Surrogacy question

Hello everyone! I decided to write here to get some advices. Would appreciate all your replies!

My name is Angela. As I’m getting older the chances of successful pregnancy for me are getting lower and lower. I’ve ttced for 7 years for now – iui, ivf, icsi. Nothing worked. Basically I’m at the position of a women who got divorced once because of the whole stress me and my ex were receiving due to my unexplained infertility. I’ve gone through a major depression. I thought life can’t get any worse. But then I met my current husband, the love of my life. I’ve never considered surrogacy as the proper way out but now as we thought that surrogacy is our only option. I’m old, 47 years already, always thought that being a mother for women is the only purpose of our lives.

We do not have enough money to afford it here in America. So we are looking for a clinic overseas. Is there anyone who has the experience with an international clinic abroad, maybe in Europe or elsewhere? Would like to read your stories and advices.

29 Replies

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  • Hi there,

    I know a clinic in Ukraine called biotexcom

    They have a full surrogacy program and provide personal managers to handle the whole process. The surrogates they use can be trusted as thorough tests and checks are performed to assure they are a right fit.

    Might be worth sending an email to them?

  • Hello honey! I was diagnosed with glomerulonephritis after the birth of my first child. Because of this desease I had two pregnancy terminations. My dh and I decided to turn to surrogacy. It was our last chance to become parents. I was in search 24/7 during a couple of months. It was really hard to find a reliable clinic with affordable price. After some discussions with ladies on different forums we went to Ukrainian clinic biotexcom. The clinic provided us with everything needed, so we felt absolutely comfortable in foreign country. The whole process was under their control. They found surrogate mother for us in 2,5 months. We didn't expect that the clinic will found surrogate mother for such short period of time. It was a great surprise! Our son was born on October 2015. We paid approximately 40 000 euros for everything. Though there were so many people and lines were very long, but I think the result worth it. We were met by taxi driver. Then taxi was carrying us across the city. We didn't have to find the clinic by ourselves! I'm sure we would be lost. Especially considering the fact that neither I nor my husband know the language. The taxi brought us to the clinic. It's a very modern building I must say. We also had a translator so there were no misunderstandings at all. That girl translated everything for us and also answered all our questions. We stayed at nice apartment with all needed facilities and even more) We had no problems with food supply or communication. Thanks to smartphones with Ukrainian numbers we could easily talk to our program coordinator. All these services were already included into our package. There were no hidden fees or extra charges. We paid only that single price. We didn't choose a surrogate mother by ourselves. Her appearance doesn't matter. The most important are her health and ability to bear a child. So our doctor chose sm for us. Our sm lived in Ukraine with her family during the procedure. We were coming for ultrasound checks. Also the clinic provided us with all details about condition of sm and our baby at least once per month. I wish you good luck with your procedure!

  • Thank you both honeystef and jennyleee for responding. It's really nice of you to share with me your surrogacy journey, jennylee. From you story it seems like it is really popular clinic over there, you had to go through a lot of queues?

    To find a surrogate for 2,5 month for such busy clinic it is impressive!

    After your reply I feel the relief because it sounds like you are really satisfied with their work. Thank you.

  • Hi, we've experienced DE IVF in Biotexcom clinic. Now we're happy parents of a 1.3 year old boy! :) In case it didn't work we were considering surrogacy. So here is the procedure looks like there briefly.

    The very first thing is that a couple must be officially married in time the first appointment is conducted. Also a couple has to show the papers proving that a woman can’t get pregnant. Then the necessary tests must be done. All the things discussed with dr and documents signed. The second appointment is conducted in order to get sperm and retrieve eggs.

    This very day the eggs are fertilized. On the fifth day they transfer the embryo to surrogate mother. Then a couple waits two weeks for the pregnancy test. In a month approximately the surrogate mother has her first scan. She has to do them every month since that. A couple receives each time photo and video from the procedure with translation. On week 32-34 SM and a couple come to Kiev and they all wait for the childbirth at the place. After the birth surrogate signs the papers of her baby refusal. Then a couple just waits for the papers in the embassy to be ready. Then they fly home.

    Hope this helps. Good luck! X

  • Thanks for explaining me the whole procedure! You said that you went through IVF DE treatment, so could you describe the service over there in biotex. How was your experience there? xx

  • oh, please don't tell you'r old, sis. you have all ur life ahead and i believe that even after all your losses you'll be blessed for ur long-awaited parenting. our stories have much in common. i also know what a loss and failure is with an early mc and failed ivfs. now i seldom recall those times cause i'm a happy mom of my twin baby boys born by a surrogate still mine. we went internationally, two times. bfn in Greece (de surro) and then bfp in Ukraine (de surro). i'm sure u and dh should keep on searching for best options for you. feel free to pm me. i'll willingly help. take care and chin up

  • I have recently started my tx, although I can't call it the treatment in the full meaning of the word but... I am really worried though.. I was told that even women my age could get pregnant with ivf, for me it is already impossible. I have been opting for the tx on my own eggs but in the clinic I was told that they could give me only one chance oe because I have the low success rate.. And we decided to not to take a chance and we decided to go for the surr de.

    I have signed with biotex clinic too as many of you. I was advised it and I am really thankful to everyone who engaged me into ukrainian fertility clinics words.

    Where have you gotten your tx exactly? The thing is, that in one clinic I have decided to visit were only ukrainian couples so we thought that it was mostly for ukrainians, than we visited biotex where met a lot of foreigners and I have been talking to some of them since the first visit. As for now, we are waiting to be matched.

  • Hi dear! I also can't carry a baby by myself. I was born without an uterus. There is no chance for me to get pregnant and feel my baby pushing into my stomach. Still I'm grateful there are places and people who can help us with our problem. At the same time this is really hard to find good agency or clinic. There are so many scammers, who want to become rich, using poor people like us. We were looking for reliable clinic with professional doctors and high rate of successful treatments. We decided to concentrate mostly on Europe. As India was closed, we were choosing between Russia and Ukraine. Ultimately we chose Ukrainian clinic biotexcom. Reviews were mostly positive and this clinic has high success rates. Though we had some doubts about their medicine, we decided to go there and check everything. Our concerns faded away when we talk to our doctor and program coordinator. We saw fashionable design of the clinic and modern equipment. And the most important we saw so many couples there! People all over the world came to this clinic for surrogacy and de ivf programs. We have no regrets! We are so lucky we went straight to this clinic. Our daughter Kristine was born in May last year. We celebrated her first birthday 2 weeks ago. We paid 49 900 euros for everything. Services were on high level and the procedure was smooth. We have no regrets. In our clinic there were some requirements for women, who want to become surrogates. The surrogate mother must have at least one healthy child. She must be physically, emotionally and mentally healthy. Also she must be checked for genetic diseases. Also the blood group is very important. The surrogate mother has to be under 35 years. Our doctor chose sm for us. She underwent a lot of medical tests before the program. Moreover the pregnancy of our sm was controlled at least once a month. I hope this info will help you. I wish you good luck with your procedure!

  • Thank you for leaving your reply here, I honestly really appreciate this though at the time you replied to me I was in such a devastated state of mind that could not find the words to express my gratitude. as for now as I have commenced my program I can tell how thankful i am to all of you and that your stories and advices made me choose my clinic I am satisfied to get the tx done in. Thank you for so detailed story. I hope it helps not only me but lots of other couples!

    Wish you luck!

  • You're welcome, dear! I'm happy I could help! I'm really glad that my experience could help somebody to make their choice. I wish you all the best, hun! I will cross my fingers for you! I believe you'll become mother very soon! Keep us updated) If you need any advice or simply to talk, I'm always ready to help and support. Wish you good luck!

  • I wish you all the best with your surrogacy procedure. How is your journey going? May I ask which clinic did you chose? My wife and I are looking for good clinics. Unfortunately our first pick wasn't weighed in the balance and found wanting. We were in Ukraine last month in the clinic which is called Biotexcom. Total disappointment... We've just wasted our time and money. Crowded halls, bustle, throngs and long lines. We were standing there for hours! And there wasn't even place to seat! All these were so exhausting and discourage us from any desire to stay there any longer. This clinic has absolutely no respect to their clients. I've never in my life seen such contempt towards people. I hope I'll never face such place again. I hope you'll advice us better clinic to go for surrogacy!

  • Hm, have you really been to biotex? Because from my experience it wasn't anything from what you have written. I have been there for surrogacy and the hall and overall the clinic wasn't crowded at all. there were sometimes lines, especially when it was time to collect my dh's sperm, but in the end we didn't spend a lot of time in the clinic. we even had some free time to see Kiev.

    it seems like you have decided to not continue to the tx just based only the crowdedness of the building. it was worthless then to fly over there and contact the managers, but you did choose this clinic over others.

  • You see, I totally agree with you, vicayevard, but when I was in the clinic it was actually crowded and there were lines, we had to wait for a bit. But I do not think that it is wrong or the reason to stop the tx and start looking for a new clinic.

    I think a lot of people choose the clinic because of their prices and other pros and for me actually this means a lot more than lines or other unimportant stuff

  • But isn't it okay for the fertility clinic that is popular all over the world to be crowded, and even if there are lines and you have to wait for some time it doesn't mean that you won't get to the doctor. you will get helped anyways and if you wait for additional 30 minutes that won't make a giant change in your fertility treatment schedule. It's like saying that you won't buy a sofa because you walked in ikea and it was full of people. the logic of deenr8 is broken in my opinion. I can understand if someone is upset by not getting right into the tx but this is life and you do not always get what you want right away. You will have to wait.

  • I for instance thought that there were not so many couples in the clinic, I didn’t meet no one who could speak English. We felt a bit lonely over there when the girl manager would leave us to do her work. I remember only the nicest nurse who took my dh’s blood. That’s all.

  • I have chosen this exact clinic you declined. I am speechless because I am totally satisfied with their services, I loved how the staff treated us over there and the work of our manager who was always accompanying us everywhere. I can't tell you about the lines, because we did everything early in the morning, I remember we came t the clinic at 9in the morning and had our tests and appts done in 1 hour maximum. We signed te contract right after the dr's appt and were off to go. We told our managers what we want and she told us the possible dates and hours of our pick-ups and appointments so we could choose when to come to Ukraine. Even before the contract signing. I do not understand your complaints either. As if you wanted to get the nicest tx of the all you could've just signed the vip contract...

  • Totally agree! If you're so disappointed with lines and people irritate you then just choose vip package. Yes, it costs more but you won't have to stay in lines or wait for hours. You chose this clinic over others, right? So this clinic had really captured your attention and not just like that. And you left in the very beginning... I really don't understand. I'm not sure you'll find same services and conditions for same price. I know that, because I spent in search really long time. We've also faced lines, we were waiting for hours. But all those inconveniences were forgotten. The most important we have our little daughter Kristine. I have no regrets! I advise you overthink your choice, because your reasons to decline this clinic are ridiculous.

  • I don't see anything wrong with lines. It is bad if people found good clinic which helps them to become parents? People go there not for nothing! Surrogacy is very expensive in our country and we couldn't afford it. We began to look for clinics abroad. We also didn't want to address agencies, because there are many fraudsters among them. We wanted to find clinic with the best doctors and, at the same time, affordable price. It turned out that this procedure is legal in Ukraine. I've read many reviews about Ukrainian clinics and medicine. So we took this chance. We went to BioTexCom for surrogacy procedure. Now we have a wonderful healthy boy. My husband and I are very happy and grateful. I've never regret about my choice. We also faced long lines and long waiting. I think it's not important at all, because now we have our son and we are happy parents. We decided to go to BioTexCom for our second baby. We've already appointed date of our meeting with the doctor. I'm ready to wait one more time, because I know this small inconvenience will pay off.

  • Surrogacy is the only way for me and my wife to become parents. Due to health condition of my wife we have no chance to conceive naturally. I always wanted to have kids. Some people keep telling us that maybe it's our destiny to live childless life. They say that we should take it and that it's God's will. When we started telling about surrogacy to our family and friends, not all of them supported us. My mother in law is fully against the idea that another woman will carry our baby for us. Anyway, it's our lives, our family, our decision. That's why we are looking for a good clinic, where specialists will help us to become parents.

  • Why is your mother in law against the surrogacy? I mean I do not get what is wrong with someone helping you to have a baby. Is it something bad or what? If your wife is unable to carry a child and needs help, she can get it. we live in the world right now where everything is possible. and getting the kid through ivf or icsi for some people it may seem to be unnatural or even ungodly but it helps a lot of couples and they are incredible thankful to have this opportunity to become parents. I hope that there are not so many people who think like your nother in law does. because it is sad..

  • I have met people who said that they do not think that kids born from tubes are "real" human beings, so for me witnessing like someone is just against the fertility treatment itself is just okay, it doesn't mean that those people who do everything to not allow someone get their kids through surrogacy for example, that those people can do harm. they will just say those things and will not do anything harmfull.

  • why mothers in law still interfere their grown up children life? I think this is totally wrong. Maybe because we don't have this in our family. Our parents try to be supportive in our decisions. Thus, we don't share responsibility with them

  • why mothers in law still interfere their grown up children life? I think this is totally wrong. Maybe because we don't have this in our family. Our parents try to be supportive in our decisions. Thus, we don't share responsibility with them. Try to talk with her on this. Her interference wont do any good. Finally, it’s 21 st century

  • Honey, I hope that everything works for you and that you have already found the perfect option and you will get your kid in the next year! Good luck to you! I see that you have been already advised the clinic I am using, so I won't be saying more, I just hope that you have made the right decision! xo's

  • Thank you! Oh I am so overwhelmed with your support and how you are so attentive to even write and ask me if I am doing okay! That's so nice of you, hun! I have chosen ukrainian clinic and am completely satisfied, I am a bit nervous and upset because we have decided to use de in order to save some money because we do not have a lot of them and the surrogacy on my own eggs seems too risky and as we have been told in biotex that the problem is in my egg cells. That was too unfortunate.. I think if we could change it and try the tx with oe..

  • I guess it'd be better if you consult with your clinic's managers and even better if you talk to your dr. Because as I think if they said that the chances are too low they may be true and you will lose a lot of money if you are so careful about it. Have they already matched with the surro? Because if they have, they must’ve begun the stimulation of hers and of the donor. So, I think it will be difficult to stop the tx and will lead to more expenses. What kind of the contract did you choose?

  • No, we have just chosen the donor and that's all. Now we are waiting to be matched with the surrogate mother. I thought of writing to the clinic, but the thing is that if we chose the tx on my oe we would pay less but it'd be too uncertain and if we fail... i do not want to think about what could happen if we fail, that's too scary...

    I thought of writing to our manager, but we have already written her so frequently that I think she is a bit irritated by us constantly asking her questions.

  • we were always on touch with our manager Anastasia. when she was unreachable at clinic, I contacted her on whats app and she answered asap. I think you should ask as much questions as you have. this is their work so that's ok

  • Hello girls! Thanks to this forum we chose Ukrainian clinic. Our first meeting with our doctor was in July and now we are waiting for news. We chose economy package for €29 900. There were also packages with more services for higher price. We can't afford to pay more now. We had 5 failed cycles of ivf before. Those procedures pulled a lot of money from us that's why economy package suits us the most right now. This package includes all necessary services so I think it won't influence the final result) I wish all of us good luck!

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