1st cycle of IVF failed.

Hi,

We have just been through our very first IVF cycle. Unfortunately this has failed.

My partner is fine and I have endometriosis (unsure what stage as the hospital lost my notes!!) but they have basically put me in the category of unknown fertility issues due to the fact my notes were lost post lap and dye operation. But that is a whole other story!

I'm currently 12 days post embryo transfer with a grade B blastocyst and a grad B and C in the freezer. We did the egg share scheme in the hope we can help someone else achieve their dream.

On day 8 post transfer I began what I thought was spotting. The following day it was really quite heaving and red blood. I called my clinic and the nurse advised this isn't good. Especially as I had done an early test on day 7 and it was negative. I was advised to keep on with the pessaries and do my official test Sunday as agreed.

Me being me, in my desperate state couldn't help but think maybe there is still a chance and began to go google crazy looking for some hope that my Little Button had survived.

I am currently 12 days post transfer and bleeding so heavy that it's flooding me (sorry tmi!) I have now come to terms with the fact that it has failed and we are devastated.

I had really hoped and prayed that this would work as it's been the best chance of getting pregnant we have had in the 4 1/2 years we've been trying. I was silly to expect it to work but you can't help but be filled with hope that your dream is about to be reality.

Has anyone else come on their period during the 2ww? My clinic advised that my body knew I wasn't pregnant so my period has overridden the pessaries. I'm worried that maybe they didn't prescribe me a high enough dose of progesterone. Even though they say it won't make/keep you pregnant it's just to thicken the lining of the womb.

I am doing as advised and continuing the pessaries but it's so hard when you are bleeding so heavy. It just seems pointless and makes me so upset when I just know in my heart there is no point. I guess I only have 3 more to do now.

I'm really scared that there is something wrong and when I have my frozen embies transferred that it will fail again. I've decided to have an endo scratch and use the glue And have both frozen embryos transferred so long as they are ok in the hope that I have a good chance.

Has anyone had any problems with frozen embryos no longer being viable during the defrosting stages?

Can anyone offer any advice on how to deal with the 2 week wait?

I'm sorry for the long post, just need some hope that this isn't the end for us.

Thanks in advance xx

13 Replies

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  • Hi there

    Did u test day 14 post transfer? I hope it was positive for you. I know what it's like to have a failed round and endometriosis

    I have now frozen embryos so can't help with that question but I'm hoping to start my 2nd round soon

    Good luck xx

  • Hi Penny24,

    I did test but it was a negative 😢 I knew it would be, the clinic said that my body knew I wasn't pregnant so started my period as normal!

    How did you feel after your negative test? I don't know why I thought IVF would be a given and just work, I guess without realising it I was so certain that it would work. Emotionally I have never been so upset about anything in my life. How did you feel?

    I have booked in to go to the clinic to try again, it's the only thing that's keeping me going. When do you start your second cycle?

    Have you had a period since your withdrawal bleed? I just wondered if this would be later than normal from all the drugs from the first cycle?

    I have everything crossed for you that your second round will be a success xx

  • Hiya

    I knew my round had failed too. I was on prostap for 3 months before my round in January. The prostap was meant to last 3 months, it lasted 7. The clinic over suppressed me (the admitted it) meaning basically my body thought it was in the menopause, only produced 5 eggs (all fertilised) but the embryos were not good enough to freeze. My period (when they started) were as they were before the ivf.

    I was devastated about the result but I knew it was negative before I took the test like u.

    I am meant to start my 2nd round in October but my husband is wanting to delay (he's not been well with anxiety) I'm gutted. I've got myself emotionally, physically ready and now talking about delaying it further is heartbreaking

    Xx

  • Oh I'm so sorry to hear this. I know it's so hard because you are so desperate to have a little bundle of joy and don't want to delay it any further. Have they advised you if they will do a different protocol for you next round?

    Have you thought about claiming medical negligence? If you complain they might compensate you and you can go private?

    I'm not familiar with Prostap, is that due to the endo? I was on Buserelin for about 4-6 weeks then Gonal F for 12 days.

    Xx

  • It's just been such a long journey. I had surgery September 16 which diagnosed endometriosis. The surgeon said 3 months prostap would give us the best chance of the ivf working but due to my bmi it lasted a lot longer with me.

    I get 2 rounds on the NHS. After round one had failed we went skiing and I broke my leg (likely due to the prostap) so I've had to recover from that first. Now my husband wants to delay. I'm ready to give up to b honest, just fed up of the delays and lack of results

    They are wanting to do the short protocol this time with me so no buserelin or prostap

    When do u think u will have another go?xx

  • Oh god, you really have been in the wars! I hope you have recovered ok?

    I think mentally you have to be in the right place to go through the process as it doesn't matter how much you read about it, it can never prepare you. it takes over your lives!

    I had a lap and dye in 2015 after trying for 2 1/2 years and they said I have 'significant endo' but they lost my notes so I never found out how bad it is or what I can do to treat it without going for the op again! After that I was in such a bad place, it took me nearly 2 years to get my head straight and in a place where I felt ready to start ivf. I'm 36 soon so to me I feel that time isn't really on my side, that can add pressure but regardless you have to be in a good place to go through this.

    If you are going to have a break I would really consider doing things that help you relax. I started acupuncture which I never thought it would help but it really does! It's so relaxing. Take up a hobby that takes your mind off of the next stage and give yourself something else to focus on that is positive.

    Please don't give up hope, sometimes it just take more time that you think to get yourself back to a position where you are ready to start again and if your head isn't there, the chances are your body wont respond well so just be selfish and take time for yourself and do what makes you happy then maybe look to start again in the new year. I find it can help if you have a date in the future to work towards. I never thought I'd be in a good place but now, even after a failed cycle I am determined to make it happen. it's hard to be patient when it's all that controls your mind from the moment you wake to the moment you go to sleep.

    I am going back to the clinic in 2 weeks to speak to the consultant, discussing the failed cycle and what to do next, I just want to throw myself back into it and try again, It's giving me something to focus on.

    Xx

  • Aw lovely it really is devastating 😢 all that hope shattered, it's such a cruel process... me and my partner have found it so difficult after 2 failed transfers it was really difficult trying to pick ourselves back up again. To get through it we booked some nights away, had a spa, tried to enjoy each others company. Had plenty of lazy days. Little by little the pieces go back together and before you know it your injecting for your next round ! Time is a great healer. I cried so hard I needed to get it out of my system had a few mopey days then put my make up on had my hair cut and thought right !!! Onto the next !!! One step closer to our baby ! We had two embies in the freezer, we are currently on our 3rd transfer so hoping we'l be lucky this time. It really is a roll of the dice but those BFNS won't last forever I'm sure ... look after yourself, the FET cycle is so much easier than the full cycle and you still have two beautiful embies waiting for you xxxxxxxx

  • P.s our frozen embryos have thawed perfectly :) every time xxxx

  • Hi ICSIBaby86,

    I wish you all the luck for your 3rd round and hope you get that big fat positive this time.

    Thank you for letting me know that yours thawed ok. We have ben so worried that they might not come through the process.

    How many embryos have you had transferred each time? I was thinking about having them both out back if they survive the thaw xx

  • Hi annon.

    Sorry for what you are going thru. I know exactly how u feel. My first Ivf failed as well. Took a year break due to continous spotting. Had a lap done to clean up endo...then tried again this year. I did a natural fet and it was successful. I am currently 25 weeks with my own set of pregnancy problems 😣....hoping that i make it to 38 weeks...however at least i know the thawing was successful and implantation was successful.

    Take a break dont rush into it, give your body some time to detox your stress and if you can do a natural cycle that might work best.

    Good luck and keep praying..God hears our cry.

    Xoxo.

  • Hi Purple Dragon,

    Thank you so much for your success story and a huge congratulations! I hope that everything goes well for you and you have a beautiful healthy baby. Your comments give us so much hope.

    We feel in a much better place now and we are just concentrating on the next cycle. I feel like my body will be in a better place too as I didn't have the greatest experience with the egg collection so fingers crossed our consultant offers us a natural FET cycle xx

  • You are welcomed. Thanks for your well wishes.

    I honestly think that a natural fet is the way to go...since the body knows bests how much of which hormones it needs to make it happen. Once you dont have not much of a problem ovulating its a go. And the good thing is when they do checks before the transfer if things are not optimum..you just wait for the following cycle.

    If your consultant doesnt offer it make sure you ask about that option and if its a no...then let them explain why so you can be more comfortable with their decision of a medicated cycle.

    Just keep fighting and telling yourself that you are not gona stop till you get this. Xx

  • Thank you, I will definitely ask my consultant, it's a more relaxed approach.

    It will happen, I'm going to stay positive throughout xx

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