Just want to give up

[Michie74]

Having this FND is draining me all the time my body and mind is getting effected always hard to find a positive outlook I'm always tired whilst trying to work 😕 it's also embarrassing when it happen s when I go out people staring at you I just want to give in to the darkness

[artmom]

Michie74, many people here will understand. I think today’s need to always find a positive outlook is unrealistic and can be unhelpful. It can make one feel even worse because one isn’t ‘fighting’ or looking for the positive or accepting and at peace with whatever the situation. Far more realistic to sometimes feel down, to struggle, to feel hopeless. I guess an issue can occur if that outlook is relentless. But for me, if I am able, I allow myself to feel less-than, and think ‘this is how I feeling right now and it shall not last’.

Please know you are here amongst people who have similar issues, who can understand or if not, can listen.

[artmom]

I believe research is backing up this idea now too (positivity not always best). Something else I heard recently - simply sitting with ones chin up, ones chest up and out, can create more optimistic feelings. This also apparently recent research. So that annoying platitude ‘chin up’ is now scientifically proven to help! If you think about how we behave physically when either up or down I guess this does make sense.

This is not a suggestion to make you feel better. But if there’s a point when this makes sense to you, hopefully it’ll be a small piece of the jigsaw.

[artmom]

I’m meant to be home schooling at the moment. Exhausted and in pain a lot and I am failing miserably. Today is not a good day. If I can listen to myself and accept that is how it is today, maybe, hopefully, tomorrow will be different? That would be good. But in this current situation...

I’m finding thinking how much others are doing in this crisis is actually helping me. I am so grateful. How I wish I could be a person to do more/it all? Yes I do wish that. But I am not that person right now. I just have to practice gratitude to all those who are. And I feel like I actually have it easy in comparison to so many. So if you are someone who currently has it less easy (sounds like that is you), remember it can be hard. Don’t push yourself to be all gung ho. I hope I’m not dishing out platitudes. There’s nothing more annoying than that! Feel free to tell me to get lost...I just don’t want to leave you so down.

[Brokendeer]

Hi yes, you are really not alone in this depressive cycle of FND.

I've had Motor FND for 12 years, so you can imagine how much social stress, embarrassing public encounters and various frustrations I have come across in the Medical Profession in that time! But I am still here, still carrying on - because I have too!

Believe me, I am not a naturally positive person nor do I bother being cheerful simply for myself. However, I do tend to put on a `brave face' when speaking with Family and Friends, else I feel they would soon give up contacting me? As the old saying goes "Misery loves company".

It does get easier to handle the physical and mental effects of FND daily as time goes by, you just adapt your life more around the symptoms. Remember too much mental activity is just as bad as too much physical activity - they equally drain you of energy, but depression is the worst for prolonging that fatigue I have found.

I was advised to go onto Anti-Depressants during my FND Therapies to help regulate my Brain (as a whole) not specifically for Depression itself. I did try them for about a year, and it did help me feel less anxious in public etc. I came off them again because of certain side effects, and no movement improvement, but even now I feel that was an important step for me, to know that I had tried everything out there?

Think about what you would need to change, alter, adapt or try in your life to break this terrible negative period you are in, could FND Therapies (arranged through your GP) help or maybe some Mindfulness stuff help find a better balance, even a way forward?

Be kind to yourself, search for the calm in the storm!

[Brokendeer]

Plus... I got told it was very important to keep well hydrated, as muscles/joints/spine/brain all use quite a bit?

And lately, as I cannot get Paracetamol (my only suitable painkiller) I have been trying `Tart Cherry Juice' 100% juice (100ml juice to 100ml water in a glass for me for 2 days) after I have done too much, to aid recovery.

It is supposed to revitalize the muscles etc all across the body, unlike most painkillers which are designed to combat a single pain zone. Must admit, whether it is the health claims or not, my body does feel a little more refreshed for drinking it?

Note: Beware of Beetroot Juice though, it claims to boost the Liver- thus boost energy levels. The British Paralympians used it in 2012 as a trial, but it can only be done for a week at a low dose and has very emotional side effects apparently!

Be kind to yourself, search for the calm in the storm!

[tabey]

Dear Michie74

Im so so sorry you feel this way and its so easy for some one to say oh i been there but trust me on this i think any one who has this condition defo has been to the dark place after years of this FND i think i have a hoilday home in the darkness as trust me im there alot.

But even thoe its hard and we have lost alot we have to battle on i can only walk a short distance and look like zombie and have often fallen at sainsburys but i really do not care any more on what people think they stare i smile they can judge me they wish will it change any thing no are they worth your time and energy no they are not

Dont be too hard on yourself sometimes we have to let this win regain our strenth and work with what we have

We all are amazing and we can beat this

Tabe

[Michie74]

Thanks for the support x

[jhop]

For those experiencing chronic pain I suggest the “curable” app

I just started it recommendation from pain psychologist and it seems shockingly that the practices are actually helping my pain!

[Brokendeer]

Hi thought you might be lifted a little by this I read in an article this morning?

Although it was about Brain Fog affecting people during the Covid-19 crisis because anxiety levels were all up. I still liked this truism from Paulette Sherman PsyD, she is apparently the author of a wellbeing book called`The Book of Sacred Baths'.

Quote: `Making choices and reinventing the wheel each day takes focus and energy.'

Be kind to yourself, search for the calm in the storm!

[Keeponfighting]

Hi Michie please don’t give up

I was once in your place but I’ve been healed from FND. Please read my testimony. While there is life there is light. God bless you.