Finding it difficult to start again - Fertility Network UK

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Finding it difficult to start again


Hello everyone

We went through a pritty tough year last year 1st ivf fresh attempt failed, 1st FET failed and then went on to use our 2nd frozen embryo in October only to receive a phonecall saying it didn't make it past the thaw. No remaining embryos to carry on.

We decided to take a break and enjoy Christmas etc as much as we could and begin again in the new year. Here we are in February and I'm still scared about starting again. My heart broke so many times last year, cried so much and never felt so much pain and disappointment. I just don't know if I can do it again but I don't want to wait forever as we've been ttc for 5 years.

Should I just get on with it and power through or will I ever feel strong enough?

Anyone else felt like this? Thank you xx

3 Replies

Hi Niag

So sorry you've been through so much last year 😔 it's totally rubbish. We're in a similar situation, TTC 4 years and last year was a big low point - 2 IVF and 1 FET. We decided in September to take a break over Christmas and now I'm feeling better but I think because we're going with a new clinic we have a good feeling about and trying several new things which all make me feel positive. I'm aware we could also get another fail but funds allowing, I think this is the only way to get through it, keep going because one way or other we're getting closer to a conclusion whichever way it goes. Learning new things each time. I hope you find the strength to carry on, remember you're stronger than you think x

Hi, the same thing was for us. It's really unbearable to survive all that waiting(

Now I'm 43. But before we were blessed to have our Pam we were to pass a long way. Everything started after 7 years of being married to a wonderful man who wanted to have a son. After it 1.5 years TTC with no obvious reason, as testing showed nothing which could make an obstacle. Well, no female, no male fertility issues but still we couldn't do it on our own. It gets on you so much when you even don't know the specific reason for the condition! Then unexplained infertility diagnosis..Felt broken and torn into pieces - how we had to deal with it..

After all we applied for de ivf in Greece where our Pam was born. But now I feel like the time for baby#2 came and feel like everything is going to start from the very beginning..

It's pretty hard as we have also to make the decision as for the new clinic due to some reasons. Actually we've already got some hints, but still it's like you've never did it before..

Let everything be just OK for all of us. May God make us strong enough to go through all this again xx


Hi Niag. So sorry to hear of your heartache and trying to decide whether to try again. I’m sure you will try again, because you so want to have your little family. Yes, it’s easy said than done, but with the right support I hope you will be able to get through it again. You may benefit from a counselling session, or perhaps there is a support group you could attend in your area. If you have a look on our website you will be able to have a look. Perhaps you have a close friend or member of your family that can support you. Most couples often find it difficult to support one another and can feel isolated, so do try and find someone else too. I do hope that this will be your year. Diane

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