Disappointing appointment with consul... - Fertility, Miscar...

Fertility, Miscarriage & IVF Support

3,565 members1,342 posts

Disappointing appointment with consultants Assistant. 😣

11 Replies

Hi everyone.

I'm at my wit's end here.

So I didn't see my consultant and we didn't discuss what was planned.

Miscarriage test consists of NK cells- had that done.

Went over our history.

Told her about my heavy periods since my miscarriages- day 2 I used ,32 tampons and 8 pads and huge clots- apparently it is just settling down. I was forced to take a day off work unpaid.

Last night after intercourse I bled brown blood and this morning. Yes my smears are update and so I know it's nothing serious but it's still isn't normal.

I feel exasperated and my notion of endo returning was completely dismissed.

Any advice what to do next or do I accept heavy periods and bleeding after intercourse and bowel issues as well as endo as Normal part of daily life. 😥

11 Replies
Poppy16 profile image
Poppy16

That is pathetic. What a let down. So annoyed for you Jess. Not helpful at all. Could you contact your consultant's secretary and try to get an appointment with him as soon as is possible? How frustrating to get his assistant who clearly hasn't a clue. I honestly know how it feels to emerge no wiser after an appointment than you were going in. I am certainly no expert but it really seems that your endo may well be back. Maybe go back to GP too and ask about possibility of endo returning etc. This isn't normal nor should you have to put up with all this. Definitely go to GP and get advice plus try getting appointment with your consultant as he understands.xo

in reply to Poppy16

I was really looking forward to the appointment to seeing our consultant and discussing the way forward. If I complain about his assistant ill look so bad. I just didn't feel listened to or taken seriously. I will wait until I receive his letter- if the bleeding after sex isn't mentioned I'm going to play stupid and pretend I was too embarrassed to mention it and not cause any offence. I just feel annoyed as the appointment felt like it waste of time with inexperienced gynaes "having a go". I have spent most of the evening in tears I feel so frustrated. Thank you for being there and understanding xoxo

Poppy16 profile image
Poppy16 in reply to

How are you feeling now? Understandably you have been in tears...who wouldn't after a disappointing appointment. Could you ring your consultant's secretary and try to find out when you will have your next appointment? Maybe even ask for a cancellation appointment if another patient can't make theirs? Not right that you should suffer like this. Don't feel bad at all if you decide to complain about your consultant's assistant. It is an absolute disgrace that you weren't listened to properly. You won't look bad at all. On the contrary, they will!!! Maybe mention to GP about bleeding after sex. Try not to feel embarrassed as they won't-it's their job to treat/deal with everything to do with human body and they are more than used to hearing about this sort of issue. Really thinking about you.xo

in reply to Poppy16

Thank you.

I have pulled myself and I contacted my nice nurse and she was horrified by my appointment and is concerned my questions were left unanswered.Anyway a lady DR is phoning me later to discuss it further xoxo

romaluna2015 profile image
romaluna2015

Hi Jess

Sorry you didn’t get the appointment you needed with the consultant .

My periods got so heavy that I was unable to leave my house at all due to periods.. my gp put me on some tablets which really helped to lesson the heaviness maybe worth mentioning to your gp about how heavy the bleeds are.

Maybe ask your gp to write to the hospital and request a specialist appointment as soon as one is available .. the person who dealt with you at that appointment may not know what they are doing like the consultant does . Which should be in your notes about any previous tests and issues previously should also be in your notes.

Worth mentioning also to your gp about the bleed after intercourse possibly your endo is back xx

All the best and I’m here if you need me xx

Thank you. The problem I will have is the if the gynae hasn't believed me neither will the GP. All I can do is sit and wait for consultant's letter and if the bleeding after sex isn't mentioned I will play stupid and claim I was too embarrassed to mention it. That way I don't upset anyone. I just feel upset so many questions unanswered- not the appointment we planned xoxo

romaluna2015 profile image
romaluna2015 in reply to

Jess honestly gp’s and specialists have heard it all before . They won’t get upset over it. They wouldn’t do that job if they got upset over things like blood . It should be mentioned in case it is anything else going on . Better safe than sorry xx

misswinky34 profile image
misswinky34

bleeding after sex isn't normal, even if your smears are up to date. if you mean your having bowel issues from front, i don't know if that's what's going on, i was going to have endo removed from my bowel but they mentioned there was a chance the tissue connects elsewhere after which needs altering again. In the end i decided against the endo removal and now when i have AF i get alot of back passage bleeding. So I'm kind of the reverse to you. If the endo has cone back,it needs a dressing. Don't be fobbed off with a monkey and organ grinder situation. You shouldn't be left with a crap quality of life if it can be remedied. I would be saying you want to see the consultant, have a scan or proper diagnostic exam and get this sorted. think about yourself and the bean especially when your ttc ☺❤

in reply to misswinky34

Thank you I was surprised by his assistant's reaction to my heavy period and post sex bleeding. Anyway I have spoken to my lovely practice nurse who was horrified by it and got me an appointment to speak to nice lady DR. I honestly thought it was me over reacting- but thanks to people like you I took this further with the medics you are right it isn't normal and nor should I accept it. I am having swabs etc done and she wants to get to the bottom of why its happened. I was told to wait for consultants letter and if he doesn't mention the appointment I have been advised to write to him and believe me I will in a nice way of course. Thank you for being so supportive xoxo

emmab178 profile image
emmab178

Hi jess

I know you really like your consultant but with diagnosed severe endo you have a right to see a bgse specialist for your endo on the Nhs. It’s such a crappy disease where so much is unknown.

One word of advice is not all bgse specialists are as good as each other, there’s a FB group endorevisited uk support and education group that’s really good for asking about specific drs reputations and where to go in your area of the uk.

Thank you for your reply. I have spoken to my nurse and a GP and they are both shocked by the way I was so dismissed by the gynae. The GP will take swabs and try to find out why this is happening. I feel relieved to be listened to. I will await to see what my consultant writes and if he dosent address my concerns I have been advised to write to him and list my concerns and symptoms. If I don't get anywhere I will ask to be refereed. I cant live like this xoxo

You may also like...

So sad, disappointed and low...

after a miscarriage but I had weird symptoms before today, like headache, nausea, cramping....

How often is your appointment for FET?

Pregnant again and terrified!

absolutely terrified after my last pregnancy ended in miscarriage at 8 weeks. I’m over analysing...

Is this normal after a miscarriage?

you’re all doing ok! My partner and I had a miscarriage in March of this year. Suddenly, one day...

First IVF cycle - very nauseous and emotional

a massive gap in emotional support. I had a miscarriage in December 2017 at 13 weeks so it’s...