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Endometriosis UK
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Feeling so confused need some advice please x

Hi ladies I really need your help.

I've been suffering with endo for many years. I've had a few ops where by gyne Dr has said that my bowel, bladder and womb are all stuck together and in turn are stuck to my stomach wall. Not only that my left tube and ovary is welded to my bowel. The mass of organs is also stuck to my rectum which is pulled up and stuck to my spine. I also have two fibroids which are at the entrance to my womb and measure in total 11 cms across. I've seen a lot of ladies refer to having operations to excise the endo and have been fine for months/years after.

Can I ask a personal question? I am wondering whether any of you ladies have had this procedure whilst being single? I am having trouble finding an understanding boyfriend due to the problems I am having with the endo, so after my last lap I asked to be referred for sperm donation. Having a baby is now or never for me so my Gyne Dr said. I am now seeing a fertitlity Dr who has confused me on each visit I have had. He said he won't spare the expense on trying to go "slowly slowly" to remove the endo as I won't benefit because I am not in a relationship. I did challenge this saying well wouldn't it benefit me for the sperm donation? he just ignored me but agreed to have another look inside my womb to check it's condition. One visit he said I could have a baby and have a perfectly normal pregnancy and the next time said it would be far too dangerous for me to conceive and carry.

I am now off work with depression and feel so terrible low I have no idea what to do now or where to turn.

Any advice would be really appreciated.

Love to you all x

5 Replies

Hi Tracysam, I am undiagnosed and do not have any advice for you I am afraid, but was so sorry to read of your heartache. I too am single, but at 43, having further children is not one of my wishes. I just wanted to say that from past experience, you have to be firm with the doctors, tell them what YOU want, whether you are in a relationship or not, it is YOUR decision (with definite, objective advice, and your health being of utmost importance).

Just wanted to say, thinking of you, and in the week or so I have been on here, there are some lovely ladies with some great, first hand advice.

Take good care of you xxx


Thanks Amb43 for replying, there are many lovely ladies on this site. Its nice to find such support many people don't understand what it is like to have endo. Take care and god bless. p.s. hope you have a fab christmas xx


Hi - really sorry. I personally think you need to ask for a referral to a different consultant.

I was also in the same state internally that you describe. My first gynae consultant said my only hope was a hysterectomy and oophrectomy. I wont go into the long story but I did research, came across a specialist endo surgeon and underwent total radical peritoneal excision surgery. This really is the best option for stage 4 endo like you describe. This op removes the whole top layer of the surface of the peritoneum and thus removes all seen and unseen endo and separates and replaced innards that had become well stuck up out of place. It was a long op (7.5 hours) but was all done keyhole.

Some consultants do say they do excision surgery but quite often this is only patch excision which does what it says on the tin - removes patches of endo. That is fine if you do only have patches. Trouble with endo is that there is often unseen endo under the surface which will emerge over time - and which usually means you just keep going back for more. The surgeon I saw now only does private work and I am not permitted to provide details. He has a brilliant and informative website. Feel free to send me a private email if you would like me to give you details for your information.

All best wishes x


Hi Stevieflp thanks for responding to my e-mail I would really like the details of this website. I hope you have a fantastic xmas x


My wife had stage 4 endo, but now no more, she is in very early stage of pregnancy after 2 miscarriages, I was not very clear on what the endo was like from her side when I married her 10 years ago, but after watching her vomit from pain one night and 2 laparoscopies, I have a great compassion for all you ladies who suffer from the condition and want to make the lifestyle change for health once again. Do not give up hope ever, plse don't.


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