Sexual Health Bordering Anxiety - Hepatitis C Trust

Hepatitis C Trust

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Sexual Health Bordering Anxiety

benshat profile image
2 Replies

Hi All,

In the early hours of Saturday November 8th 2014 I was in a Gay Bar in Manchester where I kissed one guy around three or four times and another guy kisses me on each cheek but I thought at first he had bitten me on the cheek; however a security guard and a photo showed he had not bitten me and my first thought was could I have anything? I got home about five am and went to bed.

When I got up around 11AM I phoned The Sexual Health Line who said no need to worry and I then started thinking as I was walking around various men did I kiss someone's fly hole and again I was told no need to panic.

The lady on the SHL was more concerned about my anxiety and as the evening went on I was thinking how when a guy kissed me did my lip get bitten but again nothing showing outside the lip but inside the mouth looked tender but I would remember if someone had gone inside; I phoned SHL and again no need to worry.

I was starting to think it was all my anxiety again and trying to put it behind me. I went to bed on the Sunday evening and started to think about the kisses again and thought had I forgotten when someone kissed me and I then started thinking had I had unprotected oral sex when someone had sucked my penis as I could not remember if I went to the toilet before I left the Bar.

I immediately said to myself stop worrying as it is anxiety and I know not to have unprotected sex. I am also aware that the guy who kissed me on the cheeks asked me about sex and I remember saying no.

I had a fair amount to drink that night but whilst in this gay bar I had no extra drink at all; I had been refused entry in one bar and when I was in the taxi home I may have drifted off and struggled when paying but I was definitely alone then.

When I masturbate sometimes (This is not a result of this night it happens anyway) sometimes my penis gets sore and if you put a tissue on it you may see small bits of blood, I had masturbated the day before this night out.

To be on the safe side one day short of twelve weeks I wnet for HIV1, HIV2, Ghonorreah, Clamiddea, SYphillis, Hep B (Already Inoculated for this anyway) and Hep C and everything was negative.

The clinic I went to was a private clinic where I just went and paid for tests and didn't discuss anything about what had happened and just I wanted peace of mind.

Last weekend my stools were white but I do suffer from piles and the Walk In Centre and I too believe that is a result of Anusal Capules I put up my bottom; it has not happened since; my water has been reasonable just occasionally different colours (That may just be my imagination).

Would you agree I should put this behind me and agree to Cognitive Behaviour Therapy and stop worrying about STD's or do I need to wait until 180 days and go for Hep C?

I think about this daily and the anxiety is building; I think about the fact I was nothing thinking about sex until almost two days after and even though I had alcohol in me I had said no when someone asked me. Is it anxiety or could I have forgotten something when I remember most parts of the rest of the night?

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benshat
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jeanjames profile image
jeanjames

I'm listening.....you are sounding very unhappy. I do suggest you get medical help and take control of your body! The love you are seeking surely must be within you. Y ou sound like a good person.....allow that goodness in......Speak to friends allow yourself to be vulnerable you will be amazed at how many people love you.

Sending you healing thoughts

Jean

xxx

benshat profile image
benshat in reply to jeanjames

Are you Kerry blue