Sensitive post - first miscarriage - any advise welcome

[chickp]

So unfortunately our first pregnancy ended in miscarriage. I started bleeding on Sunday night at roughly 6 weeks and scan only showed a small empty sac ☹️ I think I’ve passed the worst of it now as there clearly wasn’t much there. I just don’t know what to do with myself now. We have been Ttc for nearly 4 years and are devestated. All the advise seems to be to take things one day at a time but I’m really struggling. DH is encouraged that we got pregnant but I’m not so sure as it went wrong so early I’m not sure if even counts?

Any advise/tips to help me get through the days ahead would be greatly appreciated? Also for nausea which is really bad today 🙄

Sorry for the rambling post!

[Hidden]

Aw I’m so sorry to read this. We suffered a missed miscarriage of twins in November so I understand the complete hopelessness you are feeling. I found that as my hormone levels decreased I felt immensely better, I still think about it pretty much all the time but I am now able to talk openly about our experience without the tears and feel hope again for the future. Look after yourself, cry when you need to and stay close to your partner.

Your pregnancy definitely counted and there is hope in that you conceived. Unfortunately miscarriage is far more common than I ever realised and there is no reason to believe a second pregnancy will not result in a healthy child just because this one ended the way it did.

As for the nausea, I found cup a soup to be one of the few things I could tolerate and the sickness bands in my wrists helped.

Xx

[Hidden]

First of all so sorry for your loss & yes of course it counts. It counts the moment you see a positive test. I had a chemical pregnancy last year. I was 4 and a half weeks. It was so heartbreaking. I never thought I’d ever get through it, but time as they say is a healer. Yours is very early days & don’t expect too much from yourself. My advice is one day at a time & each day will get better. You never forget the loss but do learn to with the loss. You can access counselling via your GP if you are really struggling with it. I hope you have lots of support around you around this difficult time.Unfortunately there is no miracle cure, it’s a grieving process. We chose to see our loss as a positive; we managed to conceive after 6 years of never managing to! It took time to get there.My fertility doctor said something beautiful “ through the dark cloud the silver lining is that you did get pregnant and this is positive.”

Please do remember just because this pregnancy didn’t work out doesn’t mean the next pregnancy wouldn’t. I am now 19 weeks; due my endometriosis & 2 further surgeries it took us 13 months after our loss to conceive, but we got there & so will you. Most ladies that suffer a loss will go on to have a healthy baby & so will you. Your miracle is around the corner waiting for you xoxo

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Hi chickp. So sorry to hear that you have lost your first little one, and yes, it does count, however early on the loss occurred. Hope you've got plenty of support around you just now. Hopefully you will be able to try again and lets hope that you have a successful pregnancy. Thinking of you. Diane

[AJJ123]

I totally relate. I lost mine in October/November just gone. I haven’t had the courage to unfreeze my embie yet as I’m still scared it’ll happen again or not work at all.

It’s totally rubbish and at times I feel like crying over it. I’m over the miscarriage, just not the longing for a healthy pregnancy and baby part xx