Feeling so Rubbish

I have been 'lurking' here for a while now - reading blogs but never posting but i just feel so rubbish at the moment I dont know what to do.

I am wracked with fibro pain in my back and legs and feel so fed up that my walking is very limited. On top of that Three weeks ago my left leg started to swell and became really painful and i was diagnosed with a deep vein thrombosis and put on Warfarin for 6 months however although the hospital has tried desperately to get my blood levels right it swings from really high to really low for no known reason. And on Monday after having spent an amazing weekend with some really close friends I was hit by a massive depression largely due to the fact that my friends accept me for who i am but my I rarely see my own family as they dont accept my illness - i have had two days off work mainly sleeping/crying but have come back into the office today because i have been immensely pressured by my boss who also doesnt understand (he actually made me come into the office the day i was diagnosed with my life threatening thrombosis) but i just cant afford to stay off any longer although all I want to do is curl up and sleep. Finally I divorced my ex-husband 3 years ago but he has remained in the marital home since then although he recently sold it and the sale is due to complete on Friday but I have found out that there is not enough for him to pay my financial settlement as he has 70k of business debts secured against the house for a business which is no longer trading but he somehow managed to transfer them to a new business which he started after i divorced him and his only suggestion is that he pays me a weekly pittance until 2018 (given that he is 64 now he may not even be around that long). Sorry to ramble on just had to get this off my chest! I just dont know which way to turn right now.

Tracy

4 Replies

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  • Hi Tracy,

    Welcome to this site. Rest assured you are amongst friends. Whatever you are going through we all understand as we have our own experiences of pain, being treated unfairly, awful bosses ( I was bullied at work) financial problems of one sort or another....so you can let off steam on here without worrying about what we will think.

    I am so very sorry to hear that you are having such an awful time right now.....more than anyone should have to go through all at once. Health problems are bad enough without all the additional worry of a divorce settlement. I can understand how depressed you feel as i suffer with depression, too, and it is not surprising with all that you are going through with no family support.

    Thank God you have some decent friends who care about you.

    Have you thought about going to CAB for some advice about your financial situation? They are free and impartial. They might be able to help you. I haven't ever used them myself.

    Have you been back to your GP re the depression and pain?

    I can't think of anything else at the moment but I am here for you if you want to "chat". You can send a private message to me on this site if you want to. I am sure other people will send you a welcome message and offer their support too.

    Take care, Tracy,

    Love and hugs Saskia XX

  • Hello Tracy,

    Following on from Saskia's comment she has mentioned some good advice and going to the CAB & the GP which is something you should consider.The GP will be able to prescribe medication for your low mood and address your pain experience either by changing/adding medications or possibly a pain clinic referral maybe.

    It must be really difficult to return to work when you are not ready, it sounds like you feel your boss doesn't understand and isn't listening to you. On the FibroAction website there is information on work & Fibro. Please see link;

    fibroaction.org/pages/work-...

    Here you can read about your rights, reasonable adjustments & information about organisations who you may wish to call for further advice.

    I hope this is of help to you

    If you think your boss would benefit from information on Fibro, the website also has downloadable factsheets that you can print & take into work with you. Link Below;

    fibroaction.org/Pages/About...

    All the best

    Emma

  • Hi Tracy

    i am not surprised you are feeling so ill with so much going on, even if we don't have answers we do understand

    i have sent you a private message

    take care , hugs

  • Hi Tracy,

    Everyone so far has given you some great advice. This site is so good for us all to be able to rant and moan as much as we need to, and whenever we need to. We can feel like we are never putting on anyone, or burdening anyone because we all get so much support from reading each others posts. And if we don't feel up to it, we don't read them! So do continue to use this site for all the support you need. Take care.

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