Does anyone else find they get emotional far easie... - Headway

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Does anyone else find they get emotional far easier since BI?

keeley24 profile image
16 Replies

I think this may be common problem after BI but does anyone feel they get emotional more over stupid things that don’t really matter? I think I’ve always struggled to hide emotion both laughing and crying. Since my BI it has been the crying over silly things. Could be something sad I read or anything. Doesn’t happen often but there is something I want to talk to someone about on Thursday nothing at all sad or anything but I know I will be fighting back tears which as well as being embarrassing could mean getting the answer I want but through them feeling sorry for me which I don’t want.

Any tips on keeping the tears back?

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keeley24 profile image
keeley24
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16 Replies
2stroke profile image
2stroke

keeley24

Shedding tears is and should be a natural thing,to ease tension and smooth out blood pressure.i'm not so bad now ,after having my anti depression medication.

bereavement and 2 strokes aren't minimal problems i've had to cope with ,in the recent past.. 😭

paxo05 profile image
paxo05

Hi Keele.

Basically yes my emotions fly all over the place.

Try explaining to the person that you may get emotional and try and reassure them that for you this is now normal and not to read to much into this.

It is a long shot I know but if they care and are trying to be understanding then they should be fine with this.

Frustration can influence your emotions as well as the release of finally getting through to some one.

Try explaining this and maybe they may suprise you and understand.

Good luck.

Pax

RogerCMerriman profile image
RogerCMerriman

Yes, it’s to use some ones phase from here, ones inner toddler or at least for myself, oddly mostly I’m flat and emotionalless.

keeley24 profile image
keeley24

I wouldn’t be comfortable mentioning I may get emotional but if I do I could mention it. It is actually a man who set up a BI support group that I need to talk with so he is probably aware people can be overly emotional though he’s gone the opposite way and become less emotional.

What it is is this man offered to give me personal training end of last year which I accepted and enjoyed. It was supposed to continue this year, but he has decided to end it as he said other people are wanting PT and he can’t fit everyone in. Also as he also has BI he may not be comfortable having a group of us do PT at once as he feels responsible for everyone. It is clear he likes helping people it’s just he struggles to make time. I have 2 more sessions left before he finishes doing it so I’m planning to get him a thank you card and put few things on that I feel and that I’m hoping may make him change his mind. If it doesn’t work it doesn’t work he will still have helped me a lot. This week I hinted towards having an extra session and he seemed like he would consider it. I was very close to getting emotional at one point then but luckily he didn’t notice. I can hold it back more when the person doesn’t notice or mention it but as soon as they notice I can’t hold it back at all. Also after a short cry I’m normally fine but it’s hard to make yourself cry over something at a set time. Like I will go in to talk to him feeling like I can’t get emotional then something will set me off.

LindaHannah profile image
LindaHannah in reply to keeley24

Sometimes a BI can make people miss social cues, or become a bit aloof maybe in the same way some can become more emotional. It might be worth considering where his focus is at the time because this can affect his response to you.

I am pleased that you enjoyed the sessions you have had.

The thank you could be the form of some biscuits for elevenses as this is more casual but welcoming, and a casual. Do you have other options for similar PT sessions or are you able to carry on with perhaps the odd supported session. Good luck though and hope you can keep going with the fitness sessions you chose.

Yes BI's can increase emotional responses. Make sure you rest and look after yourself. Best wishes xxxx

paxo05 profile image
paxo05 in reply to keeley24

It sounds like he would understand your emotions if he has a bi himself.

Go for it. You must try and understand that he also has problems he is sorting through. He may feel uncomfortable in charge of a group.

He may be taking small steps in his recovery. Explain how you feel and the help he has given you. This may help him boost his own recovery.

As they say nothing ventured nothing gained.

Pax

sealiphone profile image
sealiphone

I feel there are at least two aspects to this, firstly a TBI is a traumatic life experience and that can cause emotional fragility. Along with that your injury may have effected areas involving

emotional response.

It's common for those with a brain injury to be deeply affected by TV and films, which have any kind of tearjerker content. You may see this as a positive effect, as empathy is what makes us human but it can be impossible to have that view when you're emotionally fragile.

I've done a lot of work with people post TBI and I can vividly remember someone, at a public meeting, saying it felt like their skin had been flayed away and all their nerve endings exposed.

Writing down your inner feelings and asking the person to read it can have the added benefit in that they gain a better insight to your difficulties and you don't break down in tears telling your story

Davebe profile image
Davebe

I know it. Before, I hadn't got a heart, but a 'swinging brick'. Now I could cry over Lassie come home. I think that makes things worse having been a soldier and a fireman in the past . However, the saying about 'big boys do cry' does tend to have a different meaning. I take anti depressants but prefer a comedy film, something like Police academy or Home alone!!! As far as tears, I think it's not just the BI . Dave

fredikins profile image
fredikins

Your not alone in this Keeley, for me I find the suppression of inappropriate laughter the problem, this can be most embarrassing, until I explain its a side effect of BI, though sometimes the other person has fallen into laughter themselves, its possible to over think these things, as when the last visit from my local brain injury support team member came to pass I was certain I would cry and had even apologised in advance........ but no tears, It may be the case that the expression of emotion is necessary in making 'normal' people realise the reality of your BI, making the invisible visible as it where. Good luck with whatever the talk is about on Thursday, as with a lot of posts here I would like to know how it goes, curiosity mixed with hope for you I think is what that is about.

keeley24 profile image
keeley24 in reply to fredikins

I was always terrible at not laughing at certain times before BI so probably would still be same now. One of worst times being at school we shouldn’t of had mobiles in school. (This was when they first got popular) was in lesson with teacher who normally always took mobiles off you. My phone rang in lesson it was in my bag so I couldn’t stop it ringing without being noticed. Well a few lads pointed out it was my phone. I said it wasn’t. I was took out of class and asked again and told to turn it off. Back in class it all kicked off the lad who pointed out it was my phone was (rightly) annoyed I hadn’t had my phone took off me. The teacher went mad at how he dared to tell her what she should be doing and even went as far to stick up for me for lying about it being my phone as it was probably cos I knew the fuss it would cause. Well I sat there listening with my hand to my mouth trying my best to sit still and not make it obvious how much I was enjoying it. As we went out at end of lesson I’d just about managed to stop laughing and the teacher who was still annoyed told me not to ever think of taking my phone in her lesson again after I’d seen the disturbance it caused. I was still very amused so just nodded and went out. I did always have phone on silent in that lesson afterwards tho if I could have been sure of a repeat of that if it happened again I would have gladly let it happen again.

Will let everyone know how the talk goes Thursday planning what I’m going to say and will put notes on my phone so I remember.

Silmarillion profile image
Silmarillion

Yes indeed....I get more upset at organisations such as the DWP etcthey make me cry a lot. I cry because things are cute.....crazy! I cry at films all the time. I dropped a box of stuff all over the floor at work and started crying. For a while there I had a hideous boss where I work part time and she made me cry on a daily basis with her snide comments....

keeley24 profile image
keeley24

Well got few other things to mention Thursday as well as the PT not felt emotional talking about it to other people so hoping I will be ok. Also got him a thank you card which I’m going to put a few things in hoping he will change his mind about not doing any more PT.

keeley24 profile image
keeley24

Spoke too soon lol. I made a video last night about having personal training with text and videos just how much it’s helped me and thanking him for helping. In past he has been terrible at replying to messages. I’ve mentioned it when I saw him and he pretty much said cos of his BI if he’s busy when he reads message he forgets and it’s something people have to put up with. It did get to stage where I didn’t say anything else to avoid argument. So it was either get reply as soon as he read a message or you wouldn’t get one. He saw video I sent him last night tho it was late by time it finally sent and he replied just now. Actually got bit emotional that he replied stupid I know. Well he will be fully aware of how I feel and how keen I am to continue PT so will see what happens. Could be that him continuing is best option as the charity he runs does pay for stuff to help people but obviously would make sense for him to do PT rather than paying someone.

keeley24 profile image
keeley24

This is really going to be where my memory is tested. There is a lot of things I want to say to him and ask him, but I want it to be more like conversation that question and answer session. My memory isn’t too bad with one or two things but add more and I’ll end up forgetting some. I am putting everything in my phone so can check that if needed but would rather not need to.

Fificakes2 profile image
Fificakes2

Yes I'm a bit laugh cry too. But it ets confused cos I was really stressed and anxious after supermarket, but I kept giggling.

Emotions are all lot more confusing after brain injury.

keeley24 profile image
keeley24

Well had the talk or at least some of it. Didn’t exactly go as I hoped but didn’t get emotional thankfully. Not all bad though. Woman who works with the man is going to have a word with someone they know who is a personal trainer near where I live to give me personal training to keep me motivated also he has a gym so could meet other people. Also the man who been doing personal training said he will go for runs with me when he has time and already said after last session next week he will see me again end of next month so at least next week won’t be too bad.

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