Tolieting

[Braveheart14]

Hi everyone hope someone can help me. My son is 4 will be 5 in May he is in reception at school. He has never had a number 2 on the toilet at school and has accidents every day at school and at home. Having a wee is fine but having a poo is a real issue. He is currently taking 20mls of lactulose daily but this doesn’t seem to be helping. He has no pattern in his accidents. We have tried sitting him on the toilet on a regular basis but he just gets off and then poos in his pants.

It is an issue at school as they are now saying it’s effecting his learning as he is having to be changed so much. I am in contact with the health visitor who says there’s not much more that can be done. We are also under a doctor who prescribed the lactulose. The trouble is our son isn’t at all fussed about having accidents!

Thankyou

[Jellylorum]

Do you think your son might be impacted Braveheart14? If he is then the accidents are probably overflow soiling leaking around the impacted stool and you will need to do a disimpaction with Movicol. Your son wouldn't have any control over them and may not even realise when he's had an accident. I would definitely make an appointment to see your GP again to get it checked out, and ask for a referral if your GP seems to be in any doubt. If your son is having multiple accidents per day then it's a sign that he's not completely emptying his bowel each time he goes, so impaction is definitely a possibility.

If your son is definitely not impacted then another reason he might not be completely emptying is if he's trying to withhold his poo (which in itself can lead to impaction, so he may be experiencing both). You might find James Parkin's blog post on this issue useful:

theboywhopooedhispants.blog...

There's also a great book called "What To Do When Your Child Won't Poo" that deals with this problem from a parent's perspective. For a long time I didn't think my son was withholding because he did so many "partial" poos, but since reading James Parkin's blog post I now understand why this was happening. In our case my son started withholding because he was constipated as a toddler and must have experienced some painful poos, although he continues to do it now because he "doesn't want to smell his poo". He doesn't like being changed either, which I think contributes to the withholding (and it sounds as though your son is similar in this respect).

I'm so sorry you're having this experience - I find it's really hard to explain to other people whose children don't struggle in this way as they can't really understand how difficult and stressful it is. This forum is fantastic though and a wonderful source of advice and support.

[Misty10]

Hi does he have any feeling when he goes. I would seek advice from your Dr.