Bad Week πŸ˜₯

Having an awful few days and didn't know where else to go. Our second cycle will start in the next few weeks (hopefully) but I'm so heartbroken this week. My cousin, my niece and 2 friends have all given birth over the past 5 days and I'm not handling it very well. I've had a few 'moments' during the pregnancies but generally been fine but now the babies are all here in finding it too hard to be around them. Having to go out and buy gifts has been awful. I'm currently sat at my desk, after receiving the news and picture from my niece, trying my best to keep it together. Sorry for the moan and self-pity!

12 Replies

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  • Hi, I know how you feel I am having a similar problem and I feel so guilty, I hope your ok and your second cycle goes better for you. We are aloud to feel like that we are only human. You are not alone. I am currently on my first cycle of iu, had my 3rd scan this morning and things still aren't ready. #emotional

  • Totally get you, just spent the weekend with two nephews and a new neice all under 2 :( trying to be super aunty dying inside

  • Hi, I know how you feel & it's completely understandable. It actually got to the point for me when i saw any pregnant woman on the street I'd go into a deep depression. I've avoided so many friends over the last few years because of all the babies all arriving all the time. I have lost friends and distanced myself from family members but that will all change again over time. You have to do what keeps you sane, you have to look after number 1. How wonderful your 2nd cycle is about to start, that's really positive news. I really wish you the best and good luck over the next few days. I found it brilliant relief just moaning on this forum!, X.

  • Hello

    I think everyone on this site knows exactly how you feel. Other people's pregnancies and the birth of their babies can really bring home our own loss. 4 babies in 5 days is a lot to deal with so I'm not surprised you are feeling down. It probably feels like everyone is popping out a baby except you (which of course isn't true!).

    Acknowledging you find it hard and that its ok for you to feel this way does help. It's also ok to put you and your treatment first. If it's too difficult to go out and buy presents right away then leave it until you feel stronger. You also don't need to visit straight away if it's too difficult. Wait until you're ready. You can always tell a white lie and say you didn't want to bombard them with visitors too soon!

    Wishing you the best of luck for your second cycle x

  • My dear girl Kateamelia! Poor thing you are. We all have to overcome such days, weeks, months and years while struggling and waiting, waiting and struggling.. This is just how life turned to be to lots of us. It was the same for me years ago until my first DE baby saw this world. But here I should say when you achieve what you want you start to want more. Now looking at my Pam I have a strong feeling there must be baby#2 to support her and care about her in the future.

    We have a strong decision to have another child. But all this seems that dreadful waiting again. Besides my age isn't on my side, making me feel like the urgency is creeping every other second..

    Also we have to decide as for the clinic where another de procedure must be passed. This huge strength again..

    You must put more faith in your coming cycle. Do not let all those negative thoughts appear in your head. This makes no good. Pull yourself together and go on. May this year bring you lots of baby dust X

  • I feel your pain, just had a text (sat at my desk too!) from my newly pregnant friend... it hurts doesn't it. I dont have a useful answer im afraid.

    I have been told my eggs have had it because of my age (low AMH poor responder blah blah blah) but there is my friend same age just coming up to her 12 week scan. ? WHY?

    Sometimes i feel we just need to feel a bit of self pity! if another person says to me it will be your time next... what will be will be..... some times it would just be nice for them to say. Yes sorry thats really s*it. !

    We plod on and get on with it. I find friends without kids im leaning towards. having a laugh and not talking about kids all the time with them helps! xx

  • You are not moaning or self pitying. You are being so so brave. It's so so hard and upsetting when everyone else is having babies and you're going through hell. You're not alone. Everyone on here is with you and understands how hard it is. Allow yourself to feel upset and be upset you are doing nothing wrong. Going out and buying the gifts Is heartbreaking. Is there a friend or family member who could take care of that for you? Sending loads of love xxxxxxxx

  • By the way - no one should tell you to pull yourself together and not let negative thoughts In - your feelings are normal and natural given what you are going through and denying them is putting even more pressure on yourself. Also,being told to put more faith into your next cycle?! As if it's somehow your responsibility to make it work?! I find these comments unhelpful.

  • Thanks everyone for all your kind words and support. We've been 'trying' for two years now and it's been a year since we found out our only option is ICSI and I honestly don't think I would have made it through without people on here! I still haven't seen any of them or bought gifts, which is difficult for me as I am somewhat of an 'organiser' haha, playing the ill card at the minute to delay. Thanks again everyone xxx πŸ€πŸ€

  • Hi! I feel the same! I don't think there is a day without thinking about this infertility problem. We failed our second cycle and we don't want to do this anymore.it is killing us! We have the following up appointment in 2 months. And then the Dr will tell us what is his advice. I started to hide myself of all the people I know with kids. I love them but it is killing me to be around them. Everyday I find out another friend or relative is pregnant and I thinking I may never be! I am having a very hard time! Good luck with your second cycle! Xx

  • You know, this is just a reflection, but I wonder whether these feelings ever go away. I am lucky enough to have got pregnant on my first round of ivf, I am 20 weeks now. I went to see a friend this weekend who has just had her second, and at some point in the conversation she mentioned she would like to go for another one. I can't help but feeling a bit jealous that other people can just make that decision and get pregnant at the drop of a hat, and sad to know I will never be able to do that. Even being pregnant myself, I still hear others news of pregnancy and think 'why could it not have been that easy for me?'. There you go,something I am slightly embarrased to admit...

  • I totally understand. I don't think you ever get over the long and difficult journeys that we travel when having IVF. I think it makes us appreciate how special an experience getting/ being pregnant is. Congratulations to you, you must be so excited X

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