Developing erectile dysfunction

[WellySam]

I have been suffering increasing from this over the last few years. I now haven't had a full erection for around three months. As my partner and then I have been unwell in turn, we haven't had sex for months. In fact due to other problems I have, I have been sleeping in the spare room.

I have been masturbating regularly but have not reached a firm erection. I do ejaculate and enjoy masturbating but I would like to resume sex with my (male) partner. I am worried that my lack of an erection will spoil it for me and for him.

I am reluctant to take any meds, so are there any other techniques you could recommend Do cock rings work for example?

[westbury18]

Without knowing anything more about your age, weight, whether you smoke, etc, it's difficult to give the best advice. I would encourage you to speak to your doctor, in case they think any more tests are needed. I was 43 when I began experiencing some erectile dysfunction. That was nine years ago. Since then I've been watching my diet, exercising more, and (as prescribed by a urologist) been taking 10mg of Tadalafil (sometimes sold as Cialis) twice a week, or less often if I've not got any sex on the horizon. It's really helped and I've not had any problems getting a firm erection. In fact, some guys have commented on how firm I am and how it often stays a little hard after climax (which is always nice to hear). I've never tried cock rings but personally have always been a little wary of them (I know other guys use them a lot, so by all means experiment).

I have had bouts of using a vacuum pump (a cheap one from a sex shop - not an expensive, medical-grade one), more as an exercise tool before masturbation once or twice a week, as I think pumping blood into all the blood vessels of the penis is not a bad thing in maintaining them. It comes with an elastic cock ring that you can slip on after you've pumped, but I've never tried using the ring.

L-citrulline and L-arginine are amino acids linked to good blood vessel performance, so I also take those (from health food shops or ordered online), and they were also suggested by the urologist who saw me. Whether they have a big impact or not, I can't really say - I think it's more down to the Tadalafil.

If you smoke, do try to quit – as that can make a big difference.

There are lots of things to try out there, so wishing you the best of luck - and don't be shy of talking to a doctor about it.

[WellySam in reply to westbury18]

Thanks, I don't smoke but an a bit over weight.

I tried Viagra which gave me a very hard erection but not much pleasure. I also felt a but unwell after.

is Cialis different?

[westbury18 in reply to WellySam]

I've not tried Viagra (yet). My doctor recommended Cialis as it stays in your system for up to 72 hours - so taking a small dose twice a week means you've almost always got some in your system, whereas I believe Viagra lasts about four hours? One other thing I forgot to mention: Blood flow around your body decreases significantly after a heavy, fatty meal as your body diverts blood to your intestines to absorb the food - so avoid a big, fat-laden meal before sex or masturbation. I have noticed it more difficult to get a hard-on in the evening after a cream-laden dessert, whereas after a period of no food (i.e. on waking in the morning), hard-ons are easier. Something else to bear in mind.

[WellySam in reply to westbury18]

Thanks. I had a call with my GP booked today anyway, so I raised it (no pun intended). He prescribed viagra before. He has now prescribed Cialis so hope to get it tomorrow

[WellySam in reply to westbury18]

Pleased to report a good first experience of Cialis. Took m first dose early this morning and had a nice erection that ran the course

[westbury18 in reply to WellySam]

Pleased to hear it! I found that the first time I took Cialis, the effect was more 'subtle' than I was expecting. I think I'd read horror stories about people taking Viagra and getting a hard-on that wouldn't go down, or having side effects, which made me a little nervous about trying an ED drug. But once I realized that it doesn't immediately give you a hard-on, and you do need to be aroused, I understood it better. All the best to you and your man.

[WellySam in reply to westbury18]

Exactly. Apart from making me feel ill afterwards, Viagra gave me an erection that was almost unpleasant. It was very hard and I lost sensation. I also had difficulty climaxing.

Cialis gave me a more natural hard-on this morning. At first, like you, I didn't think it was working, but as I got aroused I saw the difference. It was firm like it used to be, but not steel hard, and I enjoyed playing with myself. It took me longer to climax than normal, but that is no bad thing when you are enjoying it.

Many thanks for the recommendation.

[Hidden in reply to WellySam]

Maybe you took too high a dose of viagra? Try breaking that 100 mg pill and take a half dose.

[TheGeorge in reply to Hidden]

The packet of Viagra Connect says "take a whole tablet," ie. don't cut it. What do you think happens if you do cut the tablet in half?

[WellySam in reply to Hidden]

Thanks. As I have commented above, I have now tried Cialis which is really working for me

[mark32]

Hi - mirroring what others have said , without knowing more its hard to comment but talk to partner- you need to , this can push people apart but you need to talk & talk to gp