Hello, I am new here and I am terrified and tortured by guilt. To begin with the story I found out about my pregnancy 20 weeks along, up to then I had been consuming alcohol in significant amounts, worst - on 3rd week after conception I was on a holiday in Italy and drank a bottle of whine per evening for a full week in a row, after that up a bottle of whine was consumed several times on weekend evenings. After I found out about pregnancy I was at firts terrified because of the alcohol I had consumed, but as it was too late to consider abortion I soon tried to switch on to thinking positive.
8 moth ago I gave birth to much loved and adored baby daughter. I love her tremendously but since day 1 she have been proving to be rather difficult and troubled little creature. Thus my fears have been growing every day, while caring for her, almost not an hour goes by that I think of weather I have caused her disability and lot of problems to deal with through the life. My guilt and anxiousness are starting to begin to interfere with my ability to be best mother I should be. I would do anything, ANYTHING to undo my stupidity and I deserve to be judged, but my little girl does not deserve the punishment me alone should be facing.
I live in country where health and social service would not help us in current situation. I know it is early for diagnosis but please those who have had experience with infants later diagnosed with FASD, could you share your experience, what were the first signs displayed by the kids later diagnosed withFASD?
She was born at good weight (90%) and normal head circumference (60%), her lip and philitrium seem to me normal, eyes though have very small epichantal folds and the distance between eyes is rather bit big, but so was mine on infancy pictures.
The main issues on our table currently are that she sleeps slightly less that she should at her age, her sleep is very disruptive - 8 month and I still feed her every 2 hours at night, she is very cranky child and seems mostly to be not content. She is rather hyperactive and restless, won't play alone (even 3 min). She constantly needs to be held in arms. She don't like solids much. She is friendly with most strangers, though have also shows some uncomfortability or fear with strangers. She does have good eye contact.
She have reached all physical milestones in average timing. Her one side is bit weaker than the other one, but this is probably due to birth trauma.
Please share your experiences with infants with FASD, have they been similar or what have been the first red flags for you?