Another BFN 😪💔: I feel like I’ve been... - Fertility Network UK

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Another BFN 😪💔

Hannah143 profile image
62 Replies

I feel like I’ve been punched hard in the stomach, I feel physically sick. I feel we are another step towards being forced to accept a life without children.

We tested first thing and got another negative. I’m off to have a private HCG test first thing this morning as my Spanish clinic needs a blood test result before we can move forward, but I’m not expecting a different result.

I will be demanding a lot of tests before we move forward and use our last frostie with our clinic.

Today was my third Donor Egg Transfer, my 4th Donor embie as I had 2 put back the first time. Why o why is this not working??? I thought moving to Donor Eggs, although the hardest decision to make was the right one with a good outcome, however now I’m feeling like that may not work either!

We are running out of road and not really sure where to turn next. Any ideas ladies?

Xx

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Hannah143
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62 Replies

So sorry to hear this, negatives are rubbish ☹ look after your self.

Sending huge hugs x

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to

Thank you xx

So sorry to hear this Hannah. I have no experience of IVF yet so I can't offer any advice, but I hope you get some answers and a positive outcome soon. All the best xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to

Thank you xx

Tugsgirl profile image
Tugsgirl

Sorry Hannah. I hope you get some answers xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to Tugsgirl

Thank you xx

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Sorry to hear this Hannah! As you know Ive only just started this DE journey myself so no useful advice, I do hope the clinic can offer some more though surrounding your treatment. Sending a massive cuddle!xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to Cinderella5

Thank you, so do I. Originally I thought the donor eggs would solve the quality and quantity issues, but all Frosties have been the very best quality so the issues lie with me and implantation. I will let you know what they say! Xx

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5 in reply to Hannah143

Yes, keep us posted!xx

Man this whole process is the worst isn’t it! Just when you are hopeful your worst fears are confirmed again. It doesn’t mean it’s the end though and I really admire your courage to have gone this far, you are a strong woman and are doing your very best xxx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to

Thank you, nope not the end yet, we have 1 more frostie left. But this was my 8th in total, and you have to start asking yourself when is it enough, when is it time to stop. We spent £££££ and been battling through this for years. I want to keep going but there is more doubt now in my decisions. Thank you for you sweetie xx

in reply to Hannah143

Come on Frostie! Be the one! Good luck xxx

Lou9 profile image
Lou9

So so sorry to hear your sad news. It is really unfair. Xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to Lou9

Thank you, yes you’re absolutely bang on, it is absolutely bloody unfair!! I wish just for one time it will be my time xx

Loopielu profile image
Loopielu

😞 sending a hug and positive thoughts for the remaining frostie xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to Loopielu

Thank you lovely xx

Dream32 profile image
Dream32

I have no advice to give and I'm so sorry to hear this. Hope you find the answers and your dreams come true x

Hey

Sorry for ur news would love to give you a positive feedback on hanging in there but I can’t it’s a cruel and unjust journey without explanation ☹️

I have used my own eggs 3 times and failed had a fresh transfer using donor and it took but we lost him. Went onto use the same donor again for a fresh cycle froze the eggs had 1 x 2 excellent blasts transferred but a BFN flowed by last frozen and guess what A BFN. Donors are not a gurantee we are about to embark on our final fresh last go GOD willing a healthy set to transfer when the time comes and that will be either our time or not supposed to be.

Big hugs x

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to

Thank you Tamtam it’s heartbreaking isn’t it. Our journies are very similar. If your latest fresh set from a new donor? Xx

in reply to Hannah143

It will be all

New, new clinic new donor and fresh cycle not sure I feel the FET cycles I believe fresh is better dunno why suppose for me it worked being a fresh cycle and not frozen x

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to

Good luck sweetie 🍀, would you mind letting me know the clinic you’re using and if it’s in the UK/abroad? Hope that’s ok xx

in reply to Hannah143

I sent you a pm x

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to

Thank you xx

Hopeandwishes profile image
Hopeandwishes

So sorry, thinking of you and sending love x

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to Hopeandwishes

Thank you xx

Gifty2018 profile image
Gifty2018

Said times Hannah! Big strong and I have everything crossed for your last embies. Huge huge dear xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to Gifty2018

Thank you xx

Shanks_21 profile image
Shanks_21

So sorry to hear this lovely hope you can get the information you need and move forward towards a more positive result next time! Sending you lots of love xxxx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to Shanks_21

No word from my clinic yet, I got my blood test back about 3.30 with a reading of 4 HCG so now waiting to here back from my clinic. They want me to continue to take all my meds until they say so xx

So sorry to hear this thinking of you xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to

Thank you, right back at ya xx

E_05 profile image
E_05

So sorry to read this, BFN’s are really tough. Really hope you get some answers xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to E_05

Yes, I would have thought I’d be an old veteran at this by now! It’s doesn’t get an easier xx

E_05 profile image
E_05 in reply to Hannah143

I don’t think it ever gets easier especially as each time we put ourselves through another cycle it’s for the hope we will finally get our happy ending xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to E_05

Thank you lovely xx

So sorry to read this. Take care xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to

Thank you xx

Sez73 profile image
Sez73

I’m just so sorry to read your news love. How many times do I ask myself that same question, why oh why is this happening? it Is so incredibly frustrating being so desperate to get answers which never come. I’m soon to embark on my second DE go so have no real input as our consultant gave us no real reason for it not working first time around so I can’t say anything useful at this stage. But I hope you can get more tests done to enable you to see something which may have been missed. It is such a horrid thought to start wondering what if this doesn’t work, choosing the DE route is a massive decision in the first place isn’t it, when u expect it should bring more hope and it doesn’t is doubly cruel. I hope you can get some answers, it is so stressful to go through. Thinking of you & hope you can go in with more answers & new things to try next go and get the result you so deserve xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to Sez73

Thank you, yes exactly! You think it’s a step forward and are told about the amazing success rates with donor eggs. I’m waiting to hear back from my clinic. Thanks for your message xx

Sez73 profile image
Sez73 in reply to Hannah143

I know, terribly frustrating. You think you get more hope then it all starts again for you. I’m so sorry it didn’t work. I hope u can push for as many tests as possible to try and seek some logical answers which will help you move forward. My heart goes out to you. Good luck and I hope the clinic gives you some decent feedback xxx

Oh gosh, I am so sorry to read this. Possibly a change of clinic xxx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to

Yes, got 1 frostie left then we need to make a new plan! Xx

vic77 profile image
vic77

Oh hun I am so so sorry and I feel your pain I really do. You have been so strong and brave to get this far it just all seems so cruel. We are in a similar ish position to you now with 3 fresh bfns on my eggs and first fet this week. We are pondering adoption as I don't know if I am as strong as you to decide on donor eggs and still get bfns😢😢part of me thinks adoption is more likely to give us a child although we are at very early stages of talking about this. I too am trying to think of a life without children now as a reality too and trying to prepare myself for that .not easy..I am sending you the biggest hug and masses of love xxx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to vic77

Big hugs back to you sweetie, it’s incredibly scary isn’t it! I just can’t get my head round a life without children 😪, sending you lots of love and hugs back xx

DC13 profile image
DC13

I am so sorry to read your post and sending you a big hug.

I am not sure which clinic in Spain you are using but it would be worth you skyline with them to ask suggestions for ways forward.

I had a BFP in out first DE cycle after 6 negative cycles using my own eggs. Unfortunately we has a missed miscarriage. I had a FET and that was BFN. I has some additional tests performed which were expensive eg biopsies. Cultures. ER mapping for receptivity . 3d imaging blood tests for immune tests etc. This might be a route you could consider if the clinic provides such tests.

I am not sure if this helps but definitely worth talking to the clinic and raising your concerns.

Xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to DC13

Thank you, yes we definitely need to investigate tests before we use our last one. I’ve had a few tests, biopsies, etc but not exhausted the list, so am expecting that we start to talk these through. I just pray for some answers! Xx

Poppy16 profile image
Poppy16

Really sorry to hear your news. Trusting you get the advice/support/help you need. Take care. X

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to Poppy16

Thank you Poppy, no answers yet, still waiting to hear from my clinic xx

alockie profile image
alockie

I am sorry you are going through this. Have you considered PGS NGS to increase your chances? xx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to alockie

Thank you, I haven’t had that, I only have one frostie left so won’t have it on that but will consider that if we go for another fresh donor cycle xx

Lynnr54 profile image
Lynnr54

Sorry to hear this. I think you’re right to be pushing to make sure you’ve explored all possible avenues for why it might not be working before using your last DE and I hope you get some answers. Have you tried NK testing?

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to Lynnr54

Thank you, no we haven’t but that is on my list of tests we should do before we transfer our last embie xx

Amanda86 profile image
Amanda86

So sorry 🙁 Xxx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to Amanda86

Thank you xx

Penders profile image
Penders

Sorry for your negative test. I hope that you get some answers before your next go! Sending you a hug xxx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to Penders

Thank you xx

katya38 profile image
katya38

Oh hannah so sorry people just assume that donor eggs will solve all your problems that is so heartbreaking. I guess you need to take time to heal before you can even think of your next steps. Thinking of you xxx

Hannah143 profile image
Hannah143 in reply to katya38

Thank you, it’s hard to get my head round. They say there is about 96% success rate after 3 donor transfers - well not for me!! Xx

7AVA profile image
7AVA

Thinking of you Hannah. This whole process really sucks. Look after yourself and I wishing you every success with your last frostie xxxx

Sweets1 profile image
Sweets1

Wishing you all the best! Xx

WeeMrsH profile image
WeeMrsH

So sorry you’ve had this news Hannah. Keep smiling, hard as it might be. Really hope you get some answers xx

CheshireKit profile image
CheshireKit

Hi lovely I’m so so sorry to hear your news 😞 Hope you manage to get some tests to find out what can be done to get this to work. Have you had the natural killer cells test? I was tester following failed rounds and MC with my own eggs to check if this was an implantation issue. Really hope you get some answers Sending big hugs xx

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