2 year old better than nearly 5 year old. 😅 phew. At least one of them seems ok!

[Poppymum]

So we've been potty training our 2 year old for just over a week. I was so anxious because of her sister ( 5 next month) still wetting several times daily and being investigated still. I was scared they would be the same!

The 2 year old is sometimes going 2 hours between wees! Something her older sister never does! She just makes an hour most of the time, not always, and that's only recently).

The 2 year old empties her bladder and then is dry til the next one. Whereas nearly 5 year old has little wet patches and little leaks frequently.

The 2 year old's wee is a gush which tails off til it stops. Nearly 5 year old goes gush-stop-Gush-stop-gush-stop.

If little one has an accident she says "mum, I weed" and it's a full accident whereas the older one normally has little patches of wee and is so used to it that she doesn't even mention it half the time!

We've just been out bike shopping and nearly 5 year old has wet through her incontinence pants and trousers ( usually padded pants catch it) and 2 year old is dry! I think the day will come soon where we'll be packing the older one spare clothes and not the younger one. Or at least more pairs for the older one.

I have to say it has restored my faith that it's not my fault with the older one! She clearly has a different bladder which is possibly overactive ( we are doing input output charts before her November appointment). I sometimes doubted my ability to potty train. Definitely until she was 4 I did. I now realise there must be a reason she's like this.

Little one is easier after 10 days potty training than older one is after 2.5 years attempted potty training!! She wees and then I can relax knowing that's it til next time, no little leaks or silly small intervals of time. So relieved. She's not saying she needs it yet, but she's 2 years 4 months old and she is aware she needs it as she often stands up and looks worried or sometimes stands by the potty, so we are getting there!

Phew 😅

[Helen36]

Ah! Great news! I was actually wondering the other day if you had braved it after seeing you mention it on another post. I have a nearly two year old that is super keen to potty train (possibly because our world revolves and wee and she knows a wee in the right place is what makes me truly happy!!). I can already tell that she will be so different to my 4.5 year old who sounds very similar to yours.

My older one started oxybuticin for a suspected overactive bladder about 8 weeks ago and we have seen a dramatic improvement. Not perfect and it took 5-6 weeks to kick in, but she is going longer between wees, and not so many leaking patches. And the best thing is, it has given her so much confidence we've seen a change in her attitude too. (Less of the tantrums if I ask her to go or if she needs to get changed). If we miss a tablet (which has happened once or twice) it is back to the leaking again.

Anyway, thought I'd share that x

[Littlecabbage in reply to Helen36]

Very similar story to mine, except I have boys. A 6 year old with urgency, very frequent urination and regular leaking, and a perfectly potty-trained 4 year old! ^ year old is currently undergoing investigations for an overactive bladder, and like you, I am now confident that it is neither my fault nor his fault that his bladder behaves like it does.

Thank you Helen36 for sharing your oxybuticin story as that really gives me hope. Often, it feels like everyone on here says that it doesn't work, but I tell myself that it is only probably the people for whom it doesn't work that come back on the forum, and that people who have success with it move on with their lives and forget to share the positive story!

I hope we will be offered medication and that it will be similarly useful.

[Littlecabbage in reply to Littlecabbage]

"^" should read "6" in above post!

[Helen36]

I actually forgot my main point of replying to the original message which was to say that I too was completely convinced that I had just potty trained badly or does something else fundamentally wrong. I once asked a continence nurse if perhaps I had fed her too frequently as a baby and it had trained her bladder to wee little and often - she looked at me like I was mad but these are the dark corners of our minds as parents! Not our fault, not their fault. Very hard to remember, but very true.

I agree that there are very few positive stories out there about oxybuticin. We have started on a low dose which is apparently the trick to managing side effects. She was more weary for the first week or so but not the extreme fatigue or mood swings I feared. We had one day of dilated pupils about 48 hours in, but they had disappeared by bedtime. She does however get quite sharp tummy pains every few days that I think is the oxybuticin. Calpol seems to help. The tablets are tiny and she coped with swallowing them fine right from the start but I bribed her with a chocolate button for the first few tablets! Good luck if you do go on to it xxxx