See and treated differently

[Cauthery]

Hi,

Does anyone find themselves being seen and treated differently because of their injury? Treated differently from siblings, friends, family and so on?

I'm sick and tired of being seen as the vulnerable one who needs to be kept an eye on, can have sensitivity taken advantage of, as well as overprotected. I forever feel in competition with my sister because she can eat and do whatever she wants without being worried about.

For example, at the wedding of a very close family friend I was put at a table with my parents.

It makes me so upset. How does everyone else handle situations like this?

Thanks

[Negeen]

Aww i'm sorry Cauthery-I thought your parents lightened up on the strictness?

[hayabusa]

All the time.

I want to get some T-shirts made with a slogan on saying:

"Just because I have disabilities, don't assume that I am stupid?"

People do assume and treat you like an embecile or patronise you or think they can treat you badly.

The prejudicial way disabled people are treated is disgusting.

Medical professionals are the worst for this.

[artangel]

Hia Cauthery, i wish i had the answer for you, it's been 8 years since my accident and i guess i look on the funny side when this happens to me, yes, i am still seen as the vulnerable one, but now i give as good as i get, so to speak. If i am put some where "safe"

i move to some where i want to be... and talk to who i want to talk to. You can then go back to your "safe seat" when you are getting tired.

Once when i did this, the other person started shouting at me as if i was deaf, because they were shouting i started shouting back!!!! it took a while before the penny dropped and i

said in a normal voice i am not deaf.

Good Luck and Best Wishes

[Hidden in reply to artangel]

GOOD ON YA.BUT OF COURSE WE ARE ALL DEAF & STUPID. NOT

[sospan]

Hi,

We have a difficult balance to content with.

On the one hand we want to be independent and be treated the same as the "Non injured" and on the other hand we want people to understand our suffering even though it may not be apparent and when we start to struggle we want them to give us a bit more time and care because we are not as able as we used to be.

Whilst I don't know the exact circumstances around the seating plan in the wedding you described, maybe the hosts were being subtly sympathetic by recognising that the people and noise may be too much for you and having your parent around may give you a bit of support ?

We know where you are coming from and many of us suffer from either of the two extremes of care: smothering or ambivalence.

All the best on your journey

[Hidden]

ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE COIN YOU CAN BE COMPLETELY IGNORED. I CAN'T DECIDED ., WHICH IS WORSE, BEING SMOTHERED OR LEFT OUT IN THE COLD. I JUST WANT TO BE TREATED NORMALLY I'M NOT MADE OR GLASS & I STILL NEED THE SUPPORT 'NORMAL' PEOPLE NEED. THEY SHOULD LISTEN WHEN I SPEAK

[Cauthery]

Thanks everyone. I think i'm gradually teaching everyone not to treat me differently and let me be me! The other day I slept all alone in the house, something no one thought I could ever do.

Good luck everyone with your journey.