Hi, my daughter has severe executive functioning difficulties, in a mix of FASD, with ADHD, ASD, cognitive difficulties etc. I am finding her chaos very difficult to live with. Everyday her bedroom looks as if it's been burgled. This can spread to other rooms in the house. She is just 12 now, and I really want to help her develop some life skills to manage. I regularly get her to help me tidy her room, but she sits there procrastinating, and pretty well doing nothing whilst I tidy up around her. Things like cut nails lying on chair, used sanitary pads lying around the place, scratched furniture, clean and dirty clothes everywhere, including in the drawers, just total chaos. She never shuts drawers or cupboards (anywhere in the house) and things get dropped everywhere. I mostly just get by with managing some kind of order, so that I can feel sane, but she is not really learning. She gets very angry and annoyed when asked to do anything. If I say no telly until she tidies up something - she might on occasion do it properly with lots of prompts and help, but with much anger and resentment.
I have the books 'Smart but Scattered' and 'Late, Lost and Unprepared' which I have dipped into, but have mostly felt overwhelmed by it all. Has anyone had any success with these books? Or other approaches?