My dearest Mom

Dear Friends

It is with great sadness and heartbreak that I write to inform you that on Friday, September 22, my beautiful mom passed away.

At the onset of her unmistakable symptoms, my Mom started on her journey with unbelievable bravery and courage. We sought the advice of multiple teams of doctors, world-renowned as the very best in their specialty… and through multiple surgeries, both invasive and non-invasive, infusions of many kinds, and finally a clinical trial to defeat this horrible disease, my Mom’s will to live was still strong. As the treatments began to compromise her quality of life, she pressed on. Despite hope, prayers and bargaining with God, this horrible disease was relentless, and took my Mom, while in my arms.

I would like to share with you that it was my honor to be with her every day in her passing. The peace that she and I found in each other was much like our relationship when I was a little girl. Her love for me and the peace we made is the best thing that I could have asked for. I am so grateful for the final months that she and I could share, and was honored that she requested my closeness and presence every day, up to, and including her final moments. While I am suffering such an unthinkable loss in losing my Mom, I realize this is also a tremendous loss for many of you.

In this unbelievably sad time, I find some peace knowing that she is reunited with her heroes, and some of her most favorite spirits are now with her in boundless energy – without any pain or suffering. I know she was greeted by Giacomo and Aunt Posie. I realize that her beloved Ayla is with her, along with Ria, Klowie and Sebastian. She is soaring with wings, and is now an angel watching over all of us.

Thank you to this wonderful community for such great support.

I am not sure how I will continue on, my I know I must.

Someone once told me this was harder for me, as her daughter and caretaker, than it was for her. She was my hero and my everything. She is in everything I do and everywhere I look. Time is so precious. Love and prayers to all of you.

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24 Replies

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  • VanessaEmpire, I am so sorry for the loss of your mother. As I sit here and write to you I am crying after reading your post. It was a beautiful ode to your mother. Life will go on for you, and you will always have those moments with your mom to think of, and you will think of her everyday. I pray that her death will get easier for you everyday. Take care.

  • I am so sorry for your loss, but what a blessing of or her that she died in your arms. She was truly blessed to have you with her through this difficult journey. Know that you were her hero as she was yours. May you find comfort in this most difficult and painful time. She will always be with you.

    Jean

  • I am so so sorry for the loss of your mom. She truly is watching over you and is suffering no more. God Bless you ✝️🕊

  • I am so very sorry for your loss. I too was with my om everyday until the end when she passed from liver problems.

    It's so true that the closeness toward the end sorta switch who we are as far as mom and daughter. I can remember my mom actually calling me mama a couple of times. I would lay in the bed with her and just talk or be silent. Those will always be some of my saddest and yet most memorable times with her.

    I wish you peace. I know it will take quite a while for the pain to ease but I know it will get better with time.

    Thank you so much for sharing such intimate details with us.

    Debby Cheshire

  • Prayers and Condolences to your family so sorry for your loss...

  • I am so very sorry for your loss. You have some wonderful memories with your mom, and I hope you cherish them forever. Your faith is strong, and will help carry you through this most raw of times. I promise you that it will get easier as time goes by. The pain will never go away, but you will find a last new normal. When my granny, who 1/2 raised me passed in my arms, I thought I couldn't go on any more. What I found is that we do go on, and as the days pass the pain lessens and the good times and memories start to take over. There are so many times you will feel like your mom is sitting on your shoulder - talk to her and listen and look for signs of her in your life.

    May God watch over you and help you heal

    Lauri-Anne

  • So Sorry for your loss, thoughts and prayers are with you x

  • You were such a treasure for your mom. She died knowing she was loved and not everyone can make that claim. May you find comfort in the presence of your family and peace in memories of better days.

  • I am sorry for your loss. I am an only child and lost my mom this February. She was a cancer survivor, but succomed to afib and a horrific stroke. She was one of my caregivers while I was in Treatment and taught me how to be strong from watching her cancer journey in 2007. Like you I spent my mom's last days with her. I did all the talking because she couldn't, but she could squeeze my hand. She had lived with us the last five years and during my days of difficult side effects, she comforted and encouraged me. I am glad I was there to comfort her the last two weeks of her life. We never know exactly how another feels as they go through the grief process, but I can certainly empathize with you by how I am feeling. God bless you and yours.

  • I am so sorry to hear of your mom's passing, Your messagge is heartfelt aand so true, She was lucky to have you as her friend, May her memory always bring warmth to your heart!

  • I am so sorry for your loss. Cry when you need to, but also remember all of the wonderful times you had with your mom.

  • I send my deepest sympathy for your loss. May God give you strength and peace.

  • My tears and sadness for your loss join the others. May you find comfort in your memories and the knowledge that life goes on for both of you, just in different forms.

  • Deepest condolences on your losing your Mom! I pray God gives you comfort in the days ahead!

  • I am sorry for your loss, sadly I lost my dad on September 23.

  • Cdidion- you were an great comfort to me - knowing that you were going through a similar journey at the same time.

    I am so sorry for your loss- sending you love and prayers- so far it is in the morning that is the hardest- Everyone says it will get easier- I guess we just have to take their word for it-

    Sending you light and love as you experience your loss, as I go through it too.

  • I felt comfort with you too knowing how you must feel. I'm glad I read your story and at the same time so sorry for your loss.

    Sending some hugs and prayers your way.

  • So sorry for the loss of your daddy. Peace be with you and your family.

  • Vanessa, I am heartbroken for you. You have so beautifully captured those moments with your mother and the shock and sadness that accompanies saying "goodbye for now". It is obvious that your mother loved you deeply and fought her most courageous fight to stay here with you longer; bless her brave and generous heart. Although your time together was too short (does it ever feel long enough when we love someone?) you both clearly filled that time with deep love and respect for one another; that rich life you created together is a real treasure. I know that the harsh shock of having someone suddenly gone from this physical world of ours is soul numbing. Please continue to hang on to your memories, celebrate the life and love you created together, and be very patient with yourself as you move through this sad time. The sharp edges do soften a little, and you will move forward forever thinking of your mom and what a gift she was in your life. Love is everything. Please take care.

  • My heart goes out to you and your Mom -- may she now be at peace and forever out of pain and sickness!

    Heartfelt sympathy,

    ~ Lisa

  • I too, was crying as I read your post. I too list my Mom to the same cancer I am plagued with. I was with her at home when she passed. I had quit work to care for her and don't regret that decision. It gave us a lot of time together. I know this is a hard time and words do little to comfort you. I will remember you in my prayers!

  • VanessaEmpire, so very sorry for your loss of your courageous Mom. I too lost my Mom 3 years ago, from COPD. I was lucky in the fact that she lived in an apartment we did for her in our home. Her last days were not easy for her, but she still managed too comfort me, knowing how heart wrenching it was for both of us. You were there for your Mom, always take solace in this fact. There will be so many things that will make you think of her, take joy in these things. God Bless. Donna

  • So sorry for your loss

  • sorry for the belated reply Vanessa, sorry about your mom, but she lives on in you, you are a piece of her, you can also keep her in heart., she'll never be far. God Bless...

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