Dating?

[spideyman]

Is there any site which caters for people who have had a head injury and dating?

All the so called disability sites aren't actually focused on hidden disabilities but instead just on disabilities of ppl using wheelchairs.

This annoys me and surely there's a site for hidden disabilities

[Kittycat0701]

Hey spideyman I have been online dating for a while with no luck but sadly I have never found a site for people with hidden disabilities. I have one myself and it's really hard trying to explain it all its so complicated for me that I just seem to put people off. If you do find a site let me know too

Ali xx

[razyheath43 in reply to Kittycat0701]

why not start youre own?

[Matt2584]

Hi Spidey,

A friend of mine I know through Headway found her husband to be through a website/company called 'Stars in the sky', I'm sure that was the name.

She has mentioned it to me a few times but I am not too bothered using the site myself.

I do not have a girlfriend, I am single but I am pretty happy with my life right now.

Don't think I really want a female to come in and mess it up :).

Take care,

MJ

[RogerCMerriman in reply to Matt2584]

fairly sure stars in the sky, where the firm that where being filmed for the undateable tv programs.

[RogerCMerriman]

I supose the question is do you want your patner to be disabled as well?

lot of it is meeting someone, be that online or face to face.

how big is your social group? i meet lots of folks at work, but not many out of work, though I am married and so on.

[moo196]

Good question - haven't even looked for one but am on a national dating website where my profile clearly states what I have been through and some limitations .... I think I prefer (myself) to be in the mainstream world with everyone else .....

As Razy said - you could always see if there is interest enough to start one ?

[Stardrop]

My Headway goes bowling every now and then, relatives/friends and 'us' can talk etc. socially. You know everyone has either got or knows about head injury. It's informal and the people are friendly. Some of the younger ones are single and some people are on Facebook. Have you got anywhere like that? Make friends first, then if you have an interest?

[angelite]

Sometimes, you find people with a different type of disability understand and 'get' you very well. I recently met some great people in hospital, some with purely physical probs, totally neuro unrelated, some with cog and phys. on the neurology ward where I was eventually moved to . Chair user, single amputee, non neuro said the nicest thing to me :

I appologised for the shaky, stuttering, jerky, word searching state of myself while talking to him and he simply calmly said 'You are ill'. Totally accepted. We were good mates for the rest of my stay. Top bloke, even carried my bags down on his knee when I was discharged as I was too weak and wobbly to manage them plus use the stick , so I could wait for my partner in the foyer : )

I think adversity, in any form of challenge, often brings people together and creates acceptance and empathy for the plight of others.

I am comfortable with all kinds of disabilities these days, I think my personal experience has given me an insight and realisation that disability is not some scary, mysterious taboo and it is good to get to know the person behind the problem : ) x

[Matt2584 in reply to angelite]

I agree. Shove aside the problem, get to know the person. I can sometimes still struggle with that, I think most of us can.

It could be like finding a diamond in the rough or a needle in a haystack. It could be a case of beauty and the beast or even more so beauty IN the beast :).

They say "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" and some people at first glance could see a person they think is drop dead gorgeous. Then you get to know the person and they are butt ugly.

Then there are some people who you might see as reasonably attractive, or OK looking but not your type but and is just a friend at the end of the day.

It's these types of people that turn out to be the real beauties :).

Like I said "A diamond in the rough" :).

Now...

Where is my diamond?

[angelite in reply to Matt2584]

Hiya Matt,

It's funny you mentioned diamonds. When Eddie was in hospital with his stroke, there was a man opposite on general ward that had recently had an abdominal op for cancer. He was very weak and had no waterworks control. Ed would go over to help him sit up and get him things as he didn't like to bother the busy nurses. I would help him out too when I visited and help translate Ed's speech ! He was moved to another ward. We went to say goodbye when Ed was discharged. I remember him saying to me that Ed was a rough diamond : )

Lovely man, used to go hillwalking like me before he got ill.

Keep looking for that twinkle, Matt ! : )

Angela x

[BaronC]

Well, as documented on here I met the Baroness (after many, many awful dates) on a very well known free dating website. To be honest, I was frank and honest on my profile, explained all prior to meeting and she simply said,

'Yeah, and?'

None of it was an issue, simple as that really. She's not one of 'us', she's in rude health and had no knowledge of brain injury prior to meeting me. It didn't matter, she didn't care and the rest is history. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be.

Good luck

Andy

[headchild]

My daughter has the same problem spideyman.

She has used various dating sites but unfortunately for many of those with disabilities it can be just a pipe dream to go out on a date as support may be needed, and of course there is the travel problem - so ideally someone more local would be the best option.

This all goes for making life on the dating scenes difficult at times.

Of course there are those who are just 'messing about, having a laugh' with no genuine intentions of meeting anyone from the site which can be very hurtful to those who are genuine.

I do hope your quest for a partner bares fruit and that you find your life long partner soon