hello from me

sorry I haven't been around a lot . my mum has been in hospital and then has needed a lot of looking after at home . 

I have been not so good with my health as I think I now have arthritis in both hands and my general pains have been hoffific. I keep thinking the pain can't get worse but it surprises me and does .

I have been struggling to keep myself going and finding life a real hassle just now have been to doctor who doesn't seem much help . 

anyway I wish everyone well and just wanted to say hi as I think it was over 2 months since I last been on ....

lots of love to all hugs and kisses too xxx

16 Replies

  • Hey aud01, Glad to hear from you as I have missed you.Sorry to hear about mom and your new pain.Please take care of your self my friend.Be blessed.Peck🌹

  • Hi my friend,

    I am so genuinely sorry to read about your mum, and I sincerely hope that she feels better soon.

    I am also genuinely sorry to read that you have not been too good as well. I sincerely hope that you can find some resolution to your hand pains. If your GP is not much help, it may be beneficial to go along to your nearest ''Walk-In Centre'' and ask for some help?

    I do not know if these two links are of any use to you, but they are for the NHS Choices symptoms of both Osteoarthritis and Rheumatoid Arthritis, in case you wanted to compare the symptoms:



    I want to genuinely and sincerely wish you all the best of luck and please take care of yourself.

    All my hopes and dreams for you

    Ken x 

  • So sorry about your Mum and of course the Stress of that makes your pain worse and then arthritis on top. I am sorry your doctor is not much help, they just don't know what to do with us cos they don't understand, my GP is lovely but leaves most of what to do with me to me if that makes sense and thats cos I understand more than he does. Sending you lots of soft hugs and hope things improve at least a little x

  • Good to hear from you.you have alot on your hands to cope with ...I sympathise with arthritic hands I have wrist & hand supports really takes the stress off joints .ask for a physio referral...

    Hope your mum is comfortable lucky she has you but who watches out for you.

    Gentle hugs for you 

    Hugs to all

  • Nice to hear from you again Aud. I can understand where you are coming from. Both my parents need constant help now, my dad (90) refusing to go to hospital and struggling on with my mum trying to help him, and she (88) is blind and stone deaf now with her own heart problems etc. 

    I'm lucky in that my sister takes mum shopping every week, and several family members, including myself, popping in without warning to see if their help is needed. The best thing I can do to help is cook for them. When I make something that can be put in the oven I make extra and stick it in the freezer for them. Simple instructions are put on the top in big writing so they know how to reheat it.

    I digress, apologies. Please, please remember that you do need to look after yourself too. Your mum wouldn't be happy knowing that she is causing you so much pain, and as well as you hide it she will still know! Hopefully you are over the worst now. Feel free to post a rant if you feel like it 🐸

  • Hi Aud, nice to see you back, sorry to hear about your mum, and your hands, can't be easy for you. I hope you can get help for your hands, and your mum gets better soon. Take care.xxxx

  • Hi aud01, sorry to hear you have had such a difficult time. I hope your mum is well on the road to recovery. The pain wears you down I know, your Dr seems as though he has no understanding of what you are going through. I am fortunate that I have great Dr now. If you have a surgery with more than one Dr, try to see if you can see them, sorry I can't be of more help, I send you gentle hugs.    Izzy xx

  • my doctor said she can't give me any kind of pain killer as I'm on tramadol gabapentin and paracetamol already for it . she said all she candid if it persists is send me to rheumatology sooner rather than waiting til September to my next appointment ... 

    I've tried to ask get for help re not managing to get a job I can do that would not make my health worse . but she isn't willing to give me a sick line . I failed my pip and ESA so it torture .... 

    I also wanted to ask is anyone talking dizzy spells ... such as they just sitting and you feel like you're spinning around then it goes .. it not an ear infection or labyrinthitis ...... as I'm not losing my balance ... but hey 

    mums been in hospital and we thought we were losing her but she fought in and is home however although my sister had a car for her and carers I am being asked to go in every day or second day apart from a Friday as she goes on a Friday only .... and I don't have the money for busses and some days I am just so tired I'm about sleeping in my feet or I am in so much pain I'm not able to move ...

    then to top it all I've just found out my sister has said my mum said I'm not welcome ... I found out cos she sent me a txt that was obviously for someone else .... 

    I'm just done with it all know that 

  • Vertigo can be a Gabapentin side effect, so worth mentioning the next time talking with a doctor.

  • Oh Aud, so very sorry to hear about all you are dealing with at the moment. I'm pleased that your Mum is at home now, but understand how much extra work that means. I heard something about a warm wax treatment for painful hands, not sure how easy that is to get/use?

    Wishing you better, it is good to hear from you again.

    Hugs MariLiz x

  • Sounds like youve a lot of negs happening at the same time, as happens some times, just to test us or something.  l guess your mum is seriously ill, and will be on strong meds, so will at times think and say things that are out of character, thats how health probs sometimes affect, and its those closest get it.  l think if you go 2 or 3 times a week when unwell yourself that is good, and your mum does have your sister and carers, so your doing your fair share as much as your own health allows and sure your mum will understand that in time.  Your dizzy spells sound a bit like vertigo, do your best thats all you can do and take it one day at a time, best wishes.

  • Nice to hear from you again but I wish it had been to tell us you were in less pain than you are.  I can imagine trying to keep going when you are in so much pain whilst looking after your Mom has been very difficult.  I do hope Mom is much better now and you can have a bit of a relax.  Probably the stress of her illness has not helped you as with stress we tense up our muscles and as we know that does not help fibro.

    I can commiserate with you with the arthritis in your hands as I have the same and it make so many tasks very difficult.  Do take car of yourself and come on the forum whenever you are able.x

  • Hi

    Just read your post.

    I'm very sorry to hear of all the troubles you've had and all the stress. Life unfortunately does not get any easier and it does effect our health when it gets stressful.

    I hope that things get better for you and that you can take time out for yourself and try to relax and hopefully get back to some sort of normality for you.

    Take care and best wishes.

  • I truly hope things settle down soon. 

  • Oh gosh Aud.  I cannot believe that you are having more troubles on top of everything you have already been through.

    I agree with the others that the dizzy spells could be vertigo.  It may also be a good idea to get your blood pressure checked.  As you are so stressed at the moment it could be that your blood pressure has gone up.

    As to what you do where your mum is concerned, may I suggest something?  It sounds as though you are saying you are not going to see her anymore (or am I reading that wrong?).  If you have decided you are no longer going to visit, if you could possibly manage it, I would go and see her one more time.  

    Hopefully, you could leave on a good note and would know that you have done more than any one who is in complete good health could have done.

    As has been said, when people get older and are not in good health they can be very unkind, snappy and irritable.  

    Please keep in touch, if you are able, to let us know how things are.

    I am sending you a big hug.  I've missed you.

    Be kind to yourself.

    Wishing you less pain and much more peace

    Lu xx

  • thanks for all the replies ... the situation with mum is she is usually good as gold with me when I visit . at the start she was a bit snippy and harsh and upsetting until I told her that I won't be back if she has me In tears again coZ after all I was only visiting to make sure she was well and I didn't need the stress of her on top of my health issue .. that changed her attitude and she had been great . 

    I want to keep visiting I really do because everytime someone say something to mum it me who gets shunned away and it so upsetting and this time I'm trying to overlook it . but I sat the other day  with lump in my throat and couldn't look at her because of what had been said . i know my sister only wants me there because it gives her an easier life but I want my mum to  want me there because she genuinely is happy I am back in her life and no other reason ... 

    I will get there . I always do . it just sometimes wears you down as yoh all know ... 

    anyway thank you for all your support ,..

    love to you all hugs and kisses too xxx

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