Beginning of our journey.

[Bsrtaycaeny]

Hi,

First time posting here but looking for some guidance/reassurance.

My partner and I have been trying for 18 months and began the process of tests with doctors etc last month. Had an appointment following test results on Wednesday, and we have been told we will be referred over to fertility clinic and will likely need ivf/icsi to conceive due to low motility in partners sperm. Dr did say it was possible to conceive naturally however our chances weren't great, and this is the likely cause of all the months trying with no success. Is anyone in a similar situation or able to even give some advice on what wev been told. Feeling more than a little lost just now.

Lots of luck and love to you all.

[Saarah92]

Hey Hun, I was in the same situation last December. Ttc for 3 years and had gone through all the tests and so had partner and we were told he had low count so was referred for IVF/ICSI at Hammersmith hospital.

I was really devastated that IVF was our only option as I'm only 25 y/o however I picked myself and decided to get on with it as my want for a child outweighed my upset.

I could go on forever but long story short, it has been an emotional journey but not as difficult as I thought it was going to be. I had my egg transfer on Monday and due to test next Friday.

Forums are an amazing way to speak to such inspirational ladies who are going though similar circumstances with so many inspiring stories. Try not to stress and just take it as it comes.

Don't hesitate to ask questions (even if they sound weird to you) there's always someone that's going through the same thing.

Stay positive and eat healthy!

I wish you all the best and don't hesitate to ask me anything!

Xx

[Bsrtaycaeny in reply to Saarah92]

Thank you for replying to me x

I'm 25 too,fit and healthy and like you were I'm devastated that this is our option, however trying to get my positive head on and embrace what's ahead of us.

You're reply helps me so much, I had thought we would be waiting a lot longer to the process under way so it's reassuring to know you're already in the midst of it. Have u gone through NHS or private? Sending you lots of positive thoughts and hope your wishes come true next Friday. 💕 Xxx

[hannahi]

Hi I'm in a similar position - we've been TTC for 18 months & are currently going through the process of having tests done at the Fertility clinic. My OH has v low sperm count, morphology & motility so a triple whammy! GP said will need ICSI to conceive, & even that may not be enough - may have to think about donor sperm etc. Was a complete shock to us to find this out, devastated doesn't even cover it. We have come slightly more to terms with it now. We're just in the process of having my tests done at the mo to see if I have any probs to add to the fun, & then we'll have an appt with the consultant to see what he recommends.

This forum is great for asking questions, or just to vent your frustrations - the support is great. If you read people's stories on here you'll see there are a lot of ppl who have been through a lot of stuff on here.

It's rubbish what we're all having to go through but I think all we can do is take it one step at a time and stay positive...we have to believe we'll get there in the end, and it'll all be worth it.

Feel free to ask me any questions.

Good luck with it all.

Xxx.

[Bsrtaycaeny in reply to hannahi]

Thank you for replying to me x

I'm sorry to hear about you and your partners circumstances, but you are right in that we have to keep that belief there that we will get what we wish for in the end.

Have you felt it to be a long process so far? I'm trying to get in the mindset that it will take however long is necessary but I know I will be frantically checking for next appointments etc, and I don't want to forget to enjoy the now whilst we wait.

Also we have opened up to our parents and my sister about what is going on, but unsure whether to let others know or not? I was already struggling with pregnancy conversations etc before hand and don't know how il cope with this having got our latest news.

Thanks again for getting back to me, sending you lots of luck on your journey 💕 Xxx

[hannahi]

The GP referred us in March, we were seen in May by the Fertility nurse & I had a scan in May also. We have an appointment booked for next week for them to discuss some more blood tests that they want to do. So basically it was a bit of a fight to get referred but once we did appointments are happening fairly quickly. I'm not a patient person & I find the waiting the hardest thing...it does seem to be the norm on the NHS that there's a wait of about 1 month between appointments, & I think once the treatment's decided on there'll be a bit of a wait before starting treatment...I'm expecting to start in the autumn, and then anything earlier is a bonus! I think if you can find anything & everything to distract you whilst waiting it helps - I've taken up running & have entered a couple of races to aim for.

I've told most people about our circumstances, including my boss, as I felt I had to explain about booking appointments & I knew she'd be supportive...and she has been, and I've found that in general it helps with everyone knowing as it stops the "when are you going to have children?" questions and the like...Although the downside is you get the insensitive comments like "I'm really excited for you that you're having IVF!" but I tell myself ppl have their hearts in the right place, just don't know what to say.

What area of the country are you in?

[Bsrtaycaeny in reply to hannahi]

Thank you, that sounds positive in terms of timescales for you. I'm just outside Edinburgh, where are you? I called the clinic I assume we will be being referred to yesterday who said it is upto a 12 week wait for our first appointment, and then from there around 4-6 weeks. it's all got a bit blurry and I've got so much information going through my mind.

Yeh I plan to, I have a horse who I thought I would be taking a break from riding over the summer with hoping to be pregnant but since that isn't the case I plan to keep myself busy with riding etc.

I'm unsure whether to continue to keep trying naturally just now, we obviously will be in some sense but I mean in regards to how actively we have been trying before. My partners first sperm results had 11% motility then the second was 22%. completely unsure about it all.

Hope your appointment next week goes well and things keep on the right track for you and your partner xxx

[hannahi in reply to Bsrtaycaeny]

Yeh they said up to 12 wks for our first appt aswell but we were actually seen in 8wks. I would say with your results it's well worth continuing trying naturally as there's every chance it may happen naturally (without wanting to get your hopes up). I'm at Shrewsbury for my treatment so not sure about waiting times etc in Edinburgh.

Good luck with it all and hope you get your first appointment through soon.

Xxx.

[Bsrtaycaeny in reply to hannahi]

Thank you, fingers crossed it doesn't take as long as the 12 weeks for us too. I think that's our plan because while there's a chance we owe it to ourselves to keep going.

Good luck to you too 💕 Xxx

[Tw1986]

Hey Hun me and my husband are currently having ivf due to different reasons to yours but don't worry you have just as much chance as any of us on here. You will get lots of information in due course but these guys on here have gave me so much support through all this and you will get lots to. Whatever happens keep your chin up and keep strong xx

[Bsrtaycaeny in reply to Tw1986]

Thank you, I saw some of your posts early. Lovely to see someone who's so far on in the process and very reassuring, got everything crossed for you and sending lots of love.

Never been one for online forums etc but so glad I came on here today, just the extra bit of kindness that's needed. Thanks again 💕Xxx

[E_05]

Hey,

You've definitely found the right place, this forum is an amazing place to ask questions and get support.

I know it seems daunting people told that IVF is the best option but everything does become clearer. I can't say on timings as I was already under my fertility clinic when I was told IVF is my last option but between seeing my consultant to sign the papers etc and starting it was 4 months.

Try to stay positive, there always people to talk to here xx

[E_05 in reply to E_05]

Sorry that was meant to say being not people.

[Bsrtaycaeny in reply to E_05]

Hey,

Thank you for replying to my wee post. That's a really reassuring length of time from having it agreed by consultant to actually starting the process. Is it icsi or ivf you're having? I know they are pretty much the same just down to how the fertilisation is done. I hope your journey is going well, sending you lots of luck.

Xxx

[E_05 in reply to Bsrtaycaeny]

That's okay, I was already under my fertility clinic as had clomid 7 months prior to starting IVF but hopefully it won't be to long a wait for you. I know how hard it is waiting for appointments but if you can try and plan things in between them to look forward to or at least help the time go quicker. Are you NHS funded or paying privately? Xx

[Bsrtaycaeny in reply to E_05]

We are under NHS, and will be going to Edinburgh for our treatment. What about yourself? I feel in a sense wer lucky that the doctor has suggested IVF straight off, but I'm unsure as to what the consultant will say, if things will change again etc. The dr said we will need ivf because of my partners low motility and I've read up online and that does seem to be the solution to it. Just hoping and praying nothing else gets flung into the mix. Xxx

[E_05 in reply to Bsrtaycaeny]

Were NHS funded to, in Cambridge. A few people I know have gone straight to IVF referrals when there has been problems with the sperm. When we found out I have a couple of problems it also came to us a massive shock that we would need to even go to a fertility clinic but like you we were actually relieved to finally be able to start IVF after everything else we'd been through with no success xx

[Bsrtaycaeny in reply to E_05]

You're right it is a massive shock, we put the long time trying down to stress, not timing it perfectly, anything we could think of and just assumed we were going to the doctors for that extra reassurance. Just feels like a massive blow but I'm also so relieved to be out of the rollercoaster of waiting for a period and the devastation that brings at least for a little while. Thanks for your reassurance today 💕 Xxx

[E_05 in reply to Bsrtaycaeny]

I totally get that and the constant thinking of 'well were concentrating on doing this or that' and trying to not make a big thing of the fact your not falling pregnant when it's actually a massive thing to deal with emotionally each month. Ah that's okay, you can always drop me a message if you want/need to chat anytime xx