze

    There are wild roses and honeysuckle too which exude a wonderful heady scent. Just purchased an arondack chair fom Amazon

    It's great ,so comfortable

    but to return to the darker side for a few moments

    Since I was 8/9 I've had a mind state called depersonalisation which has improved enormously over the years.

    Some people get this after PTSD, others who have had worse do not.

    It means you feel very spaced out,without anything..

    It's a bit like brain fog but different..like the terror has driven ones' sense of self so deeply down it feels like you don't exist, there is a space,a blankness where others have that sense of self integrated in a 'normal' persona

    It really improved once I went gluten free and used E.F.T. and Bach flower remedies

    it's still there albeit mildly now,

    have learnt to live with it,got used to it although i'm aware something's up and

    i'm not like like other people.

    However on the plus side I've functioned with it,not great but adequately enough so no one would realise I had this

    .I think abuse is also an ego malfunction,a contamination of personality with a lack of awareness to integrate,control certain impulses.

    a psychopathology..

    like Jesus said

    they know not what they do' and even if they did ,do not have the capability to stop.

    I also turned to God because that was all I had,all I could do

    I've always felt that support and strength underpinning my life and am immensely grateful for it.

    I was brought up in the Jewish faith but converted many years ago

    I'm sorry to hear you have been hard on yourself over the years

    I just attracted more of the same, abusive,violent partners for last thirty years

    Not any more thank goodness

    i'd rather be on my own,

    which has it's benefits of safety and peace of mind although there is the other side too of lonliness and isolation

    I hope you've had a good day too David and George,as good as you can

    Could you put ice in his drinking water maybe?

    I used to do that if it was too hot and seemed to work

    Thinking of you both fondly

    All good wishes

    Jenny :-)

  • Dear Jenny,

    I forgot to mention that today is world Hepatitis day, and there was a protest in Trafalgar square in London U.K. It was the first official "die in" and had hundreds of individuals lying on the ground, as a symbol of those who have passed due to Hepatitis C infection and to also protest the costs of new treatment drugs. So, some awareness today in the U.K. about the issue.

    Nice to hear you are having some nice cool weather over there and that you've been meditating more and noticed how beautiful the tree's looked today. The honeysuckle and roses filling the air as you sat in your new chair sounded so delightful and really serene.

    You were mentioning "depersonalization" which is truly an experience one can have while living with P.T.S.D. as you mentioned, a feeling of being spaced out or brain fog. As you also mentioned, there seems to be some kind of disruption in a sense of self integration. In my case, I was mentioning to a therapist I was seeing that, although individuals can have some understanding of what a soldier might experience after a war, in terms of P.T.S.D. Yet, it seemed to me that, individuals seemed to NOT really get it when it came to those who suffered horrible childhood abuse, he said to me, " the difference David between you and the soldier is that, most likely the soldier went to war a whole person and returned fractured, however David you never got the chance to become whole and have remained fractured your whole life.". My gosh, it was hard to hear at the time, yet, it was true and I never got the chance to form a whole identity. Most of my life I felt like an alien ! Today, I have healed some and day by day am becoming whole and forming a healthy identity.

    For I'm not the abuse that happened to me, nor the disease I live with. I'm the soul inside this body and am a child of God and have a right to be just me. As you are Jenny ! A beautiful soul doing the best you can everyday and serving individuals with the knowledge you have gained from your years of experience as a holistic healer. It is so important to honour ourselves and how we have survived, and healed a long the way. Though there may be more healing a long the way, we can trust in God's ability to guide us to just the right places, the right people, the right medicines we need.

    The counselling session was wonderful and this therapist is a really gentle soul, who is married to a north American native man who practices the spirituality of his people. So I look forward to the experiences with, Dr. Brenda Adams and I will take on this continuing journey of healing.

    Tonight, I'm watching the U.S. Democratic convention and the speech about to be delivered by Hillary Clinton. I'm not much of a political person, yet with Donald Trump it is a really strange process that is going on in the U.S. I'm so grateful that I live in Canada as you must be living in the wonderful countryside in which you reside.

    It is really great to connect with you and I wish you a very wonderful day tomorrow. God bless you Jenny. Have a nice sleep tonight and cuddle up with your beautiful cat. Best wishes to you. All the best David. :-)

  • Dear David and George,

    Your letters are always very meaningful and so welcome

    I've also felt like an alien,

    a word I've used myself to describe how I've felt..

    to myself as well as to others

    Think we're all a bit crazy,

    just that some ways of being/thinking have become part of consensus reality and thus accepted as 'normal'

    To have experienced all you have and survived it gives you an added exceptional dimension of humanity

    Mr and Mrs Marhaba and Petaluma Main Coon have their own penthouse suite..my attic room

    They have a table,monks' bench,double pet bed with furry throw

    and a single bed covered with another furry throw

    They have cat ornaments.paintings and lots of teddies,toys as Petaluma is maternal and likes to hold them in her paws

    They also sit in the garden on an old table with an awning if it gets too sunny...not much chance of that this summer in UK

    So they like to be together but still have their own space sometimes. They come into my room early in the morning and lie with me.

    They're both very loving cats

    So happy I rehomed them

    They were unwell and neglected when I first had them but by default not ill treated deliberately.

    Thanks for letting me know about Hep C day..i didn't know

    Always good/important to increase awareness where possible.

    Dr Adams sounds a really good therapist/person

    So pleased to hear about your refunding and sessions with her

    I worked as holistic healer not knowing I had Hep C till 6 years ago.

    Need time for myself now so not worked in nearly a year..

    great to have the time off and just potter.

    Looks like we have a new female P.M. very soon.

    Hope my benefits will still be the same.

    Also not that politically involved but i'm very anti hunting which is something the Conservatives endorse and participate in so wouldn't vote for them

    equivalent of your republicans I suppose

    Hope you've had a good day in Canada

    Seems so far away

    Great to be in touch.

    across the ocean

    Fond thoughts and wishes to you David and George :-)

  • Dear Jenny,

    It is true, that I've felt like an alien here on planet earth. Yet, as you've pointed out, going through things and surviving and moving forward can give one a unique view of humanity at times.

    I don't relate to the current things people seem to be interested in. Facebook, Smart Phones, Computer games, the current news, which is mostly violent and depressing. Now, at 53 I feel distanced from the rest of them. Not to put others down, I just feel this technological revolution is really making people more and more separate really.

    I ride the bus here in town, and no one really talks to each other much as they are busy with their text messages or what ever. It is interesting to be a witness to them, all entranced into their little phones.

    I spend most of my days puttering and going for walks when I can, and meditating. I'm hoping to do some hairdressing work as a volunteer for the retirement home, which I think I shared with you in a previous posting. Have not heard back from them. My therapist suggested I try to do some volunteer hairdressing for the homeless at the local shelter, I thought wow, what a wonderful idea. So next week I'm going to ring them up and see if they would like that.

    Your sharing about your cats gave me wonderful images as you mentioned them in the attic room and laying about in the garden outside. So great of you to take them in as they also give you great joy too. You know Jenny, I was reading your post and thought, wow you are such a wonderful writer and have such a lovely way with words. I can almost envision your home and the country side and your lovely garden out back. Have you ever considered writing a novel or book ? You really have a talent there.

    Yes, looks like you've a female P.M. now, Prime Minister May. Who knows were this world is going and like yourself I do not condone hunting as well, There is absolutely no reason for it at all. I just saw a photo of one of Donald Trumps son's on safari in Africa, beside an Elephant he had just shot.

    It brings tears to my eyes, they are such magnificent creatures, I can not understand what makes these people do such horrible things.

    Well, I'm not sounding to positive about the human race here tonight ! Maybe it is good I feel like an Alien....sometimes I just do not understand the way this old world is at times. I take solace in nature, when I go for my walks and watch the little hummingbirds come to the feeder on my balcony, they are so absolutely fascinating to me, the bright coloured Jewel tones of red and green. They land on the feeder with their tiny little feet and have a long drink and then..whoosh, they are off like a shot.

    It is hot here tonight once again and very, very humid, today in the morning my one and only fan gave out, so I needed to head to the shopping center and purchase a new one, thank goodness they were on sale at $19.99, which was more than affordable. I'm still recovering from the procedure and am having some cramps from time to time, expected I suppose but will keep monitoring any other symptoms. The surgeon shared with me that in some cases the procedure can case a cut or tear, in the colon or bowel and to let them know if I feel anything out of the ordinary or experience bleeding.

    Well, Jenny I hope you are having a wonderful evening in your little cottage by the moor. Sending you good vibrations and best wishes across the ocean from here in Canada, have a wonderful day tomorrow. Bye for now. David :-) and of course George too.

  • Hi David and George,

    Didn't know you had hairdressing skills..that's great,

    I had a best friend called Peter when I lived in a great little fishing/seaside town called Hastings.S.E.England

    He has HIV, from age 19,

    lived happily with his little dog Whoopie

    just round the block from me

    He'd been a hairdresser for many years with Vidal Sassoon in London

    Created miracles with my hair which is very long and wavy/curly

    Makes a lot of difference to how you feel esp. if female if your hair looks nice.

    Hastings was a wonderful place, still miss it

    An arty little town with great pubs,cafes,shopping

    very arty and friendly'

    No matter how strange you were

    you'd fit in and feel at home there

    In one pub, frequented by old hippies, the ceiling is papered with return train tickets.

    People who came to visit for day/weekend and just stayed

    It's very hilly,with funicular railways going up to the top of the West and East Hills.

    The Old Town imbetween in the valley imbetween with los of bric a brac/antique shops, only minutes from the sea.

    They had a Party On The Beach music festival each year with different bands, food stalls,mainly veggie

    Sometimes i'd walk up all the steps to my home on the West Hill as such good exercise

    Thanks for your kind comments David on my writing, very much appreciated

    Have a wonderful day, best you can

    and hope you're ok from the tests,

    no probs. with anything.

    Fond wishes and thoughts for you and George

    Jenny :-)

  • Dear Jenny,

    What a nice story about your dear friend Peter, he sounded like a really wonderful person and I love the name of his dog too.

    I was at Vidal Sassoon's in London for some training, now many years ago.

    Hastings sounds like a place I'd fit right into love the fact that the ceiling was covered in tickets too.

    You have a wonderful life over there Jenny.

    Having a Hep C day today and have not eaten much and have spent most of the day in bed. Just over come with fatigue and have no appetite.

    So, hopefully tomorrow I'll have some energy once again.

    Love your emails, there so wonderful. Take care for now. Blessings your way. David :-)

  • Hi David,

    I had a lovely day yesterday in one of my favourite places Boscastle

    If you should ever google Boscastle flood you would see a vid of the torrential downpour that caused the river running through this picturesque Cornish harbour village to overflow wiping out most of the village

    Thank God noone was hurt but must have been quite an experience that day for the rescuers and the villagers standing on their rooftops waiting to be winched to safety by our Royal Navy helicopters

    Now this lovely village has been rebuilt using all reclaimed materials so has still retained it's character.

    We walked along the river bank to the tea rooms where you have a great view of the harbour and the sea in the distance.

    They do a great carrot cake which is gluten free with no added sugar so I always treat myself to a slice

    In the Autumn there is Morris dancing,sort of folk dance with bells and wooden sticks used in celebration of the different solstices

    You could google Morris dance in Boscastle, very impressive and fun to watch

    Do hope you're feeling better and more energised David, feel like eating a bit more today, have to keep your strength up.

    May I put your name down with two excellent UK healing centres for free absent healing..do understand if you'd rather I didn't.

    They only need your name and area, no other details,

    I've been with them a month now and have felt a lot better.

    There's two..The White Eagle Lodge and Harry Edwards Healing Centre

    Again you could google and read about their work.

    Both have had excellent reviews here in UK

    My friend was given just two days,

    his family all came to visit him from Scotland.

    I called the Harry Edwards Centre for healing and within a week he'd been discharged from hospital.

    he was 78 at the time.

    You have been very well trained in your field of work.Vidal Sassoon is the top hairdressing school in Uk

    It's a skilled profession, and creative too

    Peter is still going strong in Hastings and he's been HIV for many years now

    Always appreciate your messages very much David,

    Fond thoughts and wishes to you and George

    Thinking of you both

    Jenny :-)

  • Hi Jenny,

    Good to hear from you again ! What a lovely life you have over there going to and fro visiting the villages near by. It sounds like it was quite a flood they had in Boscastle. Thank god no one was hurt, and isn't amazing the resilience for the town's folk to repair and rebuild after such a flood. It is nice to hear that the place still holds its charm and character.

    The carrot cake you had sounded very yummy, and gluten free and sugar free too, that is wonderful. I will Google Morris dance in Boscastle , I have to see this, it sounds really interesting to watch. Thank you so much for offering to put my name down at the U.K. healing centers you mentioned and of course that would be fine with me. It was quite a story to hear of your friends healing, that is remarkable !

    Yes, I had many years as a hairdresser, and had a large following. Usually a three month, booking ahead to get in to see me. I had such a lovely client base, made up of actors, media people, psychologists, a few doctors and business owners too. As well, many friends and people who were such a delight.

    In those days, in my profession many of us crazy hairdressers were out at night in the local night clubs dancing and doing all sorts of drugs. Hello Hep C. Although, I'm sure I acquired Hep C while on the streets of Toronto in the early eighties. So, I've been living with it some time now.

    I've been having a lot of symptoms lately, mostly extreme fatigue. However, it could also be due to the medicines I'm prescribed for P.T.S.D. I'm prescribed Oxazepam, Cipralex, and Mirtazapine and I feel that, the medicine might be too much on the liver. I'll need to go over things with my Doctor when I see him next. The colonoscopy was done and they removed three polyps, one they had some concern about, in that, the shape of it was mushroom shape, which can be worrying. I'll no more soon as they are sending the samples off for biopsy. As well, they found diverticula in the colon, which explains the bleeding I experience at times.

    It was also great to hear the your friend Peter is still going strong. I'm so grateful for the medications they have now for individuals who are living with H.I.V. I was around in the early eighties, and watched many friends succumb to the disease. It was horrible in those days, no one lived more that two or three years after diagnosis. I remember when there were only 30 individuals in San Francisco, a handful of individuals in New York, and where I lived, Toronto, there were 12 individuals presenting at hospitals and no one knew what it was. I ravaged the gay communities and we lost so many, so young. Really wonderful people and many were hairdresser friends I knew. Today, it is really now a manageable illness.

    Hep C seems to be in some ways H.I.V.'S poorer, and lesser know cousin. We did not get the media attention and the funding in such an urgent way. Hopefully, things will change.

    Well, I'm feeling a little better today and am going to make a nice vegetarian stir fry with lots of veggies and Tofu. I've a busy week ahead and must make some time to pick some more blackberries before their time it up.

    As always Jenny, it is so wonderful to hear from you and the adventures you go on in your area. Best wishes and a big hug to you and your cats too. Take care. David. :-)

  • P.S. I saw the Morris Dancing on YOUTUBE, amazing no one gets hit the head or the hands LOL...it was really nice to watch.

  • This is my 3rd reply this eve to you David..

    They were long messages and just disppeared off he screen so fingers crossed for this one

    Thinking of you re test results

    Even if you need some treatment focus on everything turning out fine

    I used to frequent gay pubs and clubs in my home city.

    I'd always felt an outsider in life

    but I was always met by warmth and humour there

    So sorry you experienced the loss of good friends

    I used to love Freddie Mercury and Qeen

    Saw them a few times live

    What an outstanding entertainer Freddie was, sadly missed by so many

    Hope you enjoyed your veggie meal, sounds delicious

    I buy braised tofu in tins, so tasty

    It's different than white tofu,

    in that it's brown in colour and in a savoury sauce..no additives.

    It's been stormy all day so I've been in, tidying up and rearranging furniture

    In my small sitting room I've fairyrlights everywhere,

    looks quite magical at night,

    the décor is a bit hippyish,

    ethnic carpets and candles etc

    I'm 61 now and Sophie,my daughter is 43

    I've a grandson Jakey, who's so bright and adorable

    They are both blonde like my ex husband.

    They were living in Thailand, on a beautiful island called Koh Samuit five years but are home now so Jakey can get a good education

    Big hugs to you and George too

    Very Best Wishes to you both

    Jenny

  • Forgot to say you must be some great hairdresser for people to be queuing up in the way they did

    Quite an accolade for your expertise and work

    Going on my nightly snail/slug look out now

    I throw them over my fence into field,

    They eat all my flowers otherwise

    Pleased you enjoyed the Morris

    It's always a good atmosphere as it celebrates nature and the equinoxes.

    Always great to read your messges David

    Bye till next time

  • Dear Jenny

    I can not tell you how wonderful it is to communicate with you via this site. Your a really special soul and I'm grateful to be in contact with you

    I've ben in a funk, and feel at times there is no hope. Inside I know this wrong, yet the mental feelings persist.

    Connecting with you has been such a joy in my life, you are so very much positive and it is refreshing to hear fro you.

    It is challenging to not only live with he compilations of Hep C, but to also be living with the devastating diagnosis of complex P.T.S.D.

    It is complicated and intuitively I realize how the conditions are related, at times I just feel "what is the point" It is then I receive an email from you sharing with me the life you have near Cornwall and your journeys around your area

    I just want to thank you so much for your correspondence and hope. You are having a nice day, god bless you for being the amazing person you are. Best wishes to you. David :-)

  • Bless you David for your wonderful comments and want you to know they mean a great deal to me.

    It's been such a joy to correspond with you.

    It's really important David to discipline our minds to focus on the good and the positives in our lives and be grateful for all of them

    Then we attract more to be grateful about

    It's called The Law Of Attraction and works through our subconscious minds.

    When we think/focus it is like a self hypnosis instruction to the sub. mind that cannot analyse

    If we say we feel awful, then the sub. attracts more to feel awful about,

    if we think how grateful we are then the sub.attracts more for us to be grateful about.

    There is a little book called'The Secret' that explains it better than I can

    So worth reading and I highly recommend'Harmonic Prayer' by Alan Tutt too

    I've had a wonderful outing today with my old friend Brian who i've known since I moved to Cornwall 16 years ago

    He's diabetic,on insulin and is a lovely,very understanding person

    He spent most of his life caring for his elderly adoptive parents.

    He was found on a beach at low tide and still has the newpaper clippings about it

    His adoptive parents were great,he was very lucky.

    We went to a little place called Tintagel which is the alleged home of King Arthur and his knights of the round table

    Every gift shop sells mini escaliburs..the sword in the lake that Lancelot finds..in the story.

    We had lunch in a little café overlooking Cornwalls' dramatic rocky coast with the sea close by

    It was quite windy today and the waves were high with lots of bobbing surfers on their boards

    I had a baked potato with veggie chilli and a large side salad

    really enjoyable on a cool,windy day like today

    David..you have to make a point that's the point..make everyday as enjoyable and worthwhile as you can for you and George too

    In spite of/because of it all

    Don't let the so & so's get you down..people,circumstances etc

    You can triumph over it all with Gods' help too.

    Thinking of you David and George,

    You have what it takes to get through all this and out the other side

    Hope you can change your meds if need be to more liver friendly ones

    Fondest wishes/thoughts for you and George

    Jenny :-)

  • Bless you too Jenny,

    I too really look forward to hearing from you. It has been a joy for me as well, to have the connection with you.

    I've been in quite a funk these days and have been in a negative space, hence I've felt so fatigued and tired. I thank you so much for your suggestions on focusing on gratitude. It is so important and I certainly am aware of the book called " The Secret" and the law of attraction it puts forth.

    I used to keep a gratitude journal and found that helpful, maybe it is time to start that practice once again. As well, the meditation and prayer helps so much too and I continue to practice that. Tomorrow, I'll be seeing the new counsellor I mentioned to you previously. She's seems a very kind soul and the type of therapy she does is called response based therapy. So, I look forward to seeing her tomorrow.

    What a story your friend Brain has, to be left on a beach and found and then adopted. You mentioned he struggles with diabetes too and requires insulin. He sounds like a very kind soul and has looked after his adopted parents, what strength he has, amazing.

    Tintagel sounds like a lovely place and of course the story of King Arthur and the knights of the round table is a story I really love. In fact, I've always been attracted to the English country side. My grandmother and grandfather were both from Ireland, and I've though of applying for my Irish passport, as on can be "grand mothered" in Ireland to receive Irish citizenship. I have a copy of her birth certificate which is quite large in size, she was born in 1907 in county Kerry. Maybe I just might get the rest of the documentation and then visit one day.

    You are so true to say" don't let the so-called so & so's " get to me. Sometimes I'm far too sensitive and take on the judgements of other. I need at times to strengthen my back bone.

    I know with God's help I'll definitely rise above al this. Thanks Jenny for your kind words of support, it means a great deal to me.

    I'm definitely going to go over my current med's with my Doctor and see what we can come up with. Benzodiazepines are very hard on the liver.

    Well Jenny, your most likely fast asleep as it is about 2:00 a.m. where you are, so I'm sending you some good wishes and thoughts, I hope you have a wonderful day tomorrow. As always, take good care, bye for now. David. :-)

  • Please watch this David and his other healing EFT vids

    They really work to clear all the neg. stuff. One for clearing trauma too.

    Releasing Emotional Pain - Tapping with Brad Yates - YouTube

    You mention being upset by the PTSD diagnosis

    Although you can't change what happened

    You can give yourself an additional diagnosis of being able to clear the negative effects of it

    I absolutely love Ireland and the Irish I've known

    Great humour,eccentricity and 'the craic'..helped on by a good few drinks.

    My ex husband was from Northern Ireland, a little seaside/fishing village called Ballywalter

    I lived there from 18 to 21

    You could walk out of our front door,cross over a little narrow road and be on the beach in 3 secs.

    My brother in law still lives in the village which has hardly changed in 40 years.

    It would be so great for you to visit Ireland,see where your people are from

    I thought you were Scots as your surname is from Scotland.

    As it's stopped raining i'm going shopping in Liskeard which is the nearest small market town to me

    It's got a good community centre where they have different meetings/art groups etc and a very friendly veggie café in the basement

    There is artwork for sale at very reasonable prices on the walls and some sculpture too.

    So David hoping you've had a better day andfeeling more positive and hopeful

    Sending you and George fond good wishes and healing thoughts

    Jenny :-)

  • Dear Jenny,

    I'm familiar with the EFT system of tapping to relieve negative emotions and anxiety, yet I'll definitely watch the video's on You Tube.

    Nice to hear about the years you spent in Ireland. Ballywalter sounds like a wonderful place. I'd love to visit Ireland and see where my family came from. My surname was originally spelled McLeod, however, some time around 1880 someone changed the spelling to MacLeod. I suppose that it was because, there had been a change from the Catholic religion to the Anglican religion. Who knows in these cases ? In those days there was so much focus on ones religion.

    Liskeard sounds like a lovely place and one I'd enjoy. I love any place where there is an outlet for artists to display and sell their artworks.

    Jenny I must share with you that since having the colonoscopy I've not been very well. It seems to have triggered the P.T.S.D. and I feel very unwell and very activated in terms of the P.T.S.D.

    I suppose that the Amygdala in my brain is on overload and my system is pumping a great deal of Adrenaline and Cortisol . I could not put my finger on what had occurred, yet I'm getting a sense that, "Body Memories" were triggered. I'm having horrible nightmares at night and it is all very disturbing.

    I met with my therapist and we talked about it and will try to do some work around it and try to diffuse the out put of adrenaline and cortisol. So, your suggestion to try using some EFT comes at a very good time and I'll be trying some tapping to see if that is effective. So, thanks so much for the reminder.

    Just having a quiet evening and will soon be off to bed as I'm feeling exhausted and need to just rest. I hope that you are doing well, and wish you a wonderful day tomorrow. Take good care for now. David.

  • Concerned to hear how you've been feeling David

    I've always found the Bach Flower Rescue Remedy effective and could not have coped at times without i

    Could you pray that God/His Angels heal the source of your nightmares and guide you to what may help you.

    And give thanks for that healing/guidance throughout the day

    The tapping isn't a one off but best done few times a day.

    then effect increases each time I've found

    do hope you feel much better very soon David

    Just write when you're ready

    Wish I lived nearer and could help you more

    Thinking very fondly of you and George

    and send you both healing thoughts and wishes.

    Hugs from me,Marhaba and Petaluma xxx

  • Hi Jenny, I've been really physically depleted and have been sleeping the last few days. Just can not seem to recover.

    However, I'm trusting that it is what I'm needing to do at this time.

    Anyhow, just wanted to thank you for your always positive message. I feel in time my system will balance itself out. I'm totally familiar with Bach Flower remedies and of course, rescue remedy. It has helped in the past some. P.T.S.D. is a tricky disorder and sometimes one just has to go through the veil and slowly come out the other side.

    Definitely, I've been making a conscious contact with God asking for assistance and understanding.

    I wish you lived closer too, I'd love to have a cup of tea with you, and maybe go on one of your adventures.

    Speaking of your adventures, what have you been up to over last few days? Hope all is well for you and Marhaba and Petaluma. Hugs from me and George from across the big water (ocean). :-)

  • This is my last time on this site David due to very hurtful,unpleasent messages from someone else.

    My e mail address is sarah0032@talktalk.net if you'd like to carry on messaging off site.When I hear from you i'll reply at length

    All good wishes to you and George as always

  • Hi Jenny, it is so sad that some of these site contain individuals who are petty and unkind in their comments. However, good for you for making the decisions to leave the sit, I'll contact you at your email site, thanks you for entrusting me with you private email address. Will contact you in a few moments. Hugs to you and yours. David xo.

  • sarah0032@talktalk.net

    Let me know again David if you can't get through and i'll continue on this site

  • Dear Jenny, tried to send you an email yet, It was unsuccessful. Hope I have your email address correct. Please let me know otherwise I'll keep trying, hope you are o.k. hugs to you Jenny. David xo

  • It's zero zero three two not nought

    Don't know reason can't get through..also make sure lower case and dot in right place

    Do hope it works if not i'll stay on site just to message you David as I don't want to lose touch unless of course your choice.

    Best Wishes and hugs to you and George

  • meant number0 not letter O

  • Hi again David,

    This person has been very offensive and nasty

    I've not reported it as he's not well mentally or physically

    but I've had enough now and i'm not corresponding with this person any more

    Hope they get the help they need

    That just leaves you to write to David and it has been wonderful to correspond with such a nice,decent person as yourself

    Have you tried to e mail me again?

    I have to shop now David but will write more when I get home

    Hope you're feeling bit better

    Big hugs from me,Marhaba and Petaluma

  • Ps just wanted to add you have done so well to be where you are now and to be the nice,decent person you are

    in spite of/because of your history

  • Thanks so much Jenny and you as well. Hope your having a wonderful day ! <3

  • It's 7.30pm here in Uk, been into town to buy Petalumas' food..

    she enjoys a varied cuisine so buy different pouches of Royal Canine each week..last week she liked salmon flavour ,today not interest

    Have a great day too

  • Ps Good luck with the colon cleanse, and lucky that your doctor so good, you're getting the help you've needed and helping yourself too with everything you've disovered on your journey .

  • David, I was just diagnosed yesterday. I already feel isolated.

  • Sorry to hear that you were just diagnosed yesterday, it is a very hard thing to go through, when a doctor, tell you that you have hepatitis C. You are not alone, and there many new drugs available and there will most likely be more to come in the future. Hang in there , and very best wishes your way.

  • Hi David,

    I too have PTSD and adhd, I was just dx with hep c days ago. I'm just beginning this journey, I also feel isolated because I don't know who to trust taking about it. Can we be friends?

  • Dear Becca,

    Of course we can be friends, I'd welcome that. I' m sorry you were just diagnosed. Hep C is a difficult illness to live with, yet there are upcoming treatments, which will be more affordable. I understand your concern about living with P.T.S.D. AND A.D.H.D. they usually come together as a diagnosis. I'm unaware just where your P.T.S.D. AND A.D.H.D. COME FROM, WERE YOU ABUSED AS A CHILD ? If so, I can only share with you the things I have learned over many years in trying to deal with these disorders. Most importantly, realize you are more that you diagnosis's you are a beautiful soul, who has experienced a natural reaction to unnatural circumstances. Trauma is the mind and bodies way of dealing with unnatural events and abuse. Life is hard Becca, yet for those of us who share on this site, we help support each other in ways that can only be possible to those who have been there !

    If your comfortable to share with me what happened to you, maybe I can be of some help. I know trust is hard for us. So, only share what you are comfortable with. I wish you a wonderful evening and a good sleep free of nightmares and flask backs. If your comfortable, contact me and we can share some more. In love and light. David. :-)

  • David,

    Here is my story~ At the age of 6-7 my step dad started molesting me. First grade I was diagnosed with hyper activity and mom tried diet control with no red dyes. I grew up confused and Misunderstood. I started gaining weight at the age of 11 or 12. My step dad died when I was 13 and felt that I had wished him dead. At the age of 15 my mom remarried and move me to another town which we moved all the time anyway, all I wanted was for people to like me, I wanted and needed a friend because at home I had always been different. I way large and my mom and sister were so tiny. I wasn't pretty like my sister. She hated me. At 16 I left home and became bulimic and lost down to 100 pounds by the age of 18. I married and troubled man had three kinds and left him when the childern were babies. I stared nursing school, open graduation we had divorced and live fairly close because he help me a lot babysitting. The weekend of graduation he trip me in my car and pulled a gun then chocked me down yelling watch what you have have done to me and pulled the trigger. I am forever scarred, he didn't die that night but as haunted me many night. the next week claiming to be ok I began to seven your career as a paramedic. There I learned to drink. Can years later in a full-blown alcoholic newly divorced again both first and second husband were killed in the same way can years later in a full-blown alcoholic newly divorced again both first and second husband were killed in the same way week and the flash backs now more powerful than ever with alcohol and seven years of distorted trauma from all kinds in my poster medic stress kick in full force. It was jumbled together. I then went to to forget and chose the drug methamphetamines to help me do that my first encounter was shooting it up. I lived that life for seven years. Sick in my addiction my third has been found me much older than I was but loved me when I couldn't let myself. What the He with the help of the law enforcement and bad choices I got three years of treatment during that time my third husband died of a heart attack. I'm sober now 8 years, 7 years stop smoking, three years good eating happens and drinking water. Been having health issues for a long time now but just found the hepatitis four days ago. God in my life and good people.

  • Dear Becca,

    Your story is traumatizing and it is amazing that you have survived. Like your self I too experienced early childhood abuse too. I don't know how or why, we as traumatised people continue to bring trauma into our lives and this is better spoken about by, Dr. Gabor Mate and his book, " In the realm of the hungry ghost". He can be found on YouTube and he really explains things very well in terms of trauma.

    I too have used drugs and alcohol to numb my pain. I was also an injection drug user too, which seems to be common with those of us who have experienced early childhood trauma.

    I certainly can not imagine the loss of your husbands and what that must have been like for you.

    It is good you have some good people in your life and a God of your understanding. Really I feel the only hope one can have in healing is a spiritual life to help us get through the hard times and to be grateful for in the good times.

    Lately, I've been having a really hard time, and am experiencing the effects of P.T.S.D. in that, I'm not leaving my home much, and am in a depression and of course the suicidal thoughts come. Living with Hep C, C-P.T.S.D., and other medical problems, it is really challenging.

    However, it is good to connect with other's like you, who are also experiencing the same challenges. You sound like a really strong individual and you've survived so very much. I guess we are all kind of, the walking wounded and have scars that we have to live with, it is not easy....I hope that tomorrow you have a wonderful day and that tonight you can sleep. Best wishes to you. David.

  • Dear David,

    I'm so glad that I've had the pleasure of knowing you. Did you sleep well? I understand the hyper sensitive state (what I call it.). Where sounds and my sourounding are fearful. When I'm to afraid to put my feet on the floor moreless take a shower or even go potty. The water sounds bother me. That comes and goes depending on the traumatizing situations that enters my life. I had not had a flashback in a while.

    Please tell me more about you if your comfortable. I have thought about sucide but only when I was a child. After what my ex husband did to me when he put a 9mm to his head and pulled the trigger. I could never never hurt someone else by finding my body dead therefor thoughts of killing myself has never been a option. Pls can when have a closer contact like text so that if you ever need to talk I could be here for you?

    When I got sober 8 years ago I gain stenght, faith and courage. I know so many that still live in that bondage even family. This hep c seems to be apart of the fight I've already been fighting. ive been sick all of my life mentally or by self, with self love issues and feeling less then others which honestly as of four days ago I was consumed with obsessing body issues and the bulimic was creeping back. My mind hasn't stop obsessing since I was a kid unless I was medicating myself. This is just a new obsession. Since I don't know much about the Disease what kind I have or how bad I have it. My mind is have a hay day and I'm dying tomorrow.

    I hope you have a good day.

    Your friend Rebecca

  • Dear Rebecca,

    Thanks for your message. Those of us who, have been traumatized especially in early childhood are very, very sensitive to our surroundings and the people who cross our path. We seem to be more in touch with our "gut" feelings, these are the feelings a child feels and it is important to acknowledge these feelings. For often these feelings are true. It seems to me that the vast majority of people, or as like to call them "sheeple" have lost touch with their gut feelings. Intuition. So, they seem to live in their head and rely on the intellect to tell them what to do and what decisions to make. Often, they make the wrong decisions and can not figure out what went wrong. The gift of being a traumatized person is that, we are very, very much in touch with our intuition, it is what has saved us so many times. Just think about it.

    I'm very much sensitive to the world situation and the forces of evil that are perpetuating an influence on all of our lives. One has to really honour the part of us which, we can not deny. I don't know about you, but I see so many people totally asleep. Somehow, once again the gift of trauma points to another way.

    I was at my Doctors today and he will be doing an RNA viral load to see how much of the virus is in my body. I will be seeing my therapist tomorrow and working more on the P.T.S.D. and the symptoms it causes in my mind and body.

    All I can really share with you is that Meditation helps a great deal and also finding a good therapist to work with. We are living in very, very difficult times and some how we all need to try to connect to God and heal. It is no easy feat, yet it is the only way I know. So, although this message might seem a little pessimistic. It is all I have to offer you, other than friendship and a connection through adversity.

    I wish you all the best and hope tonight you sleep well and that tomorrow brings you a brighter day. Best wishes to you. David.

  • Morning David,

    I just saw this message, I'm new on here so I'm trying to find my way.

    I'm waiting on some test but I'm not sure what kinda test. Doctor said it will tell me what kind and how bad. Monday can not come soon enough. I've been drinking probodic drinks and taking the vit that has been recommend on these sits. Look like there is allot of info that say just the opposite of each other on line. Which just has me more confused. I must wait till I see the specialist. Damnit! I hate waiting. I have had a horable few days because sugar is my addiction. I have a night eating problem and can eat whole bag of candy in one night. I can't have it in my house but I convinced myself that I could eat Akins candy and it would be ok, I ate the whole box. I woke up and body was swollen, my tummy blotted and a headache from hell. I'm still sick. I hope your doing ok David hope to hear from you soon

    Rebecca

  • Dear Rebecca,

    Good to hear from you, and sorry for taking so long to reply. I've been down and needing lots of sleep. Like yourself I've had lots of tests lately. I'll be getting the results this week. Then I've some blood panels to do for Hep C. It is good you are doing some good things for yourself like taking probiotic's, BIO K is a really good one to take. Are you taking Milk thistle ? It is really helpful as well as Dandelion root tea. Also Alpha lipoic acid is helpful too. You can check some of this stuff out on line. I'm no Doctor yet, I've been living with Hep C now for about 25 years. As well, I'm diagnosed with complex post traumatic stress disorder too and hemocromatosis ( which is very high iron levels in the blood and it often binds to the liver and effects other organs as well) I love sugar too, and it is my down fall at times. I've love ice cream too with lots of caramel sauce ! ...LOL. Well, we are not perfect, so don't beat yourself up about it, we usually pay for it the next day with a horrible hangover. Nowadays, I find that when I get a sweet craving I have a piece of toast with peanut butter and lots of honey and it seems to do the trick and it is good for me too. Well, I like to thinks so. Remember to drink lots of water Rebecca, at least 8 glasses a day. Also apple cider vinegar is helpful too, just a teaspoon daily with a glass of water. I've received a great deal of support and help from a member who used to be on this site and she is a holistic healer. So I learnt lots from her, a really sweet person. However, take time to check the internet for alternatives for HepC. Run things by your doctor, if your unsure about some supplements. One of the most powerful things one can take is Turmeric. A spice from India with lots of healing properties, my doctor told me to use it and it had helped, especially with bloating a gas problems. It also has healing properties for the liver too. Well, I hope all goes well for you, take good care of yourself and I'm sending you a big hug and lots of light your way. David. :-)

  • David,

    Got my test results today, I have genotype 1A.

    My Viral load is 1,235,873. Iu/ml

    6.09 log/ml

    Do you know if my numbers to high that I can't get treatment?

  • Dear Rebbeca,

    You and I have the same genotype, I have 1a too. Your viral load is high, usually it is about 800,000 lu/ml. However, don't freak out the numbers go up and down quite a bit and the virus might just be really active at this time. For sure you can get treatment Rebecca, and most likely will, it will take time. Mostly, they will do more testing and it might involve a liver biopsy. I've had two biopsies, there not fun to go through, yet take very little time. They might also do a liver fibroscan as well, or a liver ultrasound. Both of these procedures are totally painless, they are done to see if there is cirrhosis occurring in the liver.

    Drink lots of water Rebecca, now, I have just found out that "Blueberry" Leaf slows down the replication of the virus and can reduce the numbers. So, it might be worth a try to go to your local health food store and inquire about it. Once again, I'm no doctor, however...this seems to have been helpful for some of the individuals I've corresponded with on the Hep C sites.

    It must be really terrifying for you right now and I get a sense you are really overwhelmed, that is totally understandable. However, in time you'll have more information and will have more to go on. It is important to check your urine too ( if it is really dark) water is a must. At times you may notice your stool may change colour from dark to a pale clay colour. Once again drink more water. You might have to pee a lot, but your body needs it. Stay away from sugar if you can, check out getting some "Milk Thistle" supplements too. They use milk thistle here in Canada in the hospital if someone is in serious cirrhosis. So even the medical system uses it, so it must be of some help.

    I'd also advise that you buy some turmeric and add one teaspoon of it to a glass of water and drink it a few times a day. It is very helpful and it's just a spice. STAY AWAY FROM USING ANY ASPIRIN, TYLENOL, OR ANYTHING CONTAINING A.S.A. It is really hard on the liver. I imagine by now you might be experiencing, headaches, Joint pain, gas, and are probably really, really tired a lot. Take time and rest all you can.

    Many of us have lived for a long time with Hep C, and just know that new treatments are coming out almost monthly. So, try to remember that, the numbers are just an indication of how much of the virus is in your body. Your liver might be just fine. In fact the liver is an amazing organ and can keep functioning even when it is severely damaged, it also can repair itself too.

    I wish I was there to give you a big hug Rebecca, so just know I'm sending you one here. Try to get lots of rest and try if you can to distract your mind from worrying too much, I know that is hard, yet when we gets stressed out, it sends lots of adrenaline and cortisol into the body and your liver does not need that right now. So, sleep well my friend if you can and I hope that tomorrow is a better day. Take care. David :-)

  • Hi David,

    Please could you resend your e mails a my computer went down and I lost all my messages.

    Great to hear from you and i'll write back soon as I have your e mail address again.

    Bye for now Jenny (sarah)

  • No worries Jenny, hope that you are well and that life is good. Look forward to hearing from you a some point. Love and Peace. David

  • Please can you resend your e mail address to my e mail David as I can't reply to you without it

    .I lost all my address details so don't have yours to reply to you or the e mails you sent couple of days ago.

    Hope things are better in Duncan and tests results ok.

    Love to you and George..Jenny.

  • Dear Jenny,

    I'm having trouble with my email site too, when I go to log in, I get asked a bunch of questions and the am given a code to sign in ? Then I have to go to another site to get the code and then back to my usual address and type in the code. Very weird. So, maybe we can continue to communicate here on HU ? Hope that all is well for you Jenny and that you've figured out your email issues. I'm doing o.k. and will be seeing my therapist tomorrow. Hope to hear from you, and I hope

    this site is secure. Maybe it is just a glitch on my email server yet, these days you just never know. Take good care for now, sending you a big hug. David :-)

  • Hi David

    I've had further warning from Admin at Heath Unlocked and may be struck off site,

    I am now unable to discuss what happened on any forums.

    My messages re being read by admin.

    If you don't hear from me that is reason.

    Of course you can always e mail me when you are ready

    Thanks so much for your kind words/support,

    All good wishes to you David and George

    Jenny.

  • Dear Jenny,

    That is just crazy...hope that you are doing o.k. Jenny and all is well at home. Hope to at least see you on the Hep C site. Take care for now, David.

  • Hi David,

    I'm banned now from PTSD site

    I'm unable to write freely

    Best for you too not to comment here on recent events

    I've apologised to all concerned , can still use Hep C site.

    Hope all your tests were ok

    I'm going for feta protein test end of the month

    as recommended on site

    I'm keeping this brief David

    Hope your e mail facility is sorted soon

    Warm good wishes to you and George

    Jenny

  • Dear Jenny,

    Sorry to hear that you are banned from the P.T.S.D. site, that just crazy. As I mentioned previously I too am going to have the same test done later this month too. My viral load was at 400,000 ul. Yet I was told that that is not too high and that I should not worry too much.

    I'll also be getting the iron levels checked out and alt test too. Things are going o.k. and I'm continuing to see my therapist who is really nice and the therapy is hard yet, healing.

    Today I'm off to our local Walmart to do some shopping. It is so hard to just leave the house, I find it really activating and encounter a great deal of P.T.S.D. symptoms, mostly anxiety and fear. It seems that, that is just the way it is with this disorder.

    As I've gotten older in life, the P.T.S.D. seems to worsen and at times find it hard to simply function. Often I sleep a lot and experience very severe depression. As mentioned to you previously, in the back drop of my mind is always some form of suicidal ideation. Not that I've plans yet at times the thoughts can become very powerful. Last week I needed to call the suicide hotline just to speak to someone, and it did help some.

    I hope that you are doing good Jenny and that the coming months bring you good health and peace. I often find the fall a wonderful time to let go of things and start a new.

    My little George is doing good and is his usual little fat self, he such a big cat. Not that I over feed him, he came that way when he was rescued from the pound now 13 year ago. He is such a comfort and a very loving cat.

    Well my friend, I hope you have a wonderful day and that your two little ones are doing good. Take care for now. David. xo

  • I wonder if there are any very cheap phone rates from UK to Canada..maybe you could call me if you felt bad

    i'll google.

    It's so helpful to be able to call a phone line at night/anytime

    Talk to a caring stranger as sometimes that feels easier than a friend

    Some time ago now,in my twenties, I slept away good few years with fibromyalgia and depression.

    I've had a very chequered past,

    stuff I haven't mentioned before.

    The last twenty years though I've worked from home treating sports injuries/reflexology etc.

    I've ITEC diplomas..can use anywhere in world as good, long accredited courses

    Before that things were a bit different but here is not the place to go into that.

    I do wish we lived nearer and you could call me anytime you needed to

    Things haven't been that easy here either

    I can enjoy being alone,meditating etc but you can have too much of a good thing

    Not easy in Cornwall without a car now and no bus service

    No neighbours either except for sheep as I live on the edge of the moor..bet they're more congenial that a lot of people.

    I love Autumn to

    All the beautiful warm leaf colours and mellow light

    I do hope David you start to feel much better

    It's too hard for you at the moment

    Sending you and George love and all healing wishes

    Jenny

  • Hi David

    It's been quite a while since hearing from you and hope I've not written anything to upset you.

    Do hope you're ok..i'm concerned about you

    Love as always to you and George

  • Dear Jenny,

    What a joy to hear from you ! Hope that you are doing good and having some fun where you live. I've been in therapy, as I think I shared with you.

    It has been difficult at times and I feel I'm beginning the hard climb out of a very deep depression. My blood last panel tests indicated high levels yet nothing too much over the normal indicators.

    I'm going to pick up some Blueberry extract and I know what I'm looking for in terms of the active ingrediant, which has been shown to lower replication of the virus, by a Japanse team of doctors. So, thanks for the info about that. I'll be getting some other suppliments as well.

    Mostly, I'm been trying to get out more and doing a great deal of meditations to assist in healing.

    So how are you these days ? It is always good to hear from you and am sending you hugs and postive energy.

    David :-)

  • Ps So pleased to read you are coming out of depression

    Hope you get better and better David

    Each day in every way

  • Wonderful to hear from you again David

    Read up also on lactobacillus Bulgaricus which articles have indicated can dramatically reduce symptoms/VL and has also cleared people of virus

    No figures mentioned

    It is suspected full research info has been blocked by drug companies

    I've just ordered a course from Amazon Uk..only place I can find that sells it

    Are you still seeing your therapist?..she sounds wonderful, attuned on many levels

    You were lucky to find her David

    I didn't know you'd replied to me

    HU didn't tell me

    Just looked up by chance on Global site

    Best blueberry extract ,most potent,is sold on LLoyd Wrights' site

    Too expensive for me to import so I buy Swansons on Amazon UK

    Good to hear you're getting out/about more David

    I need to do that, tend to hibernate in the Autumn/winter

    Love to you and George

    Hugs to you both.

    Jenny :-)

  • Dear Jenny,

    Good to hear from you ! As well good news about the lactobacillus Bulgaricus I'll need to look it up on the internet, thanks for the information. I did get some whole Blueberry leaf and am taking it as a tea. I did see the Blueberry extract on the internet and like you have mentioned, it is really expensive. So, for now I'll keep brewing my tea which I have at night.

    My blood counts are good, yet I do have some symptoms arising as the weather changes here, mostly joint pain. How about you ? How are you doing? Like yourself I tend to hibernate during the winter months too.

    I'm still seeing the therapist and things seem to be improving and as I mentioned before I'm getting out a little more often, which is good. We have a major storm coming this weekend and the beginning of it has just started, it is part of a Typhoon from Japan, so lot's of warnings about power outages and flooding too.

    I really am happy to hear from you Jenny, keep warm in your little home on the Moor's and both George and I are sending you big hugs from here in Canada. Take care for now. Best wishes. David. :-)

  • Ps my not so great photo now up on 'my profile' page

    taken today by Brian as we were walking along a nearby river path

    lots of colorful ducks and other wildfowl

    only walk there in Autumn (Fall )/Winter as adders abound in the Spring/Summer and not that safe if you trod on one unawares

    Bye till next time

    Jenny :-)

  • Dear Jenny,

    What a treat to see you ! You look amazing and have the features of a true Celt. I will message you tomorrow and I too should put a picture up. My poor old George is experiencing symptoms of arthritis so I've been researching ways to help him on the internet. Lots of good information and ways to ease his pain. Hope you and Brian have a lovely evening in your east Indian temple on the Moors. David. :-)

  • Great to see big handsome George,

    He looks very well fed

    Strange I do look Celtic

    As my background is East European Jewish

    From Vladivostok on paternal side

    Romania on maternal

    My first husband was Irish

    The second Scots

    I like the Celts

    And their art/culture

    Not the heavy drinking though

    Do hope George's arthritis gets much better

    and you find the right,safe holistic med. online for him

    time to feed P&M

    So bye for now David & George

    Big hugs to you both

  • Good to hear from you Jenny,

    Hope that you and Brian had a wonderful evening. Your descriptions of the interior of your home soound very lovely and warm. I love, East Indian antiques and pillows and lamps. My home has a bit of that too their is an abundance of Buddha's every where lots of candles and incense and essential oils too, and crystals.

    It must be so cozy and warm in your place on a cold fall day. How fantastic it must be. The storm here has finally passed, however there were many power outages and tree's which fell during the high winds. It seems to have passed by us here in Duncan B.C. and mostly seemed to have hit the lower mainland (Vancouver) and the sate of Oregon.

    So glad you like the pictures Jenny, it was great to see you too. As well, you've now seen my George, such a sweet cat. I'm adding a little pure Olive oil to his food and will also try a little glucosamine to just little bits of food at a time. He has to loose weight too. So, there be a little upset with this on his part, yet it is for his own good.

    May your evening be wonderful and I wish I was there having some tea with you in your little temple on the Moors. Take it easy Jenny and once again thanks for your correspondence, it means a great deal to me. Bye for now. David . :-)

  • Ps Thanks David for your kind comments on my photo

    Much appreciated!

    i'm not that pale, just came out like that

    :-)

  • I've just seen your photo too on your profile

    You look absolutely lovely!!!

  • Good to hear from you too David,

    As always,

    Found something else which has proven cure (so it is written) for chronic hep c

    Have just e mailed the Dr for consultation

    ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articl...

    Keep safe in the storm David

    Brewing tea from the leaf should still work well

    Have my woodburner on again in the evening

    This is the coldest part of Cornwall as highest on the moor

    I'm into vintage Indian furniture/mirrors etc

    My little cottage looks like a mini Indian temple

    Temple bells hanging in one corner,

    a mirror that's come down in the world from the Havelli Palace, Jaipur to my miners' cottage here in Cornwall

    I feel good most of time David but i'm used to ignoring and pushing through

    When I had all my pets I had no choice

    Since I've been self medicating I've felt a lot better

    Do hope your joint pain eases

    Can you use a herbal ointment?

    I've Brian here thiseve.

    We've been out for the day,supermarket shop and walk/lunch at a farm café

    with panoramic views over Cornwall and Devon too

    I'll go now David to prepare our eve meal

    Big Hugs to you and George too

    Thinking of you and George very fondly

    Jenny :-)

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