Went to see fertility specialist for 1st time a couple of weeks ago after ttc for 18 mths and since I've been so low, on the verge of tears constantly. I know this is the 1st step and I should be excited for the possibility but in the appointment he as much as congratulated my other half on his excellent sperm and without saying made it clear the issue is with me.
I would like to think I am rational. My gorgeous partner has told me it is not my fault and that these things happen, but there is something there constantly making me feel low. I can't even explain what exactly is making me feel like this but whatever it is I can't shake it. I can't talk to friends or family because I don't know what exactly it is never mind what to say. I have taken to extreme comfort eating which is not like me. I haven't been exercising which I normally love and I am exhausted all the time. I'm not pregnant and have recent finished my period so its not AF.
I am a people manager and currently have to manage a pregnant lady and I can't be happy for her and I hate myself for it as she is so happy and it is not her fault what is happening to me.
Can anybody give me anything to help me feel better and get out of this mindset? My friends and family know what is happening and try to cheer me up by telling me everything will be OK but that is not helping and I am worried my upset and stress is making it even harder to conceive.
Sorry for going on. I am not great at sharing my problems but this is affecting every part of my life and I don't know what to do. I feel so lost