TBI after Moto Cross accident.

[MXman]

Hi all, new here and looking forward to some help. Had a pretty horrendous MX accident 11 weeks ago and I'm healing well and went back to work pretty quickly but it's taken w long time for me to feel better. Fell off as my handlebars caught a hay bail on a fast stretch of the track and was unconscious for 4.8 minutes and went to hospital. Ct scans showed small bleeds to the frontal lobe of the brain and they have now cleared up but I can't remember how he accident happened which is worrying to me but was told what happened. Good rider and rode this track a lot but these accidents do happen. I get very tired around 4pm and wondered if this was a symptom of brain injury and if it would stop. In general I feel ok but get third when I'm working, have own building company with a great team but I'm on the tools too and I'm a carpenter and get very tired when working not phisicaly but mentally. Hope I get some messages back. Thanks. N

[Kirk5w7]

Hi MXman, what you describe is pretty common, if you look at people's profiles on here a lot of us are years down the line and still experiencing various symptoms. You are very lucky to be back at work so quickly too.

But everyone's brain injury and recovery are unique to them, the watchwords are patience and acceptance, by that I mean your journey to be as you were may be long and you may never recover to be exactly as you were, it depends where in your brain and how badly it was damaged by the bleeds.

The acceptance is if you need to make allowances for yourself, do so and take whatever time you need, don't be hard on yourself, but repetition is crucial to relay any pathways lost in your brain.

I am 3 years on and the damage done in my brain, plus my age, means I will not work again. There are areas in my brain where cells have died and these do not regrow, it is up to me to practice those tasks I find difficult so that pathways around the damaged areas are made.

So keep up the good work, rest when you need to, I. Sure your determination will see you through

Take care Janet xx

[EleanorS]

hello

i'm not very knowledgeable ( i was under assessed following the injury & could have done with info and rehab) but i'll reply. have you got the booklet brain fatigue? by headway and the booklet the effects of brain injury? following injury i thought i was incredibly tired, but its not just tiredness making you feel like that it is something called brain fatigue, pathological brain fatigue. it is incredibly early days for you, as time goes on you should find that the tiredness or brain fatigue improves a lot. my neurologist said at 2 years post brain injury that i was as normal as i was going to get but with all due respect to the man , i beg to differ and at 3 years post brain injury my brain fatigue or tiredness is still getting better. i think that it is an excellent sign that you are able to go back to work so soon and manage as much as you can. but please pace yourself and get genned up on brain fatigue. make your gp aware of how people with brain injuries get tired/get brain fatigue it is the most common after effect of brain injury. show him the headway booklet on brain fatigue if he is not aware. maybe you could get more time off? youve not even had 3 months off. it takes a long time to get over brain injury, talking months and months and months. maybe make your employer aware also of brain fatigue? sorry i cant come up with more to help. but by the way headway phone line are always good to call about specific issues.

[paxo05]

Hi

Well done in returning to work. As otherd have said mental fatigue is a big problem with a bi. It may not seem it but your brain is doing at least double the work it used to do just to function. Hopefully this will improve and recover.

If not it may be that you adapt your life to accomodate this. You may not feel there is a way of doing this now. Trust me when adapting is the only solution you will adapt.

Its not all doom and gloom. Its just learning to accept and adapt. It is amazing how your life may change and not always for the worse.

You may here the two year recovery rule mentioned ( by medical staff mainly). This is probably true medically but as you learnt to live this NEW life you go on improving.

Welcome to this forum and ask away and add any advice you can. We are all greatfull for any input.

All the best Pax.

[EleanorS]

i think its a good sign that youve been able to go back to work so soon and full time! in my humble opinion i reckon that this could quite possibly bode well for improving on tiredness/brain fatigue. there is no way i could have done an hour a day 3 months post b i.

[Hidden]

Welcome. You have found the best place to come and please ask any questions or just look in and keep us posted. We have all got varied experience of BI and we all know how much fun it can be........Yes, it is really early days and I hope you continue to improve, back at work already is amazing but I agree with everyone else, please go easy on yourself and rest when your body tells you to. All the best to you

[cat3]

There's not much I can add except to reinforce what Pax has said. 'Accept & Adapt' is the best advice after a brain injury ; there aren't really any short-cuts.

Get as much mental stimulus as you can for re-training purposes, whether that's with crosswords or tv quizzes ; exercise your mind for frequent short periods, but not to the point of exhaustion.

Also, as your injury is so recent I believe you'd be wise to keep alcohol to a minimum, or even abstain if possible. And if fatigue is a problem at 4pm, try to catch a nap somewhere, even if it's in your vehicle, for half an hour. Pushing on only leads to greater exhaustion and eventual burn-out.

Good luck with this MX. Being young and fit is a distinct advantage for anyone with a brain injury, so you have a head-start !

Cat x

[MXman]

Thank you all so much for your replies, they really have helped. I have my own construction company so its difficult to get time off but I went back to work after coming out of hospital which I was in for a week. I couldnt concentrate so gave it another week which helped but got really tired around 1:00. Its better now but still getting tired.

As Eleanor has said I will have a look at all the leaflets on brain fatigue and have a good read. Totally understand and agree with you Kirk patience and acceptance are the key words I have to understand and I'm learning to do both. To reply to you Cat I do have a nap around 4 and it really helps so it must show I need the rest but I'm no spring chicken at 46 but I'm pretty fit and love the outdoor life. I Don't drink any alcohol and as said I'm pretty fit but its funny how it can just knock you down. Its definitely had an effect on my general thinking as I tend to switch off if people are talking to me and I must show a lack of interest, hopefully this will come back. I will need to adapt in all sorts of life stuff. Again thank you for the replies and more chat to follow. N

Just wanted to add that because of the tiredness I can get quite short when I'm tired and tend to be a bit snappy with the family. How can I teach them this is part of the recovery process? and not me being aggressive and hurtful.

[Kirk5w7]

I have a book bought for me by my son called " brain injury rewiring for survivors" and they do one for " loved ones" too is a mine of information to help the healing process and also explains possible changes in behaviour and personality.

As I said before everyone is different but books like this are useful to help you understand any changes you may be experiencing and that it is a result of the brain injury and you are not being difficult.

Headway do lots of leaflets and are only too happy to speak with you should you wish it, their helpline number is on the website.

Take care Janet x

[malalatete]

Analogies may help with family and friends - there are some useful ones on the net about chronic illness (which you have - the aftermath of a BI will be lifelong - you will adapt, but a bit like a badly broken wrist is never quite the same again, nor will your brain be). Try searching for 'gorilla in the house' or 'gorilla on my bed' and also 'the spoon theory' - that last one particularly good to explain fatigue and why when you need to stop you really do need to stop.

Learning to pace yourself is the key thing. There are lots of charities which produce information on this - try the ME Association and the MS Society - both neurological conditions result in this kind of brain fatigue which affects your whole body.

Emotional weariness is common. Again the way to explain that to people is to compare it to how toddlers are. When you are tired, your brain can't process things very well. This leaves you unable to communicate in the same way as you usually could. So if things are upsetting when you are tired, a bit like a toddler who can't explain what it is that is wrong, you are liable to have a bit of a tantrum. It has to be taken with a pinch of salt - it's not necessarily indicative of how you are feeling, more that you are tired. My boys (9 and 11) now know that if I get snappy, the best way to approach it is to ask if I am tired, and to get me to sit down while they make me a cup of tea! They also know I will fly off the handle at next to nothing, and they deal with it these days quite well. I on the other hand, still find it hard - I used to be quite a placid person and I don't get where these red rages come from.

But as others have said - accept and adapt. Read and take in as much as you can. You have had a life changing experience - it was a bit more than a bump on your bonce, and you (and your loved ones) need time to take that in, and adjust your life view and plan accordingly.

Best wishes

[EleanorS]

i am going to go on a bit and you probably have explained this already but

when i was a kid spending time around people who were head injured i made allowances, and did have some understanding but didnt quite get it.

although it should have seemed obvious, i think if someone had just explained that there was Still an actual physical reason in the injured brain for irritability that might have gone somewhere.

it was just that if i saw a brain injured person going to work and functioning i thought that they must be all the way better when they might not have been. if someone had said J is still getting better, or might have to learn to adapt. and that lots of brain injured people are like this, not just J, i might have understood a bit better i think.

but also if the nature of the irritability/anger could have been explained eg,

the irritability is not in proportion to whatever situation is causing the irritability and the important thing is that the brain injured person knows that really with a bit of hindsight, theyre not really that angry and irritable its just the brain learning how to adapt and improve.

when i was brain injured it was like the anger /irritability was almost not a true expression/ not a true emotion, if your kids/family could be made to see that.

and also the anger/irritability is going to be totally forgotten about, completely dissolved far quicker than in a non brain injured person. (i found) but i dont know if others found this.

in short anger and possibly emotion and impulse control also are not always working quite right yet, but sometimes they are. there's a good chance its either going to get better or yourself people and things will adapt.

tbh this is such early days, it will get better.

i think that professionals might have devised simple bullet point written strategies for coping with irritability, (headway might have some information), that are better than what i can think of and you probably already know.

identify the triggers and do your best to work round them or avoid them

visualise yourself not losing it in a difficult situation

but if you think you are going to lose it , walk away and remove yourself from situation.

have a bolt hole. (i found that i needed lots of time away from groups of certain people especially in the early days)

with brain injury you can have reduced "information processing" and reduced concentration. that can improve a lot.

all brain injured people will know exactly waht you mean when you say you experience a shutting off and you do need respite when that happens. this will get better with time.

get the headway booklets, and show them to your family (and others if you want to).

good god that was a lot to read. take it easy.

[MXman]

All your replies really help, thank you. Its funny because I'm trying to carry on where I left off but I'm struggling to do that even with work which I truly enjoy. Riding was a therapy too and still is but I'm finding it hard to ride "where I left off" that will come in time I'm told but more importantly is every day life. As said about seeing red I don't get really angry and shout my head off I just get a bit snappy which is unlike me. Maybe I want it all to get back to how it was now and I'm being an impatient git...Im sure time will help.

I will get all the booklets and read as much as I can as this will help with insight knowledge. Thank you again for your replies, really has helped me today...N

[RogerCMerriman]

You may not feel it but your doing very well! I started back with phased return, starting at 3hrs it took me 6 months before I was up to full time.

21 months on i'm what GP's etc call high functioning but I still have only X amount of go, and I have to manage it.

like your self it's mental rather than physical energy, just come back from a 60 mile bike ride on lanes and bridleways, bit tired a cup of tea will solve that!

don't be surprised if you find a few other things as you improve, and you will it's very early days. have you contacted headway? going to the meetings has really helped.

[EleanorS]

headway booklets leaflets phonecalls , info on website are helpful.

good that youve found headway, sooner rather than a bit later like i did, (duh).

i logged on here recently 3 years after injury and saw that people experience the same things that i did and can see that there are some good people here.

i reckon thanks are polite but not necessary.

lots of things can give you brain fatigue , you'll already know, i can imagine that it would be a struggle, get as much advice and support as you can. could the citizens advice bureau advise you on benefits, if you could take some more time off..

[just to say i couldnt do as much as yourself at 3 months post b i.] i reckon youve got a good headstart, this is very good imho.

[cognitively if i tried to write a name eg Doreen , it would have 19 e's in it, reading , trying to write, communicating, very tiring now its improved a lot. physically, couldnt walk up slopes with crutches or help, now i can do a lot more.]

youre doing very well at such an early stage but plan and pace because your brain getting overloaded might be a bit of a challenge to a lesser or greater degree at 3 months post b i and for a bit longer yet.

[for me almost exactly 3 years post b i is an improvement on a year ago, 2 years post b i that was an improvement on 1 year post b i.

maybe at about 5-6 months post bi, i could cite an improvement there, in just being able to prepare for christmas. at 3 months didnt keep falling asleep all the time.] your recovery time might be speedier though.

take it easy.

[Danslatete]

Hi mxman.

I am 11 years post injury. I still struggle with fatigue, concentration and mood issues. When I'm tired I snap, when I'm very fatigued I can't even manage that. I just zone out.

I did a phased return to work a few years ago. I work about 25 hours a week which to me feels like full time. I work in a school which means I get regular breaks of holidays, I really need them. In the run up to Christmas I get completely overwhelmed. The start of the new school year is very difficult getting into a new routine and trying to remember names. By the end of the school year I'm more than ready for a break and my work does fall off.

You may find that you need a long weekend every few months. It's better to take a bit of down time to recharge than push through and not be productive.

I find it very difficult to concentrate on conversations when lots of people are chatting. Make sure important things are done in quiet times and take notes, read them back to make sure you wrote things down properly, and if you can, delegate till you feel more able.

If you can,try keeping a diary. You will be able to see what things you are struggling with and where you feel you are making progress. It's also useful for Drs appointments when they ask you how things are and have been!

I hope you are not intending to race again anytime soon! Rest and repair, adjust and the most tricky of all accept the limitations!

[MXman]

No don't intend to race again but practice I will. Rode last week and it was tough, as said thought I would start where I left off oh no... I do need to rest a bit more and take stock. I realised I wasn't right a few weeks back when I was trying to think through stuff at work and it was taking me longer plus it was really making me tired. As you have all suggested I need toluene what my limitations are and work toward them. Im a stubborn git and want to be the same as I was now and not wait, just proves I'm not right and will have to wait.

[MXman]

Just wanted to share with you all that I had a bit of a revelation today and its completely due to chatting on here. I have now realised completely that I am recovering from a brain injury (frontal lobe) and that thanks to chats here about adaptation and recovery I am in recovery. I remember my consultant saying that its natural and normal to feel like I did when it happened and that after a week I would think that I was ok and didn't have any problems. I realise that he was right and that I recognise now there still is a few problems in that I need to understand whats happened. I understand that I'm not the same as I was but will hopefully in time get there. My tiredness is due to the injury and my brain can't always cope with what I'm trying to do. As I'm a carpenter I use the frontal lobe a lot with coordination and thinking and processing, it can get painful. I also realise that on a lot of occasions I don't really show much emotion and don't really care about things and stuff that I should care about, again this will come back.

I was told today that a big step in recovery is recognising that you do have an injury and that you can go forward. I am at that stage and need to adapt and learn. N

[Hidden]

Yes, its a shock to the old system. You can go from being a strong, independent, wage earning, happy and carefree person to someone who looks almost the same but something has shifted slightly and it takes a while to appreciate that you can`t necessarily do all you could before. I can no longer handle stress or lots of noise, especially sudden noises and I get tired quicker. I also like repetitive tasks because I am not good at doing things impetuously and cant just pick up new tasks really fast. I have my notebook and write myself reminders. Its an injury but in your brain so no one can see it. Our brain is us, essentially,so it makes sense that if it is knocked or damaged, you will change, depending which bit of it is damaged. I had meningitis and have lost loads of memories but you adapt, you learn and I have re-invented myself, which i see as really lucky,although some would disagree. I wish you loads of luck and pop back here anytime, thats why we all come, because we all understand

[RachyBoo]

Welcome Mxman

You are definitely in the right place here, you'll get lots of advice from everyone

Mine would be, as it early days for, take everything slowly and get as much rest as you can

[EleanorS]

perhaps you could make people around you aware so they can perhaps give you a bit of help.. to be frank your family should , and i am sure they are doing this.

i cant imagine being in your position with you mentioning that you are a carpenter and that this can be challenging now, could you go back to your medics, preferably the neuro and mention/emphasise this again.

in the beginning i had some coordination visio spatial challenges that did in improve quite quickly eg after washing up,couldnt place dishes in a drainer.

i think that 3 months post brain injury is no time at all, to emphasise that.

i was struck by the fact that you could go back to work at all in just under 3 months.

i think you have to take things steady,

you might find that, or i hope that for yourself things will go a bit better or differently - but things that you might have to watch out for if you dont already know are,

being over loaded with stress , pressure, pressures of time, having too much to do, too much info to take in, communicating a lot eg family event, having too full a day. if i have a big day in any way, it is almost predictable that i will have some degree of brain fatigue on the following day. But saying that its my opinion that your recovery will go better (if that's the right word and also I was unusual in that I didn't have challenges accepting eg physical disability) than eg mine . You'll find ways round things.

people find that they can have challenges coping with stress , like it fatigues the brain as much as anything else.

i found wikipedia articles to be good on the illnesses i had and also it was good on explaining about the relevant parts of the brain. you have probably seen wikipedia for frontal lobe diagrams explanations etc.

i have a book Head Injury by trevor powell, i think it mentions accepting limitations, and it has about 20 pages referring to frontal lobe.

[someone wrote a book about the brain illness i had, but his expreience and resultant injuries were quite different to mine, i'm not sure if thats because the diabetic crisis was also affecting my brain at the same time. but hey ho , i'm not usual in my response to brain injury all round probably.]

this is just my opinion but in a relatively short space of time i reckon you might be able to cite improvements.

take it easy

[MXman]

Thank you again for your replies. Yes it really helps talking on here. Has helped me understand whats happening too. Im waiting for some Headway booklets to arrive so looking forward to going through them and I'm going to see Richard Greenwood hopefully next week to have a chat. N

[EleanorS]

No problem at all Well, I am still a bit of a novice at finding stuff out and explaining it. Just googled Richard greenwood, looks very good. Don't hold back on telling him what you experience at work and at home. Take care

[MXman]

Ok may need a bit of help here... Not a good day today. Didn't sleep very well last night but today very brain tired, not really phisicaly tired but head tired. Had 3 naps today and really needed them haven't felt to good today as head tired and not working well. Up early and went to work this morning but not very productive... Any one else experienced this after head injury?? N Must be pure brain fatigue??

[Gaia_rising]

I've tried not to jump in on you, because you remind me of me, and I HATED people telling me what I should, and shouldn't do. I was back at work seven weeks after surgery, would have been five weeks, but there was a school holiday. I'm a tenacious ratbag, and I won't be stopped, or told what to do.

The tiredness is the dreaded fatigue, which isn't tiredness at all, more our poor battered brains, screaming "Have a minute, will you, I'm not done yet!" I launched head-first back into work, and it did me GOOD, because I can't stand to sit, getting chair-shaped, I appreciate it's different for you, but I needed to be needed at work, before they farmed my job out to six other people, who would all get it wrong.

You need down-time, my dear, you need to be able to 'switch off', which I loathe, because it feels so damned unproductive, then I tie myself in knots doing stuff that I don't 'need' to do, just so that I'm doing 'something'. If you had broken a bone, you would expect to have it pinned, or casted, and out of action for a while, until it knitted- you might well have broken bones as well, I don't know. I had a magic number in my head, six weeks to functional, twelve to repaired. Brains aren't the same as bones, they do a bit more than just hold us upright.

I'm not helping, but please know that you're not on your own, I've lost over a stone in weight, due to the enforced inactivity, I've lost all of my muscle-tone, and I want to poke people in the eye when they say "It could have been worse.", because they're not living with it.

[MXman]

Ha ha love you reply and yes I hate being non productive... It's time to adapt and rest. N

[Gaia_rising in reply to MXman]

We can still do a lot more than some people might think we can, but we have to measure it out. It's new, my haemorrhage was at the end of February, so I'm still working out the kinks in the system, and there are a lot, but I'm working around them.

My biggest problem is that I won't be told what to do, but I'd rather fall on my face knowing I tried, than just sit in the chair, with other people saying "Don't get up, you might fall on your face."

I'm doing a lot of biting-my-tongue, and a lot of leaving-the-room, because I need a clear DBS (CRB in old money) for work, I'm also doing more sleeping than I used to, it's rare for me to still be up at 10pm, when I used to be awake past midnight, and still up before 6, to get ready for work.

We're all different, but the similarity of the damaged brain is that it needs time to repair, to work-around, and, occasionally, sometimes unrelated to exertion or any other obvious trigger, it just STOPS, like a wayward toddler in a supermarket aisle. Learn to read the signs of your fatigue approaching, and have an escape-plan, unfortunately, some of the signs that I'm going-into-one are easily confused with some of the signs of another rupture, so I've spent quite a few pointless hours paralysed with fear, thinking this-one-might-kill me. My brain's an idiot, but I'm getting used to the adaptations I have to make.

All the best.