Trust issues?: Hello everyone. I was just... - Heal My PTSD

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Trust issues?

purplevscoteen profile image
8 Replies

Hello everyone. I was just wondering if any of you have experience relearning to trust people after a traumatic event? I am ok with most people although no longer social in person as I use to be but I can't stand to be around other teens anymore. Everytime I am in environment with any teens outside of my dance group I feel like everybody in the room is giving me the evil eye, talking about me, laughing and that they are all thinking bad things about me and want to hurt me. This isn't unique to any place. I feel it at school, the public library, Walmart, and felt like it even when my family took a trip up to Idaho where I don't know anybody. My whole life I have been bullied for being autistic and in high school had some fake friends who spread rumors and made me the most unpopular kid in school. I ended up with nobody and didn't stick up for myself because I didn't know how to defend myself or respond when people would come up to me with these crazy accusations. I even had one friend who knew of my German heritage and went around school telling all the Jewish kids I was a nazi even though I am not by any means my great grandma is a holocaust survivor! The Jewish kids came beat me up and destroyed my clothes and phone without even bothering to ask questions or they would have found out I had a Jewish great grandmother. I really don't want to be scared of other teens anymore because I want to make some real friends for the first time in my life. Does anyone know how to learn to trust?

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purplevscoteen profile image
purplevscoteen
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8 Replies
Marnie22 profile image
Marnie22Volunteer

I wish I could help you. I only ever trusted one person from birth and have no idea how to learn to trust anyone else. Most articles etc. I have read involve learning to trust again after some kind of problem/betrayal. I never learned to trust anyone to start with. Because of this I haven't found a way to have friendships or relationships. I hope someone leaves some good tips on this thread, I am clueless as to how to learn this. Best wishes. 🌼

purplevscoteen profile image
purplevscoteen in reply to Marnie22

Thank you this is actually super helpful. I should have considered looking for articles. I hope that you soon meet some people who you can trust yourself soon.

Marnie22 profile image
Marnie22Volunteer in reply to purplevscoteen

Thank you.

designguy profile image
designguy

Hi Purple, I feel for you, I was bullied as a kid in school and had bad eyesight and wore thick glasses, I couldn't see to fight without my glasses on so I couldn't defend myself either.

What you're describing is social anxiety disorder as a result of the trauma from bullying. You more than likely need to process the grief, anger and shame from the bullying to heal and learn to trust yourself so you can begin to trust others.

My suggestion is to find a therapist who knows or specializes in treating social anxiety disorder and trauma and work with them. There are also some online social anxiety programs if you can't find a therapist.

My best to you.

purplevscoteen profile image
purplevscoteen in reply to designguy

Hi design. I also have really thick glasses I have to wear. I am so sorry you were bullied no kid deserves to have to go through those difficult experiences. I unfortunately don't have my own money for a therapist and my parents are not so understanding. I will certainly look into some of the online programs though. Thank you for your suggestion. ☺️

designguy profile image
designguy

You're very welcome, sorry to hear about your parents, mine were not understanding or helpful either. Sounds like i'm older than you, It took me years to figure out that I had c-ptsd and social anxiety disorder from the bullying. Once I realized what I was really dealing with it made it much easier to seek the right help and look for the right information to help me heal and recover. I suggest learning all you can about social anxiety which you can do online, it will be helpful and you will be more prepared when you are able to do therapy.

lolanell profile image
lolanell

It’s hard to trust people…when you have been hurt by others….especially when you do not know why..but people are basically good..and we are all looking for the same sense of belonging in this world..be patient with yourself

Agara33 profile image
Agara33

it would be very hard to be able to trust after such horrible experiences. we need people in our lives but they can be so incredibly heart breaking. And their beauty and cruelty can be equal...i hope you can find just one person in your life that is truly deserving of your trust and can shine love on you

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