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Dixiesdaughter profile image
12 Replies

So I got some bad but not unexpected news over the weekend; sadly I just lost another cousin to alcoholism. Not even 50yrs old she looked 20 yrs older, weighted under 6 stone and wore clothes meant for children aged 11-12yrs. She would goes days without eating and was in constant physical and emotion pain which literally left her unable to function. She was one of 4 siblings and all are alcoholics her brother died a very painfull death last yr when his liver packed in.

Unfortunetly for the two remaining siblings the same fate awaits them and although we as a family have staged several interventions over the years it appears we are fighting a loosing battle.

I am aware that people have different opions in relation to addictions and addicts but I can assure you that my cousins got/get no pleasure from drinking alcohol it has ruined their lives, taken its toil on their appearance, destroyed their childrens lives and brought a horribly painful death to two of them.

Please can you remember margaret in your prayers today and also pray that the remaining two siblings anne and john get to grips with their demons before alcohol claims their lives too

With thanx

Dixies daughter

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Dixiesdaughter profile image
Dixiesdaughter
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12 Replies

Hello Dixie, I am so sorry to hear about your cousin, what a tragic story and also concerning your other concerns too.

Alcoholism is an illness and cannot be helped when it reaches a certain point and my heart goes out to people with this illness. An addiction to this extent can be a vicious circle and specialist help and support is needed. I feel desperately sorry for people with any addiction, they need help not chastising don't they. An alcoholic isn't an alcoholic by choice I am sure, it happened for a reason they might not even be aware of, it sounds like your cousins have a predisposition to alcoholism with so many being affected by this awful addition/illness.

I will of course remember Margaret in my prayers today and my heart goes out to others in your family who are also ill. I hope they are getting the help, support and understanding that they all deserve.

My heart also goes out to you Dixie, it must be an upsetting and worrying time for you and the rest of your family.

I assume your family are getting support too - here is a link to Al-Anon, I would imagine you are aware of this already but it doesn't hurt to inform others too -

al-anonuk.org.uk/about

Here is their Helpline contact telephone number -

Helpline 020 7403 0888

Here is a link to info about Family Groups Meetings, this may be of interest to you and your family -

al-anonuk.org.uk/meetings/

Sending you a hug Dixie, please know that we are here for you at all times and we will always do all we can to help and support you along the way.

(((hug))) xxx

Libs

HI Dixiesdaughter, I sympathise greatly for your loss. My paternal grandfather, my Uncle and my father were and is alcoholics, sadly grandfather and uncle have passed away and the same fate is quickly approaching my father. It is as you say an awful addiction as all are. I also have a cousin who is a heroin addict. They all live in Shetland My birth place and i now live in Wales so i don't see them but i do hear and speak to my father. I hate what it does to a person but nobody seems to get through to them so all the family can do is sit and wait.

I hope your cousins geet the help and strength to quite soon.

Take care honey xxxx

in reply to

My heart goes out to you Rachie regarding your poor Dad. All you can do is to make sure your Dad knows you love him in spite of this awful illness he has. I am so sorry you are having to watch another family member succumb to something which should be recognised more as the dreadful illness it is.

Bless you and sending you a hug. (((hug))) xxx

Libs

Dixiesdaughter profile image
Dixiesdaughter

Hi girls thank you for your replies support and advice :-) your prayers & kindnwishes are received with graditude. Rachie I too wish your dad every success in his battle with the drink x

Cheers

Dixie x

Thank you :)

rushbrook86 profile image
rushbrook86

alcoholics have no protection it is as though they have a neon sign i can be abused my partner died of liver cancer caused by drink the finest description of a alcoholic is Dr Jeckle and Mr Hyde also there is no answer in the bottom of a glass also there is no future

Dixiesdaughter profile image
Dixiesdaughter

Rushbrook I'm so sorry to hear about your partner :-( alcoholism and addictions are so destructive. They ruin so many lives, tear apart so many families and cause so many deaths.

At times Its hard to be supportive when your standing on the sidelines watching someone you love destroy themselves and your patience and understanding can be tested to the limits as addicts can be very selfish and often their addictions has a very negative impact on the family as a whole but im sure you know all this as you will have lived it with your partner.

My son (22yrs) is also an addict and the stress his lifestyle brings affects my fibromyalgia immensely, often triggering flares, ive been told to cut him out of my life but how do you give up on people you love with all your heart :-(

Thank you for your reply it deff helps to share :-)

Dixie X

Really sorry to hear about your family illness dixiesdaughter. It really is am awful illness which affects everyone who comes into contact with it. The only illness that is made worse the more people care. Please try alanon as suggested. You don't have to cut your son out of your life to recover from the effects of his illness. They show you how to live alongside the illness. Its amazing being around others who understand x

stepper

Pm if you wish to x I'm pretty sure I have fibro because of genetics but the cfs it definately down to living alongside alcoholism x

irisjoy profile image
irisjoy

HI

I just wanted to say it is an awful addiction

My hubbys Brother in law is an alcoholic but has been a non drinker for a few years

However so much damage has been done to his liver,kidneys and brain among other things

but he STOPPED

It can be done so sometimes there is hope

sending you warm hugs xx J

Dixiesdaughter profile image
Dixiesdaughter

Hi stepper and irisjoy thank you for taking the time to post words of encouragement & support its deeply appreciated. The results of my cousins autospy have come through and she apparently died of a tumour on the heart, brought on no doubt, by alcoholism and neglect. Shes being buried on thursday. Im in bed at the moment with bad does of flu and a chest infection just started an antibiotic today so am hoping il be well enough to attend funeral and say my goodbyes. Keep your fingers crossed for me :-)

Dixie x

in reply to Dixiesdaughter

Sorry to hear you are poorly Dixie, make sure you keep warm, take your meds and keep your fluids up. Hopefully you will feel a bit better by Thursday and sufficiently well to attend the funeral.

It's no wonder you are struggling a bit at the moment. Take care Dixie, sending you love and hugs.

(((hug))) xxx

Libs

Dixiesdaughter profile image
Dixiesdaughter

Thanx Libby im taking an antibiotic and was hoping that it would kick in quickly enough to help me get to the funeral which is on thursday; at the minute it doesnt look likely :-( but im hoping a hot bath and a good sleep might help. Anway thanx again

Dixie x

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