Feeling so down today: I'm new to this... - Fertility Network UK

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Feeling so down today

Vickal profile image
9 Replies

I'm new to this forum but need to share how I'm feeling today. Have endometriosis and my husband has a very low sperm morphology. Been trying to conceive for over a year and just started fertility investigations. At my last scan I was told there was a very developed folical on my good ovary and I was probably ovulating that day. We took the opportunity to try and i then went on to be 5 days late for my period. We've been trying long enough to not get excited anymore when I'm late but because I was almost sure we had the timing right we both started to get our hopes up. My period came yesterday and now I'm doubled up with my usual endo pain and can't stop crying. So angry for allowing myself to get hopeful. Have friends staying this weekend and need to pull myself together but just can't :-(

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Vickal profile image
Vickal
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9 Replies
Lisaandbilly profile image
Lisaandbilly

Sorry your not feeling your self never give up hope Vickal ❤️I was 6 months pregnant and lost my baby boy Declan this happened 4 years ago we hav been trying to conceive ever since we had all the tests done and nothing we were on ivf waiting list 3 years we are have started treatment and hopefully go for egg retrieval nx wk please don't giv up hope and have faith thinking if u xxxxx

Filmgirl101 profile image
Filmgirl101

I am sorry, it is a terrible feeling. As much as it sucks to get your period after your scan, at least you know your body is functioning and trying to do its job! That's one hurdle you don't have to deal with. Have they checked your tubes yet?

Vickal profile image
Vickal in reply to Filmgirl101

Thank you both for replying. I've been trying to stay positive and concentrate on the things we've got going for us but just let it all get on top of me today.

Tubes are clear, or at least they were when I had a lap in December. My gyne told me to get pregnant asap as the endo will spread and could impact my fertility further. Feel like time is against us.

So sad to hear you lost your baby lisaandbilly and have been waiting so long. Good luck next week x

Kell27 profile image
Kell27

It's as if you posted my story above! Same with me! No words of wisdom but you're not alone and it absolutely sucks and nothing makes it better :-(

Vickal profile image
Vickal in reply to Kell27

Thanks for responding Kell27. How far are you along with fertility treatment? We're still waiting to get our plan. Would be good to know what to expect if you are in a simular boat to us.

Kell27 profile image
Kell27 in reply to Vickal

Just waiting on the letter with a confirmed Ivf date; got onto the list late April and approx 6-9 months waiting so hopefully either end of this year start of next.

Currently taking infertility counselling classes which are ok and AF arrived today yuck:-0

cupcakegirl profile image
cupcakegirl

Just wanted to send some support. I was diagnosed with endo ten years ago at 22, after ten years of pain and problems. I'm married but due to the fact I'm on very high doses of morphine, have ME and have never been able to stop the pill or other hormones (plus zoladex destroyed my libido and we didn't have sex for almost five years). My husband has said we should try once we've bought a house or flat so I came off the pill - my libido came back with a lot of other symptoms and now my GP thinks I might have PCOS. Only having a period every other month. Just the thought of what we are going to have to go through terrifies me.

It seems you're much further along than I am so can't offer much advice but can sympathise with the pain and worry. Have you tried an electric heat pad? I have a large one made by Beurer and it's the best thing for my pain, I couldn't cope without it.

The year after a lap is the best time to get pg, think I may ask for another one when we are ready to try properly (I've had five so far). If not, and the endo is bad, you could look into something like zoladex to shrink it down - it screwed me up but I was on it for two years and you're only meant to be on it for 6 months. It did help with the endo and the pain though.

If you're trying longterm and not on the pill etc, it's a good idea to have a lap every 18 months or so to clear everything out and improve your chances.

There's an excellent fertility team at the John Radcliffe in Oxford who specialise in treating women with endo - amazing doctors and some of the best fertility experts. I believe you can get a referral from anywhere as it's a national referral centre.

Best of luck

X

cupcakegirl profile image
cupcakegirl

Just wanted to send some support. I was diagnosed with endo ten years ago at 22, after ten years of pain and problems. I'm married but due to the fact I'm on very high doses of morphine, have ME and have never been able to stop the pill or other hormones (plus zoladex destroyed my libido and we didn't have sex for almost five years). My husband has said we should try once we've bought a house or flat so I came off the pill - my libido came back with a lot of other symptoms and now my GP thinks I might have PCOS. Only having a period every other month. Just the thought of what we are going to have to go through terrifies me.

It seems you're much further along than I am so can't offer much advice but can sympathise with the pain and worry. Have you tried an electric heat pad? I have a large one made by Beurer and it's the best thing for my pain, I couldn't cope without it.

The year after a lap is the best time to get pg, think I may ask for another one when we are ready to try properly (I've had five so far). If not, and the endo is bad, you could look into something like zoladex to shrink it down - it screwed me up but I was on it for two years and you're only meant to be on it for 6 months. It did help with the endo and the pain though.

If you're trying longterm and not on the pill etc, it's a good idea to have a lap every 18 months or so to clear everything out and improve your chances.

There's an excellent fertility team at the John Radcliffe in Oxford who specialise in treating women with endo - amazing doctors and some of the best fertility experts. I believe you can get a referral from anywhere as it's a national referral centre.

Best of luck

X

Vickal profile image
Vickal

Hi Cupcake girl, I love my heat pad! I use it at work when I'm feeling bad and use hot water bottles at home. I've only had one lap but the gyne said he couldn't lazar any of my endo as it was sticking my bladder and uterus together and he would risk damaging either of these. It was also found on my PoD, both ovaries and my right ovary is stuck to my appendix and 90% covered. I've since learnt that some specialists can burn endo on the bladder but the guy I got wasn't this skilled.

He also ruled out any hormone treatment and emphasised the need to get pregnant asap as the endo will spread. So going through the lap seemed a bit pointless really! It’s been 8 months since my lap so I’m constantly wondering if it’s spread and where. It seems you’ve had very different treatment to me but maybe that’s due to where it was found in you. Maybe I should try to get a second opinion.

Now we’ve done all our tests and scans we’re just waiting to get our ‘plan’ from the fertility clinic. Not sure what to expect. Nervous and emotional!

Thanks for your support x

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