Work and fertility treatment - Fertility Network UK

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Work and fertility treatment

Sayusayme profile image
7 Replies

Hey ladies angels

First of all I wanna congratulate all the bfp ladies and I wish you all the miracle henceforth.

I just have few queries...

1.

Me and my hubby we have a great relationship ❤️❤️❤️.as long as I am with and for his family .

But when it comes to my parents I get the feeling that they don't bother about anything. They expect me to be totally taking care of there family and less attention to my family.

Before my dad passed away I wanted to be with my dad as he was sick 😥.

But my in-laws were like make excuses for me not to go and to be with them.

Though I had argument with them that day and left to see my dad .....

so these like kind of few episodes make me feel like they don't care about my dad's or sisters. or me....

And my second query's

2.

During fertility treatment what you ladies do...

Leave the job or work and do the treatment...

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Sayusayme profile image
Sayusayme
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7 Replies
ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie

Hey Sayusayme! Sorry to hear about the situation with your husband's family. That's really odd behaviour. Have you spoken to your husband about it?

With regards to fertility treatment and work..... there is no right answer. Personally, I would love to leave work to focus on fertility treatments as I have had three rounds of IVF this year (and a missed miscarriage) and it has been a very demanding year, but I'm the breadwinner, so not really feasible. The only thing that is getting me through is reminding myself that not doing my best at work at the moment is okay as I have a more important focus. I'm taking time sick when I need to (quite a bit this year!), and I am clearly not in the running for any promotions! I am giving myself an arbritrary deadline of March at the moment to make it to, and then maybe looking at going part time or to a less demanding role.

Buisquits profile image
Buisquits

Rally sorry to hear about your family problems, best t on be discussed with your oh probably. In laws can be such a pain..

When it comes to work and treament I refused time off that I was offered as I could not imagine myself sitting at home and thinking, wondering, researching, worrying 24/7. My work is quick phased and busy so it was easy to take my mind off the treatment and get on with my life as normal. It was terrifying going through the ivf but meeting others and keeping my routines helpt me kept my life together and had good effect on my metal health. But everybody is different so it depends what do you feel you need.

All the best xxd

HPLondon profile image
HPLondon

Re work I dropped down to 4 days about six months ago (which really helped) and am lucky enough to have very supportive bosses who gave me time for appointments. This round I took off a couple of weeks around the treatment. Good luck with everything! X

Alyssa123 profile image
Alyssa123

Hey Sayusayme! I hope you are doing well. I am really sorry for the behavior of his family. As you said that your relationship with him is great, then talk about this with him. He will be able to help you out in such situations. If you have no trouble paying the number of treatments then leaving work for treatments is a good thing. But if you are in need of money, then i will suggest you balance between them. I have also had my babies through IVF and at that time, i left work and focused on my treatments. It really depends on your situation. I hope this helps you. Good luck. Take care. Stay blessed! Bye!

Lots8788 profile image
Lots8788

Hiya, sorry to hear about the family problems and hope they're resolved soon. Hope you're doing ok as you can be after your dad too, so sorry. re work, I now work full time over 4 days which has been a massive help as I feel I can switch off more on the days I'm off and have a proper break from it. We wouldn't be able to afford for me to give it up and i wouldnt want to as then would also lose mat leave pay for when the time does come 🤞Work are very good though with the ivf which makes a massive difference. I also think if I gave it up it wouldn't be good for my mental health. But we are all different and so do what is best for you. Wishing you lots of luck for your next steps and whatever you decide to do xx 🤞💕

sadievalentie profile image
sadievalentie

Hi there! How are you? I hope you are doing better now. I am really surprised with the behavior of his family. You really need to talk to him about this. Respect of your family is as important as respect of his family. You need to get this thing in his mind. Stopping someone from visiting their sick dad is inhumane. So if you think you can balance both then don't leave work. If your bank balance is tight then leaving work is not a good option for you as well. But in my opinion, to get the most out of the treatment and to be safe leaving work is better. I didn't leave work during my treatment because i opted for surrogacy. I only a short leave and then came back. I hope things get better for you. Good luck. Bye!

LorrieWalden profile image
LorrieWalden

Hi! How are you? This is something that i really hate. When your relationship is being affected by the family of your partner. I don't know why people do that because they are not just ruining life of the other person, but their own children as well. Still though, talk it out with your husband and give him a clear sign that you won't tolerate this anymore. As for work, hon that really depends on you. I have seen people working long time even with treatments. But for most of the people, it's difficult. So i will suggest you to leave work and focus on your treatments. You can work after that, but this time is precious. Make the best out of it. Goodluck! Goodbye!

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