Hello: Hello everyone, I have never... - Fertility Network UK

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Zowiey profile image
23 Replies

Hello everyone, I have never posted in a forum before but felt like I needed to speak with someone after today's news. So my partner and 1 have been trying to get pregnant for about 18 months. We have been back and forth to the hospital for various tests and today we went back for our results. The doctor has said that because my partners sperm count is so low we will need IVF. I am so scared and worried about the whole thing. Does anyone have any advice.

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Zowiey profile image
Zowiey
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23 Replies
Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Hey there and welcome! Sorry you've had bad news today about your OH sperm count! I am in this situation too and my poor hubby felt like such a failure which broke my heart! I can't offer much advice as you really just need to go along with the advice of the clinicians. The only thing I would say is try to be there for each other as you'll both have up and down days! Sending you a big hug! If you want to ask anything then feel free. Unfortunately we haven't had success yet but haven't given up either!!xx

Zowiey profile image
Zowiey in reply to Cinderella5

Thank you for taking the time to reply 😊 Have you started you IVF treatment yet? If so how long were you waiting if you don't mind me asking

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5 in reply to Zowiey

I'm in Scotland. We've done 1 round which we got told to discount followed by two unsuccessful rounds! It took from GP to hospital around 6 months to start meds but it varies around the country!xx

Zowiey profile image
Zowiey in reply to Cinderella5

Thank you ❤️

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Should have said too, you haven't said if a medical condition has cause this or if it's unknown but there are a few things your partner can try. Loose fitting underwear, eat healthily, drink less alcohol, no drugs, stop smoking, cycling can apparently affect things, no hot baths....keep the temp down downstairs! Think that's it!xx

ch319 profile image
ch319

Oh it is such a difficult time at the beginning. You will get loads of support on here. My partner also had sperm problems and I highly recommend wellman vitamins and proxeed I think that's how it's spelt. It helped improve his swimmers. Good luck on your journey xx

Zowiey profile image
Zowiey in reply to ch319

Thank you ❤️

Hello me and my partner are in the same situation his count is very low too! Like you advised ivf, we are now at egg transfer stage so only time will tell if it will work but we are positive as it's been fairly smooth so far! You just have to do what you think is best and stay strong for each other hope it all works out for you xxx

Zowiey profile image
Zowiey in reply to

Good luck I really hope it goes well for you ❤️ Xx

Scarlett13 profile image
Scarlett13

Hello and welcome! My partner's sperm is ok but I have 2 blocked tubes and hardly any cervix left, have my initial consultation with the ivf clinic a week tomorrow. We are all here because of different factors but on the same path aiming for the same destination?! I've heard there's lots that can be done for low sperm count. How is your fertility? Have you had tests? You only need one single good sperm for a procedure where they insert a sperm directly into an egg so anything is possible xxx

Zowiey profile image
Zowiey in reply to Scarlett13

Yes I have had all of the tests and they said I am not ovulating often. A couple of people have mentioned taking conception vitamins so I will give those a go. I didn't know they could actually put the sperm into the egg. It quite amazing what modern medicine can do isn't it! Xx

It is a very difficult time when you first get the news. I remember it very well. We were in a similar position but my OH had low sperm motility so we were advised to have ICSI as opposed to IVF. There is no magic wand that can be waved to make you feel better. It is a difficult journey but one you can get through together. The best thing my husband and I did before we started any treatment was take a last minute holiday together. It gave us time together to relax ready for what was to come. This was now nearly 4 years ago and we were extremely blessed with a beautiful daughter who is nearly 2. I hope this helps in some way. Lots of love and luck on your journey 💕💕

Zowiey profile image
Zowiey in reply to

Your post makes me feel hopeful, thank you x

Lamorna80 profile image
Lamorna80

Welcome to the forum. This place is going to help a lot on your journey, if only for reassurance that there are many others in the same boat.

We've ended up going down the ivf/icsi route because of my husbands sperm motility and mobility.

The only advice I can offer is to be patient. There's a lot of waiting in this game....for appointments/test results/scans/ pregnancy tests! It really is a rollercoaster & I wish I'd found this forum before I started my first round.

We're just about to start round 2. It is a game of chance but if you stay patient and positive, you'll get through it :) xx

Zowiey profile image
Zowiey in reply to Lamorna80

Thank you I like your positivity xx

MissyR profile image
MissyR

Just to echo what others have said, it's a real shock and upset when you're first told you need ivf. I'm sorry you're having to go through this. Like you, my husband and I had been trying to conceive for about 18 months with tests after about 12 months. My husband was told to take proxeed plus (think someone else mentioned this) and it really helped to improve my husband's sperm motility. We had a round of icsi (where they select the best sperm) and the proxeed helped to ensure there were enough decent swimmers....I'm not sure i have any wisdom but please do feel free to get in touch if you want to. Take care

Zowiey profile image
Zowiey in reply to MissyR

Yes I saw someone else mention this, I'm going to pick some up today and see if that helps at all 🙏

Jonesjp profile image
Jonesjp

HiZowie, I can't answer as not in the same situation as you, but just wanted to welcome you to the group x x

Zowiey profile image
Zowiey

Thank you everyone for your kind messages. I feel like I am in a bit of a situation at the moment. My partner and I are due to get married and have already booked our honeymoon to the Caribbean. But I found out yesterday if we go on honeymoon we will have to wait 6 months from when we return before starting treatment which would be like a year from now. I really want to go on honeymoon but I think I really want to have a baby even more. I don't know what to do.

Hi Zowiey! I know it's scary, I might have to start soon and I am also terrified. But there is another part of me that is excited. If this is really the way for bringing a baby into our hands, let's welcome It ;-)

I am trying and relax with the feeling that now somebody will help us. It will probably be hard, but then why worrying twice (now and then), or It might better than we expect, so perhaps we are worrying unnecesarely. Let's try staying positive!

Lynnr54 profile image
Lynnr54

Hi Zowiey, I was also in the same situation as you. I also felt it was scary but in some ways it was also a relief to know why I wasn't getting pregnant. I think in some ways a diagnosis is easier than unexplained fertility as the hospitals can at least treat it. If your partners count is the issue then you will most likely be given ICSI which is a treatment whereby for each egg you produce they select a single sperm and manually inject it into the egg, thus avoiding all the issue about poor swimmers etc. Agree with the advice others have given about how to improve sperm quality but would also add no sitting with laptop on knee and don't keep mobile phone in trouser pocket. A sperm lifecycle is 100 days so that's how long you need to keep it up for prior to treatment.

In terms of the holiday I can see why it's a tough call. The IVF journey can be long and stressful (and having a baby is the same) so you may decide to have a final relaxing holiday before starting the journey. On the other hand the journey can be long so you might just want to get it underway. Why do they make you wait so long after getting back? Could you change your location if that's one of the reasons they won't let you start sooner? If you don't mind me asking how old are you? If you're over 35 then egg quality can start to go downhill so most places would recommend doing sooner rather than later but if you're younger then other than patience and frustration there's no reason not to wait.

You also asked about timing. I'm in Leeds and waited 6 weeks from GP referral to first hospital appt. Then it was another 3-4 months for second appt where they told us we need ICSI then about 6 weeks for a nurse appointment and then I started treatment the following cycle. All in all about 7-8 months from referral to start of treatment.

You're in the right place for support along the journey and to ask any questions you may have. Good luck with whatever you decide!

Zowiey profile image
Zowiey

Thank you everyone, we decided to cancel our holiday (the company would give us all our money back though even though I explained we physically could not go because of the Zika virus) anyway we have our next app at the hospital in 3 weeks time. I'm feeling excited and more relaxed than I did the other day. I've taken on board lots of your advice and my partner and I have started taking vitamin supplements. We're also going to start acupuncture on Monday. Will be sure to keep you all informed. Good luck to us all 🍀❤️

TeamMonkey profile image
TeamMonkey

Hi,

Just wanted to send a big & say I know how you're feeling! Exactly same situation as us! Hubby had low count, but we knew it was likely as he had lost a testicle & then had mumps which affected his other teste. Has your hubby any apparent issues? One thing I'd advise getting to the bottom of his problem, it's annoying that men's issues seems to be brushed under the carpet. If his count is low they need to investigate what could be causing it. For us we knew there was no fixing it. So had ICSI. Good news is with only male issues I've seen many have success. I'd advise looking at his sperm analysis and seeing if he has low motility, if he has get him on vitamins; co enzyme q10, vit c, selenium etc. Cut out alcohol and caffeine in the months prior to any treatment, and eat super clean.

To give you you hope we did the above, first ICSI we had a baby boy. We tried again in Feb on a frozen cycle and sadly miscarried. But had another try in June and I'm now 10 weeks pregnant with baby no 2. So it can happen xx

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