My daughter and I found this, thought I would share it with you good folks 
Murdered English
Pick up the paper and fall in the dustbin
Both of you stand together separately
Will you hang the calander or else I will hang myself
Why are you looking at the monkeys outside when I am inside
I have two daughters both are girls
Give me a blue pen of any colour
The principal is revolving in the corridor
All of you stand in a straight circle
Open the window - let the Air force come in
enjoy..Susan
love it all ridiculous xxgins
I love mashed up English. The one that has always stuck in my mind was a label on a new mop, it said "wet a lot before the use of" 
Hi tiredalot40
I hope that you and your daughters are all feeling really good today? Thank you so much for this, I really enjoyed it.
Take care
Ken x
Thank you ken, I am dealing with a sticky bit at present but who isn,t. Daughters are good, my eldest is expecting baby no. 2 in July and I am so excited They are taking me out for lunch today and having a family get together for mothers day tomorrow I am one very lucky mummy
Hope you and yours are as well as can be. Susan xx
Just noticed this, I didn't get my notification. Lunch out sounds wonderful. My kids have given me all their cards and pressies for their mum so I have hidden them until tomorrow!
I really hope that you enjoyed your lunch out? Have fun tomorrow, and remember that you are the most important person in the whole wide world to them.
Take care
Ken x
Awh thank you. Lunch was lovely. Looking forward to tomorrow, my little granddaughter will be up along with my girls, their partners and my parents. Should be a good day l think with girls their daddy is very important, but you're right tomorrow is my wee day. Take care, Susan xx
Youve made me so happy tonight
Giggles, We needs them.
Here is what I've made. 
